I salute you, GajKnight, for being brave enough to make a Top Ten Fetishes of All Time
blog... but how could you not even have the sanity to include me!?
All kidding aside, porn plays a pretty big part of all our lives, and since I already shared way
too much information about myself
with you guys anyway, I am going to share with you all my own list of my Top 10 favorite fetishes, all with enough details to make you weak in the knees! To be super honest, I had a hard time picking only
ten things, and considering how much porn there is on the internet, and how much of it I actually enjoy, I thought that trying to limit it would be damn near impossible. However, after extensive
research (you see how much I sweat for my blogs?), cuts have been made, fetishes have been prioritized, and now I bring onto you the top ten things that make me horny (disclaimer: all fetishes are based on hentai content
because... ew, real girls).
Now, I bet you're wondering: how does one rank his or her (because I know you're out there!) favorite fetishes? Is it based on how much of it does he consume every day when he's getting his daily fix? Is it based on which one gives him the hardest erection that's tougher than a diamond? Is it based on whether he's afraid to admit it because he wants to socially accepted and not casted as that weird guy who likes this and that? They are all good questions, but I am making this list based on how much of a personal attachment I have to these fetishes of mine and how much they play into my fantasies.
And by personal attachment, I totally mean my penis, so yes: the list is based on how hard I get.
See what I did there?
Honorable Mention - Bestiality Hypno gets the bitches
Yeah, this started off kind of strong, didn't it? Well, in case you're afraid of how much extreme the list is going to be if this didn't
made the cut, you can relax: the list of fetishes actually get more tame as it goes on... to much of your disappointments, I'm sure. Still, what exactly do I find appealing about an animal that I would want to stick my penis in it? Well... I don't: I like it when women
are having sex with animals, especially when they are doing so not because they're forced, but of their own free will (well, as free as the artist chooses, anyway). Seeing girls play with their dogs in a much more intimate fashion is pretty interesting in the sense that it's typically playful... but "playing" with horses is another matter all together: the penis is so big that it feels like the epitome of ultimate pleasure when she sticks it in, and the amount they discharge is enough to have girls shower in it. Plus, any woman horny enough to have sex with an animal is most certainly going to consider me... but seeing as how I lack a big penis myself, chances are that she's going to be quite disappointed.
Also almost making the cut in its place would be either furries (like half-dog, or half-fox especially, half-human hybrids) and monster girls: those long, forked tongues, cat-like eyes, and unique anatomy makes for some interesting encounters... and some creative sexual position would make me ditch humans. Speaking of encounters, I pretty much wanted to include bestiality because I like seeing Pokemon having sex with humans as well: Hypno seems to be a popular choice amongst artists (hopefully I'll cover that in another rousing, or should I say arousing
, article about Pokemon
doujinshi: I've been meaning to do a three-parter of that for a while)... as well as Machomps for their muscles, Lickitungs and Gengars for their tongues, Tangela for tentacle sex, Dittos for gooey tentacle sex, and so on. Hey, we gotta raise their Affection meter somehow: you don't want to teach a Pokemon Return and have them deal like 1HP of damage, do ya? Well, then you better take a another good look at the word "grinding" then!
P.S.: I'm totally attracted to Gardevoir and Miltank (yes, really), but that's another blog.
Number 10 - Futanari There's always one right around the corner...
Speaking of penises, I am always down with a sexy futanari lady: I don't really know what that word means (Wikipedia says it means something "of two kinds") but in this context, it's going to be referred to women with penises. Now, this is going to confuse people by making them think about shemales, trannies, and hermaphodites, so let me straighten things out (totally not subtle erection joke): I'm talking about actual girls with actual penises, and there's many different types of futanari girls, from the standard being a regular woman with just a penis attached to her, to the deluxe, full-packaged ladies with all of the male fixings you expect a guy to come with (balls, pubic hair, and all). Then there's newhalfs which, to be honest, I can't tell the difference (I think
it might be shemales), but if there's two separate tags for it in the anime porn sites I go to, then there's gotta be something past a futanari's veiny, manly monument that I'm just not seeing... and trust me, the thing about futanari porn is that artists like their meat sticks to be like how Americans want their McDonald's french fries: super sized. I want to remind you that, because I like giant penises, bestiality ]almost
made the list... and I was sad to see it go. :(
Am I gay? No, of cour- well, actually, since two of the fetishes I cut out were traps (like Bridget from Guilty Gear
) and otokonokos (boys in woman's clothing, especially lingerie), you
might think so... but I like to think myself as straight, and that's what matters. Either way, I can't explain it, but there's something about a girl having a giant, erect penis that rips past the tough denim jeans she's wearing that makes me start salivating... and that "I totally want to stick it inside you and make you scream like a little bitch" look that she gives me that seems to bind me under her spell (plus, it's a very wonderful to say how much she loves me). As much as I love their giant penises though (I'm talking the size of totem poles!), unforunately, I would not be able to fit it inside my mouth, and I'm sure my poor bum wouldn't handle it either (I'm not Mr. Slave!), so I can't have much fun with them... if they were real, of course. Besides, most futanari porn usually involves lesbians, though there are
straight, heterosexual futanari porn... well, as straight as watching a guy get a penis shoved in his ass can be anyway.
Number 9 - Bukkake That is milk, I assure you!
Another kooky word on the list, "bukkake" is, in a sexual sense at least, when multiple guys (or girls, if they're futanari, because that's hot too) gather around a person to shower them with sperm like a circle jerk, but with a female target; in a nonsexual sense, it could refer to the style of pouring hot broth over a bowl of noodles (I'm going to avoid ordering that to avoid misunderstandings). Even though there's typically no sex during
this scene as it usually happens at the end of a group session, and sometimes there's actually no penetrative sex at all, it's interesting to see how many people come together (that wordplay) and donate their fluids to charity... which is probably what her name is: I didn't bother to ask. Either way, there's something about spraying a bunch of sticky, slimy stuff on a woman that makes it feel somewhat perverted, and fun pornographic history fact: bukkake was invented because, since genitals must be censored in accordance to Japanese law, sperm isn't required to be, so this is a way to make a scene feel more hardcore despite that.
Anyway, I chose bukkake because a bunch of my fetishes involves cum on many places, such as their boobs, butts, face, lips, mouth, thighs, feet, genitals, glasses, hands, hair, clothes, panties (especially if there's cum on the inside and she continues to wear it)... so I'm going to cheat by having my cake and eating it too! Well, I mean, I would
, if the icing doesn't look so sickening at the moment... but hey, speaking of icing and slathered whipped cream, I think this might just be me, but I wouldn't mind having sex with a woman after
a full body bukkake scene (which, in hentai, is entirely possible with even only one participant!): sure, she's dirty and drenched, and chances are some of that stuff is going to rub off on me... but if hentai has taught me anything, it's that sperm smells something like an aphrodisiac to a woman, and if she's going to be in heat, I want to take full advantage of that, even if it means having to use some other guy's sperm as a lubricant... accident or otherwise.
Number 8 - Group Wonderful 101 indeed...
However "hardcore" bukkake scenes are, there's nothing like seeing people work in tandem to pleasure someone! There's multiple versions of group scenes, such as two males and one female, two females but one male, an equal ratio of men and women... but while I enjoy pretty much all kinds, I am
quite partial to the eloquently named "gangbang": seeing one woman handle so many penises at once is pretty exciting, and the scene seems so busy when there's so much going on, and yet only so many minutes in that video player, that you could skip to any part of the video and you're bound to see something exciting... that something being a penis, because there's a lot of them! Plus, gangbangs also seem to empower the female image: gangbangs could be considered a marathon of sorts because while the guys can tag out when they're tired, the woman has to withstand everything by herself (if there's more than one, then it's considered an orgy, I believe), and seeing her beg for more when everyone's tuckered out is inspiring. Seriously, think about it.
My favorite type of gangbangs though involve the previously mentioned futanari lesbians, specifically scenes when the girls with penises have sex with a woman who doesn't (though I'm quite fine with she's rocking one too: the more the merrier!). Why? Because aside from the excessive ejaculations (don't even bother with a mop: just grab a bucket and scoop it up), when I fantasize this type of arrangement, I like to imagine myself invited to this little "get-together", and even though the females all have "party favors", we're all going to be using them on the "birthday girl". In fact, one of my favorite hentai manga involves three futanari girls having a gangbang with the school librarian (who is a total MILF, but we'll get to that later), and I enjoyed the manga so much that I almost wrote out my own version of it: yep, that's right, I would've written smut in my own spare time. It's really just the same story with a little more characterization (I had to add myself in the story: I'm the one who call dibs on the vagina, too!) and some extra scenes to make the story run smoother (did I mention that I actually read hentai manga for the plot sometimes?), but one of these days I'll write it just for the hell of it.
Number 7 - Ahegao It was hard enough trying to find a videogame image, let alone one safe for work...
You may not be familiar with the term, but if you've seen hardcore hentai (and quite possibly real porn if you're watching someone being overly dramatic), then you've seen what it looks like: you know that heat of the moment when the woman's eyes roll up to the back of their heads, their lips quivering like their face is melting, the way they stick their tongues out and stretch their legs apart as they form the peace sign with their hands (disclaimer: I think it's supposed to be "v for victory", but I'm not going to split hairs)? Yeah, that odd, yet somewhat arousing, dopey look on their face is what an "ahegao" is. Apparently meaning "weird face", "ahegao" is essentially what a woman's face looks like when she orgasms, only taken to such extremes that you'd think she was losing her sanity. There's another, more straight-forward term on these anime sites called "fucked silly", which is virtually the same thing: I think the only difference is that "fucked silly" means that their faces aren't weird enough to be considered "ahegao" (it's much more subtle, and usually more grounded), but it's within the same territory.
And what territory is that? That the woman having sex is obviously enjoying it! Sure, in 99% of hentai, the woman makes it apparent that she really loves sex anyway (even in that rare, 1% instance when they don't, they eventually start to love it within the next chapter, episode or whatever)... but the idea that she loves it so much that she loses her rational thought, as though trading them for increased orgasms, just makes porn much more fun to watch because that's also when she starts to really get into it, usually calling for cocks to be shoved in every hole in her body. I don't know, there's just something about watching a woman lose herself to pleasure that makes it a lot more twisted, and way more enjoyable: maybe it's because I'm a selfless giver, so if I'm
, then it's only natural of me to want to make sure that she's
going to be enjoying herself
... but enjoying herself with a bunch of guys too, because solo female maturbation porn could only last for so long without getting boring, and now that I think about it, solo masturbation scenes are actually quite selfish of her. Tsk tsk: sharing is caring, and that includes orgasms.
Number 6 - Teachers One of my favorite "Social Links"
Speaking of sharing, that was something my teacher taught me... and recently, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
, whose porn has become the cartoon equalivant of Sonic the Hedgehog
porn, along with the Winx Club
and Totally Spies
). Anyway, my teachers have taught me a lot of thing throughout my education: how to solve math problems using equations, how to use correct grammar when writing, how to be the perfect lover... Okay, so maybe not that last one, but one common fetish that a lot of people must have because there's so much porn of it, hentai or otherwise, is sleeping with the teacher to get that easy "A". Think about it: you get to have sex and
sleep during class, because you and
your teacher are gonna want you to be as well-rested as possible when lunchtime roll around, or you get held back after class for that private tutor session! Not only that, but sleeping with someone who is presumably smarter than you sounds pretty nice: who knows, with the English skills she possess, she could somehow turn talking dirty into a poem! All the rappers do it!
Here's a little flashback to my younger self: right around the time I discovered porn, which is very early in my middle school years, I had (who I thought to be, at least) a pretty hot teacher... and since I knew what sex was, I knew that I wanted to have sex with her, and that's because my penis told me. I remember how nice she was to me, I remember the way she looked when she laughed to something I said funny... and I remember that, if we ever wanted a romantic tryst, we could use the storage room at the back of her classroom: it locks from the inside, and even if there's a small window you could peek through, it's nothing a little scotch tape and a piece of paper couldn't cover up, and she always had those on hand. Yeah, I've been a dreamer for a long time, and I used to fantasize dating a teacher... it's just so unforunate that the ratio of hot female teachers is so, so
low that it's pretty damn rare to come across one (that phrasing though!). Think that our age differences would've pose a problem? Not for what's next on my list!
Number 5 - Straight Shota I don't know what he's complaining about: the view is fine down here...
The last Japanese term on the list itself, "shotacon" is a portmanteau of "Shotaro complex", which means something along the lines of "an attraction to young boys"... not unlike how "lolicon", which refers to a "Lolita complex", is used as "an attraction to young girls". So, while I might
have something of an attraction to anime
boys dressed in frilly, little lingerie, the one taking the 5th spot is "straight
shota", which pretty much entails to young boys having sex with girls who are usually older than them (as opposed to standard shotacon being younger boys having sex with older ones). This is pretty appealing to me because, since I got into porn at a very early age, and most of the hentai I consumed feature very
voluptuous women (we'll get to that in a minute) instead of girls around my age, so I was always lusting after them instead. However, since most hentais feature mostly high school students having these sexcapades, I thought I would have to wait until I was older to even begin fantasizing about being with them.
Nope: turns out that, while not animated, there exists hentai images where boys who look like they are probably still in elementary school are having sex with a woman old enough to be their mother (I should mention that, not surprisingly, a lot of these include mother-son incest). Though I sadly had to grow up without having any of these sexual encounters happening to me (especially with my aforementioned teacher, because damn was she a hottie... did I say just that about a real
girl?), sometimes I like to imagine myself as being younger and wondering what it would been like had it happen. It's funny: they always said it's the things that you didn't
do that you regret most in your life, and while it wasn't exactly in my control, it might've been totally awesome to lose my virginity when I was still in early middle school... but it's too bad that it's now impossible to make that dream come true (until someone discovers the "fountain of youth" I guess). However, I guess my desire to have sex with an older woman must still be dwelling within me like an unfulfilled dream because my next fetish just so happens to be...
Number 4 - MILFs (Mothers I'd Like to Fuck) The best example of a videogame MILF
Whether they are actually mothers or not, since this term, like boobs in most anime, seems to be tossed around all willy-nilly... let me just say that I love me some older, more mature women: a beauty mark off the corner of their eyes, a pair of glasses that makes her look extremely intelligent, a nice conversative pantsuit with a bright red lipstick applied, and that leftover layer of fat that remains after pregnancy (I don't know what it's called, but I actually find that attractive... though then again, I find a lot
of things attractive, like girls with giant penises capable of slamming through brick walls)... all of it are oh so sexy. Almost anytime I see a mother in animes and such, they're always the first people I go to look up hentai for: would you believe that, from one episode of The Amazing World of Gumball
, that I searched up the mother? Pretty much all the "MILF" fantasies I have are the "reverse Ms. Robinson" scenario where I started out dating some girl I met in school... only to set my sights on her mother instead. Don't feel bad for her daughter though: she usually joins in on the fun as well, so it's all good... especially for me!
Some people like their women to be "Christmas cakes", which I'll explain: I'll assume that you know Christmas is on the 25th of December, so let's say that you want to buy a cake to celebrate... obviously, if you buy a cake too early, it'll spoil, but if you buy it after the 25th, they aren't special anymore, so the best idea would be to get it a week beforehand up until Christmas (18th), right? Well, some people think that, for marrying women, it's essentially the same thing: if you marry them too late, they're stale, and if you marry them too early... you go to jail. Humor aside, unmarried women are supposed to be "embarassing" because marriage is a big deal to women in that culture... but because I like my women to have lived a little, I think that, the more experience they have in life, the attractive they are to me... and the more I get to binge on some leftover cake. Speaking of experiences, chances are, these women have had sex enough times to know what they want, and how to get it... so I imagine they're great in bed and are bold enough to take charge (thank you, equal rights!).
Number 3 - Succubus Whip it... whip it good
But you know what knows how to have mindblowing sex? Succubi: female demons whose sole purpose is to seduce humans and have sex. Sure, these mythological beings might be draining your blood or life force, in addition to taking your sperm, giving them to an incubus (demon male equalivant) to impregnate women with... but I like to imagine that the trade off is well worth it. Anyway, since succubi have been around for a long time, even way back in medieval times where wet dreams were suspected to be their evil-doings... their legends, depictions, and such have all been changed over the course of time: some say they look demonic and frightening, and others say they look so drop dead gorgeous that no man could resist them... and since this is my
fantasy, I'm going to go with the latter. I love reading about succubi, and I even bought a Japanese anime artbook/ encyclopedia just so I can... have it collect dust in my possession because, wouldn't you know it, I can't read Japanese (I have
looked up some of the mythological names and legends in Google though, and damn would I love a localized version of this book). You can obviously tell that I'm very
fascinated by succubi.
And with that fascination comes researching the subject... and while I used the word "research" as an excuse to look up porn earlier in this blog, I actually do mean I read up on succubi. Yeah, I don't know as much as I like, but I hope there'll be a time when I can learn more about them, but either way, the stories I've heard do draw inspiration... and I hope to, one day, write a tragic love story between a human and a succubus in the same vein as the series Spice and Wolf
(which, while it doesn't feature succubi, should still be given a shot anyway). Not only do I already have an idea of how I want to story to go (tone, themes, personalities, and all that), but I even have my own idea of what a succubus should look like and how they function along with their own mythology... but that's another blog. Regardless, I never would've gotten into succubi if it weren't for Morrigan Aensland of the Darkstalker
series because it was her that not only piqued my interest, but also have been the product of many fantasies, some of which have become ideas for new stories. One day I'll have to dedicate a blog to her, aside how she taught me how to fight
. Until then, I'll just offer her my sperm as tribute in the meantime.
Number 2 - Goddesses Guess who my main's gonna be? Wrong: Mega Man. But she's my alternate.
Since I got plenty of sperm to spare, I might as well offer some of it to the other side of the alignment spectrum: goddesses. Like most of my fetishes, I can't explain it, but there's something about a heavenly women with a halo over their heads, angelic wings, and a motherly sense of comfort that makes me want to rise to the occassion. While that does sounds pretty synonymous with angels, as both of them are practically immortal and can live forever... the word "angel" invokes the image of dainty teenage girls whereas goddess sounds like it belongs to an older woman of some sorts, and I did explain earlier why I'm into older women. I do feel a little weird about the idea of having sex with a goddess though: since it's sex, am I supposed to act like an animal, because I don't want to, like, ruin my shot at heaven by giving into my lust. What would a goddess "feel" like anyway: I can imagine succubus sex would be tight since I assume their bodies are built for wringing the sperm out of you... but then, are goddesses "loose" in comparison? When you put your penis in her vagina, does it feel like soft pillows or clouds?
If it sounds like I'm putting too much thought into it, it's because, as much as I think about succubi having sex with me while I'm sleeping, I like the idea of being with a holy being... and that's because I have such
a huge crush on Palutena from Kid Icarus: Uprising
that I wish that I could be her servant: she has a very beautiful face, lusciously long hair, some really nice curves, a playfully teasing personality, a motherly-like concern for others, a great sense of humor... which, speaking of her dialogue, is perfectly voiced by Ali Hillis (who also voices Liara T'Soni in Mass Effect
and Lightning in Final Fantasy XIII
). Sure, I've seen some pretty hot goddesses before, and plenty of them in very porn-like positions surrounded by plenty of ejaculating penises... but even without porn (though that's nice too!) Palutena still manages to singlehandedly (...nah, way too easy) win her way into my fantasies: she's pretty damn close to being my "perfect woman", and the feeling that she's so much like the lovely big-sister type of person is just icing on the cake.
Number 1 - Sisters I literally can't stop grinning when I look at her!
Maybe it's because
Palutena feels like a big-sister does that make her so attractive to me since my number one fetish is brother-sister incest! While my sister doesn't have to be a goddess or a succubus, she does
have to be of complete
blood relation, which means no step-sisters, no surrogate substitutes, and even half-sisters (who only share one parent with you) don't cut it... though if she happens
to be a goddess or a succubus, that's fine too! Ideally, I like to imagine my incest with an older sister because it fits in with the fetish I have for mature women and straight shota... but if she's younger than me yet acts in a really cute fashion, which is apparently the general preference of the many incest hentai that I've read, then I'm good with that as well (especially Nana in Akiba's Trip: Undead and Undressed
, who is so unbearably adorable from the clips I've seen that I have
to give her a hug)! Now, there's usually a negative connotation when it comes to announcing that incest is my favorite fetish of all time, and no doubt that some of you are raising your eyebrows and slowly moving your pointer to close the tab, but... actually, no "buts": I can't help my interest in them.
Now, I'm no psychologist... but I think my obsession with sisters stems from a combination of my shy personality, a little something about my childhood, and my tendencies to create fantasies for myself: see, I'm not exactly a sociable person in the real world when it comes to males or
females so, realistically, the chances of meeting a woman to befriend seems impossible, even to this day. When I was growing up, I used to love the idea of playing house and dolls, even watching "girly" television shows things like Powerpuff Girls
, Totally Spies Sailor Moon
, and Cardcaptor Sakura
... but since I had brothers and guy classmates who were into sports and such, they would make fun of me for liking those things, so I didn't really have anyone to play with. I guess, in my loneliness, I would wonder what it would be like to have a sister, and upon building upon the fantasy, I fell in love with it: hopefully, we would share the same interests and, being that she's my sister, I wouldn't feel too shy around her and we could play together all day, maybe even one day "play house" for real by getting married... which would've sounded a lot more cute if this weren't written in a fetish blog under the incest. Huh.
Anyway, that's a list of my
top 10 favorite fetishes, and if you're reading this sentence, then I hope that this means that I didn't creep you out enough to close the tab! What are your favorite fetishes? Comment down below, or if you're brave enough, blog it and go into detail! I'm just gonna run now because, chances are, my list just made me a target for multiple government databases and I need to get a headstart.
- "Petals dance for our valediction and synchronize to your frozen pulsation...
Swirling wind sings for our reunion and 9.8 is my acceleration." - Mili
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