Hey there, this is your lovely host, Dreamweaver, here with the hippest, most happening community feature ever, Comments of the Week! As some of you may be aware, I've been behind on Comments of the Week for several weeks now, giving you the stale comments that funny community members such as yourselves said the week before. Everyone knows these things got an expiration date!
So, in an attempt to finally play catch-up, I'm hopefully going to make this Sunday a double feature just in time to watch the season finale of The Walking Dead. If you don't see two edition today, then I have failed horribly... but then again, what else is new?
Anyway, these comments deserve your attention, whether you've been neglecting the comments section like your ugly stepdaughter, or want to sleep with them again like your smoking hot sister, then check no further! As always, you can check out comments in three flavors:
TRUTH: female ferrets can supposedly die if they don't have sex for a year.
LOL: what if human females were like that?
WUT?: I'd still be a virgin.
If you weren't here for last week's edition, which features comments from the week before the week before last, then head on over to this link and see what the hell you missed out on! If you did... well, then I guess you're cool in my book. Cheers.
Dreamweaver: It all makes sense to me now.
By the way, anyone wanna buy a walker?
Dreamweaver: The Australian sequel to Sharknado!
Dreamweaver: Not as good as sushi rolls, but it'll work.
Dreamweaver: So this is why consoles are at war with PC: it's for the good of us all.
Dreamweaver: Or marrying me.
From Trippytip Quickpost
Dreamweaver: She can work my leather any day.
Except Sunday. That's the Goddess' day.
Dreamweaver: I SEE WHAT YOU DID THERE.
Dreamweaver: Just like my HIV test.
From SAME TREE
Dreamweaver: Well, to be fair, it has also provided us porn, so it can't be ALL bad.
Dreamweaver: Technically, YOU just said "we haven't."
Dreamweaver: Why can't we put them in a tirement house?
Dreamweaver: The man is too nice for the internet.
Dreamweaver: Are you at least a hot ass? Because they're the ones who gets girlfriends.
Dreamweaver: Yes, you are right.
Dreamweaver: I wonder if they have to make up a promotion.
Dreamweaver: That's a good thing.
Dreamweaver: You said "amazing" wrong.
Dreamweaver: I wanna know what kind of prom you go to!
Dreamweaver: Guess we won't know until we have a baby underwater.
Now, who wants me to get them pregnant? My penis is only good for one time a day, so hot chicks only.
Dreamweaver: What if I die for real? Do I still die in the game?
Dreamweaver: And here I thought he just wanted a badass team of Gyarados.
Dreamweaver: I usually need both volumes dials jacked up to hear the woman moaning during sex.
Unless it's groaning, at which point I can hear that clearly enough.
Dreamweaver: So when women say I'm "pushing her buttons," does that mean they're really asking for sex?
Aw, man, curse my ignorance!
Dreamweaver: Donald Trump is running for president? Good thing we don't live in your timeline!
Wait a minute.
Dreamweaver: Confirmed: Google is good enough to read the future.
Dreamweaver: If you want shame and dishonor, just sleep with me.
Dreamweaver: ...Miscellanous fluids?
[NOTE: The following comments are actual comments from the surviving witnesses of the Disqus Downtime of March 22, 2016. You can hear the desperation and utter despair in their voices. Viewer discretion is advised.]
Dreamweaver: I wonder what kind of memes would exist?
Dreamweaver: But pee in a bottle, in case you get thristy.
No one said living without Disqus is easy.
Dreamweaver: Confirmed: all a part of Minecraft's plan!
Dreamweaver: Dammit bigboss0110, WHAT'S THE ANSWER!?
Dreamweaver: There's that damn echo again.
Dreamweaver: Don't give Donald Trump any ideas!
He has money, he could make that happen!
And that's it for this edition, folks! As I mentioned before, I'm going to try to finally get caught up on Comments of the Week, so hopefully you'll see it posted later today. But for that to happen, you all need to get the fuck out of this blog post!
Move it! I'm talking to YOU, fat ass!