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Destructoid forums Werewolf Game 9: a recap (part 2)


This is the second part in the epic retelling of Werewolf Game 9 from the Destructoid forums. If you missed it, you can see Part 1 here. Header image by ZombiePlatypus. You can click it for a larger version.

Planning Phase 7 - Thunder Mountain

Another RED structure needed a bit of old fashioned destruction, at the peak of the ominously named Thunder Mountain, where the storm raged nonstop for months on end. Could the BLU team continue its success and destroy the RED asset at Thunder Mountain?

Mission begins in sixty seconds!

The group had learned nothing new from the previous mission. Tarvu still accused Bizarro; Bizarro accused Tarvu. One of them was certain to be a RED Spy, but the others couldn't be sure which it is (or whether it is both). With Tarvu in charge of the Squads, he assigned a fellow Demoman to look after Bizarro.

Mission begins in ten seconds!

If Tarvu was telling the truth, then he had just sent a teammate to spend the mission alone with a traitor. It was either the safest place, or the most dangerous one.

Mission begins in five, four, three, two, one...

Action Phase 7

Light flashed, and thunder rumbled over Thunder Mountain. Like Gold Rush and Dust Bowl, there were three stages that the BLU team had to surpass in order to destroy RED's tower at the top of the mountain. Squad Abed would take the first stage, which was literally an uphill battle, with slopes that would push the bomb cart backward if nobody was actively moving it forward. As before, Heavies djnealb and Mr 3man would stick by the cart, laying down sustained fire on any RED mercenaries foolish enough to come close to the cart. Scout Artful-dodgeR would not push with the Heavies; he would stay a few steps ahead, letting the Squad know what was in store for them. Sniper Mighty Hatman and Engineer Muckfoot would move around the left flank, taking up position in the high windows overlooking the final point.

As the mission began, the Artful-dodgeR ran ahead, then came back to report to the Heavies pushing the cart. He had seen a RED Pyro waiting to ambush the cart at the top of the first slope, and a RED Soldier charging toward the BLU base. Artful-dodgeR took over pushing the cart while Heavies djnealb and Mr 3man rode on top of it. "Screamin' eagles!" they heard from the sky, as the RED Soldier bounded down toward them with shovel in hand. The two Heavies sidestepped--djnealb to the left and Mr 3man to the right. The RED Soldier landed directly on top of the bomb cart, and just before he was going to smash Artful-dodgeR with his shovel, he was caught in a fully automatic crossfire between the two Heavies. They hopped back on the cart and stood back to back while Artful-dodgeR pushed them up the hill. Before reaching the top, they both opened fire, and after passing a wall, djnealb was able to surprise their would-be ambusher with a face full of bullets. Meanwhile, Muckfoot and Mighty Hatman were able to sneak to the left and climb to the second floor of the building overlooking their destination. Mighty Hatman took to the windows, placing a bullet into the skull of anybody exiting the RED safe room. A RED Demoman and a RED Soldier exited simultaneously, and while Mighty Hatman was able to pierce the Soldier's helmet, the Demoman had time to charge forward, lobbing a few grenades up at the window, before entering the first floor of the building. He climbed the stairs, expecting to make quick work of the cowardly Sniper, but as he turned a corner, he was met with Muckfoot's sentry guarding Mighty Hatman's back, giving him only a split second to regret his confidence before he exploded into many tiny bits. The cart-pushers arrived at the scene with no more resistance, passing the bomb onto the second stage.

The second stage of Thunder Mountain was less arduous than the first, with a bridge to cross, and tunnel to pass, and finally a downhill section that the cart could ride to its destination. Demoman Tarvu would ride the cart, lobbing an endless supply of grenades toward the REDs, while Pyro Austin_SJ would push the cart and watch for any flankers. Snipers Scroll and usedtabe would push ahead, trying to take up an elevated position near the RED safe house. With medical supplies in the bomb cart, Medic ClownBaby decided to go with the Snipers to make sure they weren't harmed.

The gates opened, and the BLU Squad saw a sentry planted directly on the bridge they needed to cross. Tarvu and Austin_SJ were pinned down near the cart, but usedtabe was able to pop the attending Engineer's head from the far right. Afterward, the Snipers took turns taking potshots at the sentry until it was filled with one too many holes to function properly. Scroll and usedtabe ran forward with ClownBaby in tow while Tarvu and Austin_SJ manned the cart. Austin_SJ sensed a presence nearby, and he throttled his flamethrower at seemingly nothing when the air itself appeared to catch fire. The cloaked RED (NPC) Spy cried out, and was able to dunk himself in the river before the burns ended his life, but Tarvu caught him with a grenade just as he was coming from the river, separating his limbs from his torso in a gruesome explosion. The two Snipers met some resistance on their way to the nest above the cart's destination; apparently the RED mercenaries had learned from last time. In their way stood a pair of Heavies, miniguns spinning in anticipation. The quarters were too close for their rifles, so the two Snipers gazed into each other's eyes, nodded, and ran forward, each brandishing his kukri. ClownBaby activated his ‹bercharge, and expertly kept both Snipers protected from the flurry of bullets while they hacked at the Heavies until the cuts were so deep and the blood loss so severe that they fell to the ground. After that, it was a restful trek for the cart to its destination. With two Snipers covering the battlefield, Austin_SJ and Tarvu easily pushed the cart down the hill and onto the third stage.

The third stage was at the peak of Thunder Mountain, with the RED war asset in the center of the arena. The cart's tracks spiraled around it, ever upward. Once again, the third Squad was paltry compared to the other two, but at least this time Medic Bizarro had the backup of Demoman BlackSunEmpire. Their plan was the only one that made sense: Bizarro would keep BlackSunEmpire healed while they took on whatever was thrown their way. Hopefully the RED forces were thin enough that their survival was still a possibility.

After the gates opened, the duo saw their only opposition: a single RED Demoman brandishing a longsword and a shield rather than the usual grenade launchers. This RED Demoman had taken the heads of many BLU mercenaries in the past, and it made him extremely strong and fast. Immediately out of the gates, he charged them and knocked Bizarro backward with his shield bash. Just before swinging at Bizarro's head, BlackSunEmpire set off a single sticky bomb at the RED Demoman's feet, launching him twenty feet away. Though it may have saved Bizarro's life, it did little damage to the well armored Demoknight, who ran toward the BLUs, furious that he was denied his Medic head. Bizarro activated his ‹bercharge just before the sword contacted BlackSunEmpire's neck, protecting him from the blow. The ‹bercharge lasted long enough for BlackSunEmpire to drop a handful of sticky bombs at his feet, exploding him to the top of the tower in the center of the battlefield, while sending shrapnel at the RED Demoman and leaving Bizarro alone with him. Bizarro unholstered his syringe gun, and planted a few syringes into the RED Demoman's shield as he charged and swung his Eyelander sword. Bizarro dodged out of the way at the last moment, deftly slicing the RED Demoman's left Achilles tendon with his bonesaw. In great pain but not yet beaten, the RED Demoman bashed Bizarro with his shield, knocking him to the groudn with stars in his eyes. As the RED Demoman brought his sword up for the killing blow, he didn't hear BlackSunEmpire swoop down from the tower, broken whiskey bottle in hand. In a flash, BlackSunEmpire landed on the RED Demoman, caught him in a choke hold, and scraped the broken glass across his trachea. Blood oozed out of the wound while the RED Demoman stumbled, choking, to his death. The BLU Medic-Demoman Squad watched the man die, then safely delivered the bomb to its destination. Another RED war asset was destroyed.

Nobody was killed.

Planning Phase 8 - Cold Front

In the frozen northern region of Cold Front, the RED mercenaries had yet another building that would vaguely help the war effort between the two factions. BLU would rather hold this than destroy it, so they sent the mercenaries to take the RED building, after having so many successes in merely destroying them.

Mission begins in ten seconds!

Nothing happened.

Mission begins in five, four, three, two, one!

Action Phase 8

Cold Front is a frozen wasteland, but the battle would be similar to that at the Granary. The first Squad would take the central cabin, the second Squad would move forward to take the garage, and the third Squad would make the final push to the RED control room.

As the central cabin would likely have the most RED resistance, and it was the most open, the BLU Squad would send in Heavies djnealb and Mr 3man to form a wall, while Sniper Mighty Hatman, Scout Artful-dodgeR, and Engineer Muckfoot would follow behind, ready to unleash an attack when more firepower was needed.

The mission began, and the slow-moving wall of metal and meat pushed forward to the cabin. There they met two RED Scouts who had attempted to use their speed to take the cabin before BLU would have a chance. Miniguns whirred into action, and despite their best attempts to dodge, the RED Scouts were cut in half by the spray of lead. A RED Pyro appeared suddenly and set the two BLU Heavies on fire, causing them to panic and break the phalanx. Unfortunately for the RED Pyro, as the wall parted, it gave Mighty Hatman just the opening he was waiting for, firing a single shot from his rifle into the RED Pyro's mask. Muckfoot set up a dispenser on the control point to replenish the Heavies' ammunition and heal their burns, and just in time, as a RED Soldier came bounding toward the cabin, hitting Mr 3man with a rocket square in his chest. Mr 3man grabbed a shot of painkiller while Artful-dodgeR jumped over Mr 3man's head and met the Soldier with a point blank scattergun shot to the face. The cabin belonged to BLU.

The garage offered much more cover than the cabin, which would be a double-edged sword for the BLU team. Not only would they be safer from enemy fire once they entered, but also would the RED team be protected from BLU's advance. Pyro Austin_SJ and Demoman Tarvu would be first to enter, the former to the left and the latter to the right. Snipers Scroll and usedtabe would each follow behind either Austin_SJ or Tarvu, and Medic ClownBaby would be on hand to tend to any wounds.

Austin_SJ and Tarvu charged into their respective doors, through the garage in order to flush out any hidden RED mercenaries. When Scroll and usedtabe entered, the first two BLUs were already out of sight, and ClownBaby was still behind them, waiting to be called upon. Scroll caught the sight of a RED Sniper across the way, and assuming his brother in arms would follow suit if he had a target, Scroll fired a shot that pierced the RED Sniper's skull. No shot came from usedtabe's position, so presumably he didn't have a target, or else he had missed Scroll's cue. Or--and Scroll perished the thought--something may have become of his fellow Sniper. Before he had time to wonder, he felt a presence behind him, but not quickly enough, as the man behind him reach around his neck, and opened it with his knife from one side to the other, before redisguising himself in his BLU uniform. Moments later, there were three simultaneous calls for a Medic, one each from Tarvu, Austin_SJ, and usedtabe. They had been ambushed, caught in a melee, and beaten up pretty badly. As ClownBaby rushed to their aid, he was able to heal the three of them, but then realized that Scroll was missing. Upon discovering the body, BLU decided that the attack on the RED control room would have to wait another day, and usedtabe wept a single tear for his fallen brother.

Scroll was killed.

Planning Phase 9 - Cold Front again

The BLU team was getting antsy again. Why wouldn't the REDs just show themselves and fight like men? They threatened Austin_SJ a bit, shook the tree to see what would fall out. In the end, they were just shaking.

Mission begins in sixty seconds!

After several days of inaction, something spurred the BLU team all at once to turn their suspicions on Pyro Austin_SJ. After shining the spotlight on him, the team decided that he could live, for at least a little while.

Mission begins in ten seconds!

Scout Artful-dodgeR assigned the Squads for this mission, so hopefully they could take Cold Front where they had failed previously.

Misson begins in five, four, three, two, one...

Action Phase 9

For their second try at taking the control room at Cold Front, Team Leader Artful-dodgeR decided to have the largest force attack up front, leaving smaller strike teams for the second and third areas. Scout Artful-dodgeR would run ahead and begin capturing the central cabin before anybody else could. He would get backup from Demoman BlackSunEmpire and Engineer Muckfoot first, while Sniper Mighty Hatman would perch on the hill to the right of the cabin. Heavies Mr 3man and djnealb would bring up the rear, simply by virtue of being the slowest of the group.

As the mission begin, the first Squad charged forward, demoralized as they were from the previous defeat. Artful-dodgeR was the first to reach the central cabin, but he was met by a RED Scout who had the same idea. The two Scouts eyed each other, then began their dance of scatterguns and double jumps. Each took small wounds, but their speed made it impossible for either to land a good hit on the other. "Kaboom!" they heard, from behind Artful-dodgeR, as BlackSunEmpire launched himself with one of his own explosions, landing directly on top of the RED Scout, pinning him to the ground before stabbing him in the gut with a broken bottle of whiskey. Muckfoot showed up shortly afterward, dropping a mini-sentry and immediately setting up a dispenser to help heal Artful-dodgeR's and BlackSunEmpire's (self-inflicted) wounds. A RED Engineer appeared, and started building his own sentry gun, though his was full-sized. Artful-dodgeR and Muckfoot simultaneously had the same thought; they each unholstered their pistols and destroyed the sentry gun from outside of its range while the RED Engineer ran out of metal to repair it. After it was destroyed, the RED Engineer turned to run back to his base, and he would have made it, had Mighty Hatman not caught him from afar with a high velocity chunk of lead to his back. The RED Engineer flopped over, painting the snow red with his blood, which his teammates used as their own red carpet. A flood of RED mercenaries showed up: Soldiers, Demoman, and even a few Heavies. Luckily, djnealb and Mr 3man were on site, huddled around Muckfoot's dispenser, which kept them well stocked and healthy while they laid down an impenetrable barrage that tore the REDs apart, leaving nothing but meat and blood on the fresh snow. The central cabin was secure.

The second strike team was made up of Pyro Austin_SJ, Medic ClownBaby, and Sniper usedtabe. Austin_SJ would lead the charge with ClownBaby following, keeping him healthy, and usedtabe covering them from any would-be flankers.

The first two BLU mercenaries entered the garage, where they found a host of REDs ripe for the burning. Demomen, Scouts, and Snipers attempted to retreat, but were caught in the flames and succumbed to the pain before they could find their burn medications. A RED (NPC) Spy materialized behind ClownBaby, and as he raised up his hand to plunge the knife into the BLU Medic's back, a shot rang out, tearing a hole through the RED (NPC) Spy's hand, knocking it to the floor. He spun around, pistol raised in his non-dominant hand, just in time to see the glint from usedtabe's scope before a second bullet caught him in the teeth and exited out the back of his head. The garage was secure.

The last team was made of two BLUs who each knew he could not trust the other. Tarvu knew it was Bizarro who had killed ZombiePlatypus, and Bizarro knew it was Tarvu who had done it. Knowing they could not work together, they each took their own path to the RED control room.

Tarvu was met at the left entrance to the control room by a RED Engineer, with a fully upgraded sentry gun in front of him and a dispenser behind. Though he was caught by surprise and was hit by the first volley of rockets from the sentry, the force knocked him back, out of the sentry's line of sight. Tarvu surveyed the room, calculated angles and let a few bouncy grenades fly into the control room. They ricocheted off the weapons locker, then off the near wall, before bouncing on the ground once and landing directly at the RED Engineer's feet. He had enough time to widen his eyes and shout before his sentry, his dispenser, and he were all destroyed at once. Bizarro was luckily met by a RED Medic on the right entrance to the control room. Knowing he would be alone for this mission, Bizarro had traded out the weak syringe gun for a crossbow--though it only held a single round at a time, it would do more damage than the syringes would. His aim was true, hitting the RED Medic square between the eyes, though the enemy Medic still stood. With no time to reload, Bizarro took up his bonesaw, tackling the RED Medic before using it to separate his head from his torso. Tarvu and Bizarro met in the control room, staring each other down. Each had half expected to end this mission with a knife in his back, but upon seeing his known enemy in the RED control room, both realized that the opportunity for that must have passed. They went on to secure the control room, though neither took his eyes off the other while they did it.

Nobody was killed.

Planning Phase 10 - Upward

The RED team was growing weary of losing key locations to the BLU team, and decided to strike back, in the same manner that the BLUs had destroyed Gold Rush and Thunder Mountain. The BLU team had a mountain base of their own at Upward, and the REDs would push a bomb cart to its center to destroy it.

Mission begins in sixty seconds!

The BLU team knew that either Tarvu or Bizarro was a dirty RED Spy, and their only way to know for sure would be to kill one. They executed Tarvu at his request, and found Bizarro to be the traitor among them.

Mission begins in ten seconds!

ClownBaby was Team Leader, and he decided to maintain the same Squads as previously, less Tarvu in Squad Child's Play. The first two Squads were actually going to be defending Upward; Bizarro would be locked in the safe room, unable to affect the battle one way or another.

Mission begins in five, four, three, two, one...

Action Phase 10

Upward was BLU's mountaintop reconnaissance base, and RED knew that BLU would be crippled if it were destroyed. The rails for the bomb cart started on one side of the mountain, snaked around the outside in a circuit, before entering the base on the other side. With so much ground to cover and only two active Squads remaining, Squad Armageddon would have to spread out over the first few areas, while Squad Back to the Future would hunker down inside the base as the last defense, with Bizarro manning the third "Squad," locked up inside BLU's safe room.

Heavy djnealb would ambush the RED team just as they exited the gates. Engineer Muckfoot would assist with a wrangled sentry from atop the lean-to in the distance. Around the first bend, Demoman BlackSunEmpire would set up a sticky mine trap on the rails as they went underground. Mighty Hatman would perch on the shed overlooking the tunnel exit, ready to pop the heads of any who would bring the cart through. Scout Artful-dodgeR would set up near the cliffside bridge, knocking any REDs off the mountain with his Force-a-Nature. Mr 3man would be the last line of defense before the central base, readying around a corner with minigun spinning.

Before the mission began, everybody went to his place. As Mighty Hatman was adjusting his scopes and setting down his piss jars, he felt the sting of steel separating his fourth and fifth vertebrae. As he slumped to the ground, his last thoughts were of the huge tactical opening in BLU's defenses; there was no way they would hold any sort of RED force without him there to hold his choke point.

As the mission began, a few RED Scouts ran to the bomb cart, eager to push it forward. From their right, djnealb opened fire, laying down a curtain of lead that left the Scouts a bloody mess. Out of nowhere, a RED Pyro turned the corner and airblasted djnealb backward off the mountain. Luckily, he landed on a ledge ten feet down from the top; he was out of the fight, but he was still alive. From a distance, Muckfoot wrangled his sentry into firing a nonstop barrage at the Pyro that knocked djnealb off the mountain. Before long, the Pyro was reduced to nothing, but the gunfire kept Muckfoot from hearing the footsteps of a RED (NPC) Spy behind him, disguised as Muckfoot himself. The RED (NPC) Spy deftly attached a sapper to Muckfoot's sentry and dispenser, but just as he raised the knife, Muckfoot spun around and filled him with a shotgun blast or six. Though his attacker was killed, his sentry was destroyed, and Muckfoot had no choice but to retreat. In the tunnel, BlackSunEmpire nearly detonated his sticky mines upon seeing Muckfoot coming, but he stayed his hand at the last moment. It was a lucky thing he did, because tailing Muckfoot was a group of three RED mercenaries, who pushed the bomb cart right into BlackSunEmpire's trap. As the RED Soldier, Heavy, and Scout exploded, BlackSunEmpire began setting up another round of mines, but before he could, a second RED Scout appeared next to him, smashing him over the head with a baseball bat before chasing down Muckfoot to do the same. The mine cart was pushed out of the tunnel by a pair of RED Heavy-Medic combos. Had Mighty Hatman been there, he could have easily cut the Medics down, but his motionless body did nothing to stop the incoming REDs. As they made their way to the cliffside bridge, Artful-dodgeR was able to ambush one Heavy-Medic pairing and knock them straight off the side of the cliff. The second pair was fortunate enough to be ready, firing in Artful-dodgeR's direction before he could get close enough to them. After taking a few bullets to the gut, he decided to retreat and hope his teammates could finish the job. Unfortunately for BLU, RED saw more reinforcements show up to push the cart. There was one of each class, all helping to move the cart forward. Mr 3man did what he could around the last corner, taking out the Medic, Scout, and Pyro, but there were too many, and he was forced to retreat as well.

Squad Back to the Future had minimal defenses set up inside the base, with only Pyro Austin_SJ waiting to ambush the entrance, Sniper usedtabe guarding from atop the catwalk, and Medic ClownBaby running between the two, keeping them healed. When Mr 3man and Artful-dodgeR came back in, ClownBaby went to tend to their wounds, leaving usedtabe and Austin_SJ on their own against a force too great for them to hold back. Though they each racked up a kill or two, they too were forced to retreat into the safe room, letting the REDs push the cart straight into the maw of the mountain. Afterward, the rest of the BLUs went to collect their wounded and incapacitated, and only then did they learn why the REDs were able to break through the tunnel so easily. Mighty Hatman lay on the ground, blood slowly trickling out of the wound in his back...

Mighty Hatman was killed.

Planning Phase 11 - Harvest

Tensions were running high among BLU team. They knew Bizarro was a RED Spy, and they knew one of his teammates was among ClownBaby, usedtabe, and Austin_SJ. Action had to be taken, and soon. For the second time, BLU team put Austin on trial. He pleaded the same as last time, asserting that his death would bring them no closer to the truth than they were. It was not convincing enough. BLU team stripped him of his fireproof suit, leaving only his mask and heart boxers, before they took ProlificDream's old flamethrower and roasted him with it.

As the BLU Pyro burned, he was transformed before their eyes, showing his true nature as a RED Spy.

Austin_SJ was killed. He was a RED Spy.

Mission begins in sixty seconds!

Tensions were running high, and the BLU team really had to take out a RED Spy soon, or else they would be reduced to nothing. Austin_SJ was put on trial for a second time, but the votes were no longer in his favor. The BLU team condemned him to die, and he was discovered to be a RED Spy.

Mission begins in ten seconds!

Artful-dodgeR decided that their numbers were getting to be too few, and formed two strike teams for the upcoming mission. Hopefully it would be a successful one.

Mission begins in five, four, three, two, one...

Action Phase 11

In the middle of Harvest was a small barn that housed controls for an orbital strike, and on either side of the barn was a ranch house, one for RED and one for BLU. If BLU could hold the central barn for enough time, they could call down the orbital strike and destroy REDs stronghold at Harvest. Squad Boy would hang back in their house to provide cover fire, while Squad Astro would storm the barn and attempt to hold it.

Squad Boy had the known traitor Medic Bizarro along with the known loyalists Medic ClownBaby and Sniper usedtabe. Given their statuses, ClownBaby and usedtabe would hang back in the house, keeping an eye on the prisoner Bizarro so he could do no harm. That left Engineer Muckfoot to set up a defense turret and Demoman BlackSunEmpire to rain grenades on the incoming REDs, both from the roof of the house.

When the sirens rang out, the five mercenaries made their way to the second floor of the house. ClownBaby and usedtabe held Bizarro down and stuffed an ammo box in his mouth, while Muckfoot and BlackSunEmpire hopped out the nearby windows to set up on the roof. Muckfoot quickly put up a sentry and began to upgrade it, while BlackSunEmpire haphazardly lobbed grenades over the central barn to the REDs' side. With equal parts luck and skill, he caught an enemy Scout directly in the chest, exploding him to dozens of moist RED pieces. Muckfoot's sentry was fully upgraded by this time, and he wrangled it to shoot across the map at a RED Sniper who was just about to take a shot at BlackSunEmpire. Squad Astro was running beneath Squad Boy at this point, about to meet a RED Heavy-Medic combo in the middle. Muckfoot riddled the Heavy with sentry fire, but his Medic was hiding behind the barn and keeping the Heavy healthy. BlackSunEmpire lobbed a sticky grenade or four over the barn, detonated them, and left the Heavy defenseless against Muckfoot's sentry.

Squad Astro charged into the barn, with Heavies djnealb and Mr 3man each guarding one of the doors and Scout Artful-dodgeR capturing the point as quickly as he could. What seemed like a dozen RED mercenaries came charging into the barn only to be riddled with bullets from the Heavies' miniguns before the REDs wised up. From out of nowhere, two RED Demomen fell in through the gaping hole in the ceiling, after having sticky jumped from their base all the way to the center. Both Heavies turned inward, but held their fire, not wanting to catch Artful-dodgeR or each other in the crossfire. Seeing that he'd have to deal with the RED Demomen, Artful-dodgeR beaned one with his baseball to stun him, then beat the other to death with his bat. When the second Demoman finally came to his senses again, he was staring down the barrel of Artful-dodgeR's scattergun, with just enough time to close his good eye before the blast took off his head. The barn was secured, and the orbital strike came down fiercely on the RED base.

Nobody was killed at Harvest.

Planning Phase 12 - Nucleus

The infighting among BLU team was reaching a peak. Even though they successfully caught a RED the day before, they were still out for blood. Engineer Muckfoot was put on trial for the crime of consorting with Austin_SJ, a known RED Spy. Despite his words on the chopping block, literally every other person wanted to see him bleed. They tied him up in front of his own level 3 sentry, stole his Wrangler, and pointed it at his hardhat. With the press of a button, a flurry of bullets and rockets flew toward Muckfoot, reducing him to a puddle on the sand.

Muckfoot was killed.

Mission begins in ten seconds!

The BLU team was caught unawares by the announcement; in the commotion from Muckfoot's execution, they must have missed that the mission was starting soon. Without any time to form Squads or strategy, the BLU team got ready to rush onto the field, all as one.

Mission begins in five, four, three, two, one...

Action Phase 12

This was it. Nucleus was the final RED stronghold for BLU to take. Over a seemingly bottomless pit was the one capture point to rule them all. If BLU could take this point, they would be able to turn the last of REDs defenses against them, wiping them off the face of the planet. With their prisoner Medic Bizarro in tow, the remaining BLU mercenaries all made a charge at the point together.

Heavies djnealb and Mr 3man led with a nonstop barrage of bullets, each kept overhealed by Medic ClownBaby. Sniper usedtabe and Scout Artful-dodgeR ran in with a jar of piss and a can of soda--and usedtabe deftly switched the two without Artful-dodgeR noticing just for kicks. Demoman BlackSunEmpire brought up the rear with "Medic" Bizarro in cuffs. When they all arrived at the nucleus, they found... nothing. No RED opposition. Nobody left to fight. They had killed all of the REDs. Well, all but one.

Realizing that they may have just stumbled into a trap, they all turned to Bizarro, to try and divine what they had been led into. Just then, the Medic disappear from sight, as the handcuffs dropped to the floor with a clatter. Reappearing on the bridge in front of them was a man with a RED pinstripe suit and a mask. "I'm sorry brothers," he said to nobody and everybody. "I have failed you."

And with that, he pulled a pocketknife out of his coat. Just as the BLU mercenaries were about to open fire on Bizarro, he took the knife to his own throat, opening a grim smile from ear to ear. As the blood spilled from his neck, he threw himself down the pit below the nucleus, never to be seen again.
Weeks later, a RED child was crying. They had come in the night, and murdered his family. His father, his mother, and even his baby sister had been bloodied until they were unrecognizable. He had only survived because he was "playing Spy" as children are wont to do, dressing up as their evil oppressers. When the BLUs found him sleeping in BLU clothing, they spared him, although the fire in his heart burned RED. The BLUs had taken over their homeland and enslaved and/or raped and/or murdered his people. Some day, he would exact his revenge. But that day was not today.

Game over, BLU wins!

Muckfoot and Bizarro were both RED Spies.
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Darren Nakamura   
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About Darren Nakamuraone of us since 2:29 AM on 11.06.2006

Darren is a scientist during the day. He has been a Destructoid community member since 2006, joining the front page as a contributor in 2011.

While he enjoys shooters, RPGs, platformers, strategy, and rhythm games, he takes particular interest in independent games. He produced the Zero Cool Podcast for about four years, and he plays board games quite a bit when he can find willing companions.

FULL DISCLOSURE: Darren Nakamura knows several people in the video game industry, most of whom are Destructoid alumni. These include:

Anthony Burch, former writer for Gearbox Software
Ashly Burch, notable voice actor
Nick Chester, publicist for Harmonix Music Systems
Chad Concelmo, writer for Golin Harris
Aaron Linde, writer for Gearbox Software
Jayson Napolitano, publicist for Scarlet Moon Productions
Brad Nicholson, former publicist for Uber Entertainment
Alex Ryan, publicist for Kalypso Media
Jim Sterling, notable voice actor

Darren backs a lot of Kickstarter campaigns! If you want to see what he has backed, you can go here. If he ever reviews a game that he backed, that will be explicitly disclosed in the review.

Darren invested in Psychonauts 2 on Fig.
Xbox LIVE:Dexter345
PSN ID:Dexter345
Steam ID:http://steamcommunity.com/profil
Mii code:1257 7687 3747 6405


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