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LONG BLOG

Cblogs of 9/3/09 + Strykisms

   0


Another relatively slow week, but there's a good reason for it this time. I think you all know what it is. Unfortunately, I couldn't make it to PAX despite promising myself I would all year. You know how it is. Things happen. Plans change. Money goes down the fucking toilet. Things of that nature. So yeah, I'm bummed. If the recaps today don't exude my usual charm and wit, that's why.

But wait! Next week there is going to be a PAX pity party up in Orlando and I. Am. There. I'm going to bring the ingredients to make this heart-attack-on-a-plate. It'll be righteous. It'll be better than PAX! With blackjack! And hookers!

Shifting gears, I went to Waldenbooks today and sat down by the graphic novels section for a couple hours, just enjoying the peace and quiet. I read some Marvel Zombies. It was either when a mentally broken Reed Richards intentionally infected the rest of the Fantastic Four and allowed himself to be bitten by them because he felt that zombification was the next step in human evolution OR when a zombified Giant-Man kept a sedated Black Panther alive for weeks tied to an operating table, sawing off limbs every few days in order to feed at a carefully rationed pace that I thought to myself, "Yessir. This is Disney material right here."




*- Electro Lemon made a doohickey... a thingamajig... a widget... a whatchamacallit.

*- Once this Ratchet & Clank script is finished, I'm rereading the whole thing from start to finish.

*- Valve is trolling. The comic at the bottom positively kills!

*- SuitcoatAvenger's interpretaion of Sagat is fuckin' Ace Hardware.


S- Freefall talks about the best squads in gaming. Today, it's Delta Squad from Star Wars: Republic Commando.
S- altered has finished Pathologic. One hundred twenty hours? Good God, man.
S- Oh Lord! A new series about random shit on Japanese-Bobtail's desk! Ha ha ha!
S- Canti-sama's Overlooked Thursday covers Folklore today.
M- Wry Guy implores us to stay on the straight and narrow.
M- This musing about nOObs by new guy HuttyLoca could have easily gone in nasty direction, but thankfully it's on the level.
M- Electrium is the troll police. Spit that gum out! Don't step on the grass! No jaywalking!


C- "Friends of the PAXless." F.O.P. Fops. What's YOUR FOP name? Only FOPs may enter! FOPs! Foppity floppity flop!


PAX- TheCleaningGuy will be at PAX wearing the best T-shirt EVAR.
PAX- prolifikstudio will be at PAX... and here's a screenshot from his secret game that no one knows what the hell is about.
PAX- Good times were had at thepelkuslives's pre-PAX party.
S- Kylius is moving in with his girlfriend and needs Xbox Live to stay sane. Won't you help him?
S- sstryker20 stands up to those mean ol' bullies picking on poor wittle Jim Sterling.
C- madninja is gonna ride the retro rollercoaster but needs your help! It's up to YOU!
B- So I'm guessing the Persona fanboy had a birthday or something. I think. I could be mistaken.
R- So, like, did I miss something? unstoppablejuggernaut just went POOF.


N- Europe sank into the ocean, so no releases this week. Maybe. Double-check your pre-orders.
V- Oh snap. Pokémon game marathon. Grab some popcorn and Skittles.
V- New No More Heroes 2 trailer. Side jobs in 8-bit. Spooge. Wipe clean. Will watch again.
R- Buy Metroid Prime Trilogy. Buy Metroid Prime Trilogy. Did you buy it yet? Buy Metroid Prime Trilogy.
T- British conspiracy? Bat Boy lives in Essex? Princess Di made a sex tape two days before her death?
T- DimXD2077 plays Final Fantasy X around the campfire with some buddies.
T- Kaaru1990 pours one out for JRPGs as he remembers them.
T- wanderingpixel can totally do a better Arkham Asylum ending.
T- While discussing the new PlayStation slogan, Crunshii announced his engagement to Sony. I'm just playin'.
D- Oooooooh! So THIS is what prolifikstudio's game is all about!


A- Jack Maverick sketched a lovely Shanoa from Castlevania: Order of Ecclesia.
M- snoogans775 wrote a Silent Hill 2 tribute song.
M- The music in the Half-Life 2 mod NEOTOKYO is some hot shit.
S- Xymplx finished his custom trackball. Neato!


R- NEEEEERRRRRRRD!
R- DimXD2077 is going to make a movie. Hot stuff.


F- I'm sorry you lost your imaginary trinkets, but sometimes shit happens when you engage in morally ambiguous practices.
F- Absolutely scrumptious.
F- Go sit in your ivory tower.
F- How in the H-E-double toothpicks does this guy keep getting new accounts!?
F- Fine dining. Five stars.


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FPoTD
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About CblogRecapsone of us since 11:27 PM on 07.02.2008

About Cblog Recaps

Schedule:
Mondays - Lord Spencer
Tuesdays - Larxinostic
Wednesdays - DeadMoon
Thursdays -OrochiLeona
Fridays - Gamemaniac3434
Saturdays - AmnaUmen
Sundays - Riobux

Reserve Recappers:
Gajknight
LinkSlayer64
ShadeOfLight
Torchman
TheBlondeBass
Hypno Coffin

Current "Bloggers Wanted" assignment
Fake it until you make it

This month's bloggers wanted prompt is something we stole. You see, by stealing this idea, you have no idea how truly inept I actually am. By pretending to know what I'm doing, I have clearly used my ill-gotten status to meet such big-time celebrities as Darlington Woolie "Pie Stealer" Madden or Sara from [insert pixel indie game studio here].

This month's bloggers wanted was inspired by the internal enjoyment we had at reading TheBlondeBass' promoted blog on faking conversational anime knowledge. And now it seems as good a time as ever to pretend to know what's going on since the new Fate/Grand Order game launched and qtoid is talking about it. I am a big fan of the character design of Artoria in the blue dress, or Artoria in the suit, or Artoria in the red dress. But seriously, we enjoyed the format so much that we want to ask the community for their own ideas at faking it at all sorts of things.

But this prompt is not just for anime, of course. The video game industry is fractured with all sorts of niche interests that only an insane rich person with no job could realistically know everything about. This month's bloggers wanted is about taking a subject you want to offer advice on faking knowledge about in order to help the greater community, for better or for worse. If this doesn't sound serious, don't worry, you're not supposed to take it seriously. You don't have to be an expert in whatever you talk about any more than Bass is an expert in anime.

I seriously don't know if that was a compliment or an insult.

Offer advice on anything you can expand your mind on. Want to help people get into character action games? The more Ss you put into its grading system, the cooler it is! Want to convince people to get into the Neptunia series? Just say "Nep-Nep!" and you're all set to convince people of your technical knowledge! Can you get someone into RTS game by just talking about your APM? Someone's bound to believe some random technical jargon you made up!

To get started, start a blog and title it "Faking it: [your blog title here]." Then you can be as serious or facetious as you want as you provide advice on any number of things: learning how to play fighting games, trying a long-running franchise you've probably neglected, or even explaining a game's timeline. Heck, you can probably seriously try on that last one and we still wouldn't believe you.

Good luck this month. Only true cowards rely on facts. Real heroes pretend to know what they're doing!



Current Community Contests
PREPARE TO CONTEST - The Master Gaming List Birthday Giveaway!

Good Morning/Evening/Yesterday, my Friends/Robots/INSERT WAIFU HERE,

More or less a week ago, the Master Gaming List turned one year old. I had a speech prepared, but the blog editor ate it four or five times over the last few days, so I'm kind of winging it now.

Despite all of the threatening and cajoling I initially made to get you all on the list, I never imagined I'd still be adding names a year later (and by "you all", I mostly mean GajKnight). It was kind of a ridiculous undertaking at first, trying to make a semi-permanent, easily-updatable list of everyone's contact info. I'm not even sure what everyone was being hyped over last year that got me to do this.

That said, I'm glad it came together, and this list has lead to many other things for me on Destructoid; whether it was me becoming our laziest, cuddliest Community Manager, or our laziest, cuddliest Reviews-type-person, I have always enjoyed the full love and support of this community.

In thanks, and with the assistance of quite a few others, I've gathered up a number of game keys to give away to you all.

The Contest

I've never run a contest before, so let's keep things simple. Write me a haiku about your favorite game.

Rules

1. The haiku must not include the title of the game.

2. I will accept any other form of structured poetry if you are unable to haiku but can iambic pantameter (you monster).

3. Please state what key you are going for, and a backup if that one is taken (admittedly, it's quantity over variety here)

4. The tentative end date of the contest will be August 13th, and will be bumped at least once during that time.

Available Keys

-Stellaris
-Aporia: Beyond The Valley (Multiple Keys)
-The Witness
-Citadel: Forged With Fire (Multiple Keys)
-Armello
-Undertale
-ABZU

Thank you to all 282 of you who have made the Master List a successful project over the past year! I will continue updating it into the forseeable future.


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