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LONG BLOG

C blogs of 6-14-10 and Qalamarisms

   0


So I understand there's some kind of big board game and toy show going on in Los Angeles, is that right? Bringing back classics, I guess. I heard a lot about Triple-E and it seems like everyone's talking about K'Nex for some reason.

I am now the 300,000th person to make that K'nex joke. I think that means I win a pet monkey or something.

Anyway. Seems like everyone has an opinion about E3 so far. You know what they say about opinions, right? Yeah. To cheer myself up, I'm gonna link some absolutely great videos I found by following Grumpy Turtle on Twitter. Anonymouse and I both agree this first one is pretty much the best thing ever.




*-Dtoid Community discusses wasn't dead, it was only... napping. ErbilT is your new host for the welcome return of this feature.
*-S0lesurviv0r found a video that demonstrates a day in the life of everyone's favorite oiled-up red dude.
*- BulletMagnet's new series Magnet School kicks off by examining "ochige," or falling block Puyo-style games.
*-I like being able to highlight buried treasure on a high-volume day like today. BrainCandy wrote a great series of tips for anyone trying to get an art job in gaming.
*-Dexter's just brilliant and that's all there is to it. I am proud to have traded Pokemon with this man.


A-For those lucky enough to be in attendance at E3 this year, Paul Barber shares some words of wisdom, presumably gleaned from harsh experience.
A-InfinityBit's reflections on Microsoft's press conference had a bit more meat to them than the average reaction.
A-And Crunshii's reaction to Kinect features real-time melon manipulation and advanced nippomatic boob jubbling technology.
A-Lazaro Cruz wrote quite a nice article exploring what he's enjoyed about Red Dead Redemption.
M-Corduroy Turtle's Musing looks ahead to the big 3's announcements, and what's already been revealed.
M-TMillsap wrote a Musing about how different kinds of games can provoke different emotional states, and thus different kinds of escapism.
M-AngelEena wrote a bit about how gaming can help take the pain away.
P-Podsumaki re-recorded episode 7 this evening.


Bupkiss.

There's a lot more of these covering pretty much every major figure in popular entertainment. If you're ever bored, click through a few.


I-Vyncentcarver apparently trains male pikachu exclusively. Welcome to Destructoid.
I-And welcome to Phallus41, who claims to have massive strength.
I-Greetings CaptainNickbeard, who's blogging from E3 right now.



T- With the announcement that Dreamcast games will be making their way to current-gen hardware, Etirlita thought about which DC games might make the journey most gracefully.
T-Slade23 wrote some brief E3 predictions.
T-Squirrel Pope wonders where all these new accessories are supposed to go?
T-SAMA1984 thinks the Kinect and everything associated with it so far is a waste of time.
T- Gamebyte thinks 3d has more of a future than motion control.
T-Kytherno wonders what E3 secrets could possibly be left.
T-Covah thinks Ubisoft's conference sucked it up.
T-Crunshii wants Children of Eden inside him. I'd settle for a PS3 port of Rez HD.
T-Vyncentcarver's thoughts on E3 day 1.
T-Kinjiro plead for some originality.
T-SAMA1984 thinks motion control will ruin everything for everyone forever.
R-Covah reviewed Microsoft's opening E3 salvo.
R- Sean Ridgman has a few bones to pick with FIFA 10.
D-Manic Maverick may be working on a game. Possibly. Potentially. In theory.


M-Good LORD that's a lot of embedded Youtube videos. Check out Xzyliac's wishlist for Rock Band 3.



L-Bluerob used Pokemans to test Turing's theory.
R-With little else to do on a Sunday night, ww3pl calculated the size of the 360 slim in millimeters.
R-Guncannon predicts failure FAILURE for the Kinect.
R-Novakaine recently picked up FFXII again and... wow. I don't remember Fran looking like THAT.
V-Crunshii posted the first video of the Kinect in action.
V-Neveranything posted this. It isn't a Kinect video, but it's a clever fake.
V-Video of the new GoldenEye coming to the Wii this November.
?- ...huh?
C-I appreciate the theme of not judging a book by its cover, but this could use a little more fleshing out.
C-This was almost great, but it would have benefited tremendously from some pruning.
C-Linking videos does not necessarily make for a compelling blog. Next time, maybe write a bit more and link a bit less.


F- Copy
F-and
F-paste.
F-So unprofessional.
F-I don't know where this guy came from, but he's been posting the same damn comment in every thread all day and I'm tired of it.
F-Limericks must follow a set of rules to qualify as such. Chief among these are a triad of rhyming verses in the first, second, and fifth lines, and a pair of shorter verses with a different rhyme in the third and fourth lines. Limericks are generally written with a humorous bent, and have a reputation for bawdiness.
F-You again?



-(Qalamari)

FPoTD
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About CblogRecapsone of us since 11:27 PM on 07.02.2008

About Cblog Recaps

Schedule:
Mondays - Lord Spencer
Tuesdays - Larxinostic
Wednesdays - DeadMoon
Thursdays -OrochiLeona
Fridays - Gamemaniac3434
Saturdays - AmnaUmen
Sundays - Riobux

Reserve Recappers:
Gajknight
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TheBlondeBass
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Current "Bloggers Wanted" assignment
Fake it until you make it

This month's bloggers wanted prompt is something we stole. You see, by stealing this idea, you have no idea how truly inept I actually am. By pretending to know what I'm doing, I have clearly used my ill-gotten status to meet such big-time celebrities as Darlington Woolie "Pie Stealer" Madden or Sara from [insert pixel indie game studio here].

This month's bloggers wanted was inspired by the internal enjoyment we had at reading TheBlondeBass' promoted blog on faking conversational anime knowledge. And now it seems as good a time as ever to pretend to know what's going on since the new Fate/Grand Order game launched and qtoid is talking about it. I am a big fan of the character design of Artoria in the blue dress, or Artoria in the suit, or Artoria in the red dress. But seriously, we enjoyed the format so much that we want to ask the community for their own ideas at faking it at all sorts of things.

But this prompt is not just for anime, of course. The video game industry is fractured with all sorts of niche interests that only an insane rich person with no job could realistically know everything about. This month's bloggers wanted is about taking a subject you want to offer advice on faking knowledge about in order to help the greater community, for better or for worse. If this doesn't sound serious, don't worry, you're not supposed to take it seriously. You don't have to be an expert in whatever you talk about any more than Bass is an expert in anime.

I seriously don't know if that was a compliment or an insult.

Offer advice on anything you can expand your mind on. Want to help people get into character action games? The more Ss you put into its grading system, the cooler it is! Want to convince people to get into the Neptunia series? Just say "Nep-Nep!" and you're all set to convince people of your technical knowledge! Can you get someone into RTS game by just talking about your APM? Someone's bound to believe some random technical jargon you made up!

To get started, start a blog and title it "Faking it: [your blog title here]." Then you can be as serious or facetious as you want as you provide advice on any number of things: learning how to play fighting games, trying a long-running franchise you've probably neglected, or even explaining a game's timeline. Heck, you can probably seriously try on that last one and we still wouldn't believe you.

Good luck this month. Only true cowards rely on facts. Real heroes pretend to know what they're doing!



Current Community Contests
PREPARE TO CONTEST - The Master Gaming List Birthday Giveaway!

Good Morning/Evening/Yesterday, my Friends/Robots/INSERT WAIFU HERE,

More or less a week ago, the Master Gaming List turned one year old. I had a speech prepared, but the blog editor ate it four or five times over the last few days, so I'm kind of winging it now.

Despite all of the threatening and cajoling I initially made to get you all on the list, I never imagined I'd still be adding names a year later (and by "you all", I mostly mean GajKnight). It was kind of a ridiculous undertaking at first, trying to make a semi-permanent, easily-updatable list of everyone's contact info. I'm not even sure what everyone was being hyped over last year that got me to do this.

That said, I'm glad it came together, and this list has lead to many other things for me on Destructoid; whether it was me becoming our laziest, cuddliest Community Manager, or our laziest, cuddliest Reviews-type-person, I have always enjoyed the full love and support of this community.

In thanks, and with the assistance of quite a few others, I've gathered up a number of game keys to give away to you all.

The Contest

I've never run a contest before, so let's keep things simple. Write me a haiku about your favorite game.

Rules

1. The haiku must not include the title of the game.

2. I will accept any other form of structured poetry if you are unable to haiku but can iambic pantameter (you monster).

3. Please state what key you are going for, and a backup if that one is taken (admittedly, it's quantity over variety here)

4. The tentative end date of the contest will be August 13th, and will be bumped at least once during that time.

Available Keys

-Stellaris
-Aporia: Beyond The Valley (Multiple Keys)
-The Witness
-Citadel: Forged With Fire (Multiple Keys)
-Armello
-Undertale
-ABZU

Thank you to all 282 of you who have made the Master List a successful project over the past year! I will continue updating it into the forseeable future.


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