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LONG BLOG

C Blogs of 09/10/13 + Wrenchisms

   0




Oh stompy robots, why do you torture me so?

So Hawken got really good while nobody was watching. I wrote it off as a lost cause when I played it months ago. But after hearing some positive buzz about it, I decided to give it a second chance. I've spent some time with Hawken over the past couple of weeks, and I don't mind telling you I was glad I did.

They've made a lot of improvements to the game since I stopped paying attention. New mechs and balance tweaks have added a lot of depth and variety to the gameplay. Dynamic game types like the "Siege" maps have come a long way - pitting two teams against each other in a race to fuel their sides massive flying-battle-carrier to bombard the enemy base, while at the same time they wrestle for control of a vital anti-air artillery piece to take down the enemies ship; It's chaotic, fun, and very cinematic. I get chills every time those air-raid sirens go off. And the game looks great, scaling well even on my modest PC. I have most of the graphical bells and whistles turned on and I still rock a decent frame rate, a far cry from the potato-spud level of performance I've been getting out of MWO and a few other games lately.

Speaking of MWO, coming off that abusive relationship, Hawken's F2P hooks are refreshingly light. The grind isn't terribly bad, you can buy a new mech with only a few hours of gameplay so you're encouraged to experiment around and grow your garage. If you just can't wait and want to buy a mech with real dollars, the price is decent, around $5 a stompy bot. Maybe that doesn't sound great, but when MWO wants you to pony up anywhere between $15-$35 real cash dollars for a fancy robit, Hawken's price point looks mighty fine. Garage space is unlimited, they don't try to get you on any character slots or anything, and the customization options are cheap and snazzy. I was able to get a nice paint job for my medic-bot just using the handful of points that came free when I opened a beta account months ago.



So I was very excited to hear about the new Ascension patch! A massive update to the game delivering a ton of new content. New maps, new mechs, tweaks all over the place, and even better optimization. It sounded like I joined in at just the right time!

Sadly, no.

After delaying the patch for a week, and offering a stress test weekend of the new content (which was fantastic), the patch that was supposed to go live on Monday has been stuck in limbo. The game has been down for over 30 hours at the time I'm writing this. A very contrite dev post on the forum broke the bad news that something went wrong with the patch and it needs to be delayed AGAIN, with more details coming sometime in the afternoon.

I feel bad for the guys at Adhesive Games. They have a lot riding on this update. It's no secret that Hawken hasn't performed as well as they expected, and Ascension is supposed to be big turn around point that saves them.

Bad patches and expectation shortfalls seem to be the plight of any stompy robot game I touch these days. Hopefully AC: V-Day will be a smoother experience. And hey, we've always got Titanfall to look forward to.

* - Otherwise known as "can I still get hipster cred for liking Deadly Premonition?" You sure can buddy, you sure can.

* - You should be excited to kill a bulldozer with a flashlight, YOU SHOULD BE.

A - You know, a Darkwing Duck game would be pretty rad.

A - Zerocrossing isn't at all excited about the new generation. I guess that's a fair position, but I think there is also a lot to look forward to. Dismissing all the possibilities of the Xbox One and PS4 as "prettier graphics" is a bit short sighted.

A - Tetris is deep.

A - You can never go home, the answer is no, and wishing for it only makes it bleed.

S - The Germans continue to be crazy about how they censor things, some small part of me still thinks those Generals look cooler all cyberpunked up.

A - Press kits are going to press kit. From what I understand from people in the industry, this kind of stunt gets tiresome after awhile. There is only so much desk space for poorly made hype merch.

M - As always, AS ALWAYS, hell is other people.

I - What a tease with his short little intro...

R - "IT'S SO PRETTY!!!" - the subtext of most reviews about Journey. Still wish I had a PS3 to give this one a try.

T - Handy little PSA for all the PC Mass Effect players out there! Get them good looking textures!

R - Wandering the Mohave never goes out of style.

? - I guess there TheGrinWeeper is so meta-aware that even saying "spoiler alert" at the start of a review or blog will cause him to instantly work out all the possible plot twists, dooming his enjoyment as much as stating them outright. M'kay?





-Wrenchfarm

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About CblogRecapsone of us since 11:27 PM on 07.02.2008

About Cblog Recaps

Schedule:
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Tuesdays - Larxinostic
Wednesdays - DeadMoon
Thursdays -OrochiLeona
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Reserve Recappers:
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Current "Bloggers Wanted" assignment
Fake it until you make it

This month's bloggers wanted prompt is something we stole. You see, by stealing this idea, you have no idea how truly inept I actually am. By pretending to know what I'm doing, I have clearly used my ill-gotten status to meet such big-time celebrities as Darlington Woolie "Pie Stealer" Madden or Sara from [insert pixel indie game studio here].

This month's bloggers wanted was inspired by the internal enjoyment we had at reading TheBlondeBass' promoted blog on faking conversational anime knowledge. And now it seems as good a time as ever to pretend to know what's going on since the new Fate/Grand Order game launched and qtoid is talking about it. I am a big fan of the character design of Artoria in the blue dress, or Artoria in the suit, or Artoria in the red dress. But seriously, we enjoyed the format so much that we want to ask the community for their own ideas at faking it at all sorts of things.

But this prompt is not just for anime, of course. The video game industry is fractured with all sorts of niche interests that only an insane rich person with no job could realistically know everything about. This month's bloggers wanted is about taking a subject you want to offer advice on faking knowledge about in order to help the greater community, for better or for worse. If this doesn't sound serious, don't worry, you're not supposed to take it seriously. You don't have to be an expert in whatever you talk about any more than Bass is an expert in anime.

I seriously don't know if that was a compliment or an insult.

Offer advice on anything you can expand your mind on. Want to help people get into character action games? The more Ss you put into its grading system, the cooler it is! Want to convince people to get into the Neptunia series? Just say "Nep-Nep!" and you're all set to convince people of your technical knowledge! Can you get someone into RTS game by just talking about your APM? Someone's bound to believe some random technical jargon you made up!

To get started, start a blog and title it "Faking it: [your blog title here]." Then you can be as serious or facetious as you want as you provide advice on any number of things: learning how to play fighting games, trying a long-running franchise you've probably neglected, or even explaining a game's timeline. Heck, you can probably seriously try on that last one and we still wouldn't believe you.

Good luck this month. Only true cowards rely on facts. Real heroes pretend to know what they're doing!



Current Community Contests
PREPARE TO CONTEST - The Master Gaming List Birthday Giveaway!

Good Morning/Evening/Yesterday, my Friends/Robots/INSERT WAIFU HERE,

More or less a week ago, the Master Gaming List turned one year old. I had a speech prepared, but the blog editor ate it four or five times over the last few days, so I'm kind of winging it now.

Despite all of the threatening and cajoling I initially made to get you all on the list, I never imagined I'd still be adding names a year later (and by "you all", I mostly mean GajKnight). It was kind of a ridiculous undertaking at first, trying to make a semi-permanent, easily-updatable list of everyone's contact info. I'm not even sure what everyone was being hyped over last year that got me to do this.

That said, I'm glad it came together, and this list has lead to many other things for me on Destructoid; whether it was me becoming our laziest, cuddliest Community Manager, or our laziest, cuddliest Reviews-type-person, I have always enjoyed the full love and support of this community.

In thanks, and with the assistance of quite a few others, I've gathered up a number of game keys to give away to you all.

The Contest

I've never run a contest before, so let's keep things simple. Write me a haiku about your favorite game.

Rules

1. The haiku must not include the title of the game.

2. I will accept any other form of structured poetry if you are unable to haiku but can iambic pantameter (you monster).

3. Please state what key you are going for, and a backup if that one is taken (admittedly, it's quantity over variety here)

4. The tentative end date of the contest will be August 13th, and will be bumped at least once during that time.

Available Keys

-Stellaris
-Aporia: Beyond The Valley (Multiple Keys)
-The Witness
-Citadel: Forged With Fire (Multiple Keys)
-Armello
-Undertale
-ABZU

Thank you to all 282 of you who have made the Master List a successful project over the past year! I will continue updating it into the forseeable future.


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