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LONG BLOG

C Blogs of 05/11, 05/12 & 05/13 2013 + mcgeeisms

   0

Looks like I'm doing the whole weekend + Monday! IDK about these -isms, though. They're not going well. They're getting cold and drippy, and the texture is really gross. They're fucked up. They were fine like half an hour ago, Where were you then? Probably playing those stupid videogames.

Like that Bioshock Infinte nonsense. I've been playing through that, and it's, like, okay, I guess. It's stunningly beautiful; I'll give it that. The artists who worked on that game really do deserve a medal or something. Maybe a Nobel prize.
I'm not sure how far I am, but I just found this Chinese guy was dead but isn't now that I'm here. He needs a hammer for his dead-madness or something.

I know people are back & forth on whether or not it's too violent, or should have been something besides a shooter. I think the violence is probably important; it seems like it might be a plot point. However, I am totally on board with those that think it shouldn't be an FPS. Not because "art" or whatever, but because it's pure schlocky garbage as a shooter. Everything about the mechanics feels wrong, except for maybe smacking people with the skyhook. The default movement speed for looking is too, as well.
Maybe I've had too much wine, or maybe I need Metro Last Light right fucking now.

CAPS LOCK or
LOCK CAPS? Is there a difference? Does it matter? Opposites that aren't really opposites? A paradox of oppositore sames? Shut up?




S - Save State episode 4. Written by ShadeOfLight, this one is about Fire Emblem: Path of Radiance and that cheeky sneak, Volke.

A - How dare Nintendo fix their broken game. Also, gay.

M - Far Cry 3 taught NickTheHumanBoy to loooooove. Violence, that is.

A - ArkhamJester takes a look back at Lunar Silver Star Story Complete, a.k.a. the Blade Runner of videogames. (Besides the Blade Runner game)

S - Not a particularly wordy blog today, but amxwolf still shares some good music. This time from Terraria.

A - knutaf finally takes the plunge into the darkness. The Eternal Darkness. He has a write-up about his experience, and it seems the game still holds up. Oh and he streamed it for others' enjoyment. So nice!  I tell ya, that tome should be thrown in a trash bag that's covered in barbed wire.

E - DNSViper enters Dtoid's "Next Top Streamer" contest.

E - OKCTheElite is trying to get that capture equipment too.

F - Fignuts.

C - The Darkerman be back on Dtoid and contemplating what he'll be writing in the near future.

I - Not the most conventional introduction, but I can dig it. Because disco is provably awesome.

S - ccesarano is back, and shares what he's been up to. He also posts some video series he's been doing.

S - Kyousuke Nanbu has some excellent news to share and is celebratin' with good times.

T - I always like seeing worldly perspectives when it comes to videogames. More often than not, it's different in a surprising way. Read Klarden's blog about growing up in the Ukraine, gaming without the help of Nintendo.

T - TroyFullbuster loves the Mario & Luigi series, and has some things he wants to see from Dream Team.

R - SirJoshington reviews Monaco. Sounds like a good time with buddies!

R - The Salty Hippo spills a little copypasta on our pants with this review of Far Cry 3.

D - johnmasterlee updates us on Munchface, and makes a slightly cheesy "board meeting" joke :P

R - Pretty good review for Dead Island Riptide. Technically another copypasta review,

R - scizzle64 retro-reviews Altered Beast. Can anyone tell me why they played that fucking game? I've always hated it so much.

V - Squishy3 brings the short news (in video form) that Phoenix Wright: Dual Destinies is getting a digital e-Shop only release in the west. Hmm...how does that sit with you?

N - Dreadout, an Indonesian survival horror game, needs some supporters for its Indiegogo campaign. It has a demo you can try out to help decide if it is indeed worth it.

T - Kbirth explains why EA getting exclusive rights to make Star Wars games might not be the worst thing in the world.

V - Cutie Honey has a new video series and he's looking for feedback. He's got an early look at Sanctum 2 in this entry to Tonight We Try.



V - taterchimp got wasted and put together a great collection of silly videos for us.

C - Now I'm getting a tad annoyed at the copypasta reviews. Especially ones that don't get checked first and have tiny text. (Now fixed)

V - Scott didn't actually play any bad games while hammered. I demand a refund.

L - The mustached man stares.




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About CblogRecapsone of us since 11:27 PM on 07.02.2008

About Cblog Recaps

Schedule:
Mondays - Lord Spencer
Tuesdays - Larxinostic
Wednesdays - DeadMoon
Thursdays -OrochiLeona
Fridays - Gamemaniac3434
Saturdays - AmnaUmen
Sundays - Riobux

Reserve Recappers:
Gajknight
LinkSlayer64
ShadeOfLight
Torchman
TheBlondeBass
Hypno Coffin

Current "Bloggers Wanted" assignment
Fake it until you make it

This month's bloggers wanted prompt is something we stole. You see, by stealing this idea, you have no idea how truly inept I actually am. By pretending to know what I'm doing, I have clearly used my ill-gotten status to meet such big-time celebrities as Darlington Woolie "Pie Stealer" Madden or Sara from [insert pixel indie game studio here].

This month's bloggers wanted was inspired by the internal enjoyment we had at reading TheBlondeBass' promoted blog on faking conversational anime knowledge. And now it seems as good a time as ever to pretend to know what's going on since the new Fate/Grand Order game launched and qtoid is talking about it. I am a big fan of the character design of Artoria in the blue dress, or Artoria in the suit, or Artoria in the red dress. But seriously, we enjoyed the format so much that we want to ask the community for their own ideas at faking it at all sorts of things.

But this prompt is not just for anime, of course. The video game industry is fractured with all sorts of niche interests that only an insane rich person with no job could realistically know everything about. This month's bloggers wanted is about taking a subject you want to offer advice on faking knowledge about in order to help the greater community, for better or for worse. If this doesn't sound serious, don't worry, you're not supposed to take it seriously. You don't have to be an expert in whatever you talk about any more than Bass is an expert in anime.

I seriously don't know if that was a compliment or an insult.

Offer advice on anything you can expand your mind on. Want to help people get into character action games? The more Ss you put into its grading system, the cooler it is! Want to convince people to get into the Neptunia series? Just say "Nep-Nep!" and you're all set to convince people of your technical knowledge! Can you get someone into RTS game by just talking about your APM? Someone's bound to believe some random technical jargon you made up!

To get started, start a blog and title it "Faking it: [your blog title here]." Then you can be as serious or facetious as you want as you provide advice on any number of things: learning how to play fighting games, trying a long-running franchise you've probably neglected, or even explaining a game's timeline. Heck, you can probably seriously try on that last one and we still wouldn't believe you.

Good luck this month. Only true cowards rely on facts. Real heroes pretend to know what they're doing!



Current Community Contests
PREPARE TO CONTEST - The Master Gaming List Birthday Giveaway!

Good Morning/Evening/Yesterday, my Friends/Robots/INSERT WAIFU HERE,

More or less a week ago, the Master Gaming List turned one year old. I had a speech prepared, but the blog editor ate it four or five times over the last few days, so I'm kind of winging it now.

Despite all of the threatening and cajoling I initially made to get you all on the list, I never imagined I'd still be adding names a year later (and by "you all", I mostly mean GajKnight). It was kind of a ridiculous undertaking at first, trying to make a semi-permanent, easily-updatable list of everyone's contact info. I'm not even sure what everyone was being hyped over last year that got me to do this.

That said, I'm glad it came together, and this list has lead to many other things for me on Destructoid; whether it was me becoming our laziest, cuddliest Community Manager, or our laziest, cuddliest Reviews-type-person, I have always enjoyed the full love and support of this community.

In thanks, and with the assistance of quite a few others, I've gathered up a number of game keys to give away to you all.

The Contest

I've never run a contest before, so let's keep things simple. Write me a haiku about your favorite game.

Rules

1. The haiku must not include the title of the game.

2. I will accept any other form of structured poetry if you are unable to haiku but can iambic pantameter (you monster).

3. Please state what key you are going for, and a backup if that one is taken (admittedly, it's quantity over variety here)

4. The tentative end date of the contest will be August 13th, and will be bumped at least once during that time.

Available Keys

-Stellaris
-Aporia: Beyond The Valley (Multiple Keys)
-The Witness
-Citadel: Forged With Fire (Multiple Keys)
-Armello
-Undertale
-ABZU

Thank you to all 282 of you who have made the Master List a successful project over the past year! I will continue updating it into the forseeable future.


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