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LONG BLOG

C Blogs of 03/12/13 + Wrenchisms

   0




So I guess SimCity is pretty broken? I wouldn't know by the 300 blogs about it today!

I was actually going to talk about it for my Wrenchism today, but yeah, I think the topic has been pretty well covered by now so I'll keep it brief. SimCity is a huge fiasco and it's hard to tell exactly where everything went wrong. I don't think it is completely fair to scream "DRM" about it like that was the only issue. The off-user-CPU sim computing done on Maxis servers was supposed to let the game be one of the deepest and most technically demanding sim experiences ever without taxing the users computer, leaving it free for pretty graphics and such. So there were supposed to be some user advantages to their system. Too bad it all went wrong.

I actually wonder if the problems run deeper than most realize. From everything I've heard there is some sneaking suspicion that the game might be broken on a more fundamental level. These posts looking at the problems with traffic congestion and mindless NPCs seem to suggest that the game isn't working as intended even when you're able to get connected. The fact that sims will just brainlessly wander into any job or home and call it their own or tourists will allow themselves to be ferried from one tram stop to another all day instead of doing any shopping flies directly in the face of everything Maxis had been saying about following the detailed lives of individual sims and the fine amount of detail they were processing.

It's a shame. I thought this new SimCity could have followed in the fine footsteps of XCOM: Enemy Unknown, Civ 5 and to a lesser extent Mechwarrior Online of taking a beloved, but complicated, classic PC franchise and re-building it to be something that appeals to the broader market without losing the core of its essence. It looked like they were on the right track, but as soon as launch day hit, everything turned to crap.

This will make a hell of a story in a year or two. When the dust settles and we finally get a good post-modem on what exactly happened, who dropped what ball, where the blame lies. Is this EA's fault? Did they demand crazy DRM which crippled the game? Did they penny-pinch on the servers and respond to slow to the catastrophic launch? Did Maxis lay an egg? Did they massively underestimate just how much users would tax their ability to process data? Did the game ever work right at all? Hopefully we'll find out one day and hopefully other devs can learn from this lesson.



BTW, birthday shouts-outs to Corduroy Turtle, Teh_Tommy, and AlphaDeus. Your parents all fucked at the same time!

* - LowerTierPodcast is back, and they've brought necrified Nazis! Check out their contest and see how you do can shoot off undead Nazi balls.

* - This T-Shirt design is so cool it ripped out my spine and crushed it for electrolytes.

* - I don't think episodic games are the future. It works for some titles, but it's not something I would want to see for every major game. Still, interesting look at the pros and cons of the possibility.

* - A great look at sexuality in video games by Azudarko. Also, hot Batman action.

A - Esteban Sky Cuevas is mad as hell about SimCity and he's not going to take it anymore.

A - BargainBrogan, also mad as hell about SimCity.

A - All these DRM games will one day be gone, likes tears in the rain. I STILL LOVE YOU RUTGER HAUER.

A - Every blog today is about SimCity! Returner Mike talks about how we gamers have brought the SimCity boondoggle on ourselves by being so lax against corporate bullshit.

A - The SimCity meltdown continues. CodeFire thinks all that "cloud CPU sim" stuff is a bunch of bull and the game is barely any good even when it is working.

A - FunWithExplosives shares his frustration with all the half-started and could-have-been games he's abandoned over the years. I think a lot of people with creative impulses and low follow through can relate.

A - Jamesliv963's indifference to the new consoles seems to be a common thing. Are we all just too jaded to enjoy things these days, or are the next consoles genuinely unimpressive? Personally, I'm pretty amped for them.

A - The Xi3 is a disaster. Don't know what they are thinking.

E - Is this a contest entry, or the work of a mad genius?

$ - Sony is letting Vitas go cheap in Japan and most American Sony Store locations. Something about them not selling well? Who knew!? Thanks to Lingoes for the tip-off.

R - Fndango takes a square look at The Witcher: Enhanced Edition. Still a damn fine game.

P - Army of Two:The Devils Cartel bums me out. It's all grim and serious. The series should have gone deeper into the buddy cop, frathouse love affair vibe that permeated the first title.

R - I couldn't help but giggle at this necro-review for SMBIII. Oh no, I can't save anywhere! The difficulty is too high! These kids today.

A - Stubbleman takes a crack at the Persona art style and does not disappoint! Well done!

R - Vito just popping by to let us know he should write more blogs? OK!

F - Indie Kickstarter spam is more sympathetic than other spam, but still spam.

F - Some people might think it's petty to fail Karutomaru out of hand. I'm not one of those people.


I would totally play SimCity:Mechwarrior. You make a fine urban paradise, I drop on it from orbit in a giant stompy robot. Fun for everyone right?

-Wrenchfarm

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About CblogRecapsone of us since 11:27 PM on 07.02.2008

About Cblog Recaps

Schedule:
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Reserve Recappers:
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Current "Bloggers Wanted" assignment
Fake it until you make it

This month's bloggers wanted prompt is something we stole. You see, by stealing this idea, you have no idea how truly inept I actually am. By pretending to know what I'm doing, I have clearly used my ill-gotten status to meet such big-time celebrities as Darlington Woolie "Pie Stealer" Madden or Sara from [insert pixel indie game studio here].

This month's bloggers wanted was inspired by the internal enjoyment we had at reading TheBlondeBass' promoted blog on faking conversational anime knowledge. And now it seems as good a time as ever to pretend to know what's going on since the new Fate/Grand Order game launched and qtoid is talking about it. I am a big fan of the character design of Artoria in the blue dress, or Artoria in the suit, or Artoria in the red dress. But seriously, we enjoyed the format so much that we want to ask the community for their own ideas at faking it at all sorts of things.

But this prompt is not just for anime, of course. The video game industry is fractured with all sorts of niche interests that only an insane rich person with no job could realistically know everything about. This month's bloggers wanted is about taking a subject you want to offer advice on faking knowledge about in order to help the greater community, for better or for worse. If this doesn't sound serious, don't worry, you're not supposed to take it seriously. You don't have to be an expert in whatever you talk about any more than Bass is an expert in anime.

I seriously don't know if that was a compliment or an insult.

Offer advice on anything you can expand your mind on. Want to help people get into character action games? The more Ss you put into its grading system, the cooler it is! Want to convince people to get into the Neptunia series? Just say "Nep-Nep!" and you're all set to convince people of your technical knowledge! Can you get someone into RTS game by just talking about your APM? Someone's bound to believe some random technical jargon you made up!

To get started, start a blog and title it "Faking it: [your blog title here]." Then you can be as serious or facetious as you want as you provide advice on any number of things: learning how to play fighting games, trying a long-running franchise you've probably neglected, or even explaining a game's timeline. Heck, you can probably seriously try on that last one and we still wouldn't believe you.

Good luck this month. Only true cowards rely on facts. Real heroes pretend to know what they're doing!



Current Community Contests
PREPARE TO CONTEST - The Master Gaming List Birthday Giveaway!

Good Morning/Evening/Yesterday, my Friends/Robots/INSERT WAIFU HERE,

More or less a week ago, the Master Gaming List turned one year old. I had a speech prepared, but the blog editor ate it four or five times over the last few days, so I'm kind of winging it now.

Despite all of the threatening and cajoling I initially made to get you all on the list, I never imagined I'd still be adding names a year later (and by "you all", I mostly mean GajKnight). It was kind of a ridiculous undertaking at first, trying to make a semi-permanent, easily-updatable list of everyone's contact info. I'm not even sure what everyone was being hyped over last year that got me to do this.

That said, I'm glad it came together, and this list has lead to many other things for me on Destructoid; whether it was me becoming our laziest, cuddliest Community Manager, or our laziest, cuddliest Reviews-type-person, I have always enjoyed the full love and support of this community.

In thanks, and with the assistance of quite a few others, I've gathered up a number of game keys to give away to you all.

The Contest

I've never run a contest before, so let's keep things simple. Write me a haiku about your favorite game.

Rules

1. The haiku must not include the title of the game.

2. I will accept any other form of structured poetry if you are unable to haiku but can iambic pantameter (you monster).

3. Please state what key you are going for, and a backup if that one is taken (admittedly, it's quantity over variety here)

4. The tentative end date of the contest will be August 13th, and will be bumped at least once during that time.

Available Keys

-Stellaris
-Aporia: Beyond The Valley (Multiple Keys)
-The Witness
-Citadel: Forged With Fire (Multiple Keys)
-Armello
-Undertale
-ABZU

Thank you to all 282 of you who have made the Master List a successful project over the past year! I will continue updating it into the forseeable future.


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