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LONG BLOG

BoB: 10 video game creatures to eat this holiday season

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This month's Band of Bloggers prompt is all about Feasts. When I wrote that prompt, I didn't know what I would personally write about. I didn't have a specific game in mind. But then we had this miracle hit the internet: 

I am so stoked for this movie. My most antipated 2019 movies, in order, are: Avengers 4, Star Wars Episode IX, and Detective Pikachu. 

But this made me think. What if Pokemon actually were real? In that case, which ones would be tasty to eat? This leads me to this blog. A list of video game creatures (not just Pokemon) that I think might be tasty. Let's dive in!

Image result for pokemon tauros

Tauros (a Pokemon) is the most obvious choice here. He's a steer with multiple tails. I envision he would taste most like beefalo. Nice and meaty. Excellent steaks. Fantastic burgers. And epic brisket. Imagine a breakfast burrito with some Tauros brisket and some Psyduck scrambled eggs. Yum!

Image result for garuda final fantasy x

Garuda is a giant bird monster in Final Fantasy X. Can you imagine what the wings must taste like on this thing? Chicken Wings are my favorite food. I could eat them almost every day and be very happy to do so. But imagine those wings on a massive scale? Slather some buffalo sauce on it. Dip it in a cauldron of ranch. Go to town. You could probably feed a village with it.

Image result for zelda jabu jabu

Jabu Jabu from Ocarina of Time looks succulent. The best fish I ever ate was a Swordfish steak. It was so meaty. It was like a beef steak. So good. I imagine this is how Jabu Jabu must taste. Hearty and filling. Sear a filet on an iron skillet. Cover it some kind of chutney, peach/mango maybe? Rice on the side I think. 

Imagine Turtle Soup, but made out of Koopa Troopas from Super Mario World. I must confess, I've never had Turtle Soup. But I hear that it's just divine. I would love to try it. And if I also get to enjoy consuming the flesh of these little freaks, that's all the better. I am certain it would need some Chipotle Tabasco to go with it.

Image result for skyrim dragon

The Dragons of Skyrim have got to be delicious. I can't even guess what one would taste like. I envision a cross between Alligator and Turkey. Maybe braise them in some Argonian Ale. Throw in some Nirnroot for flavor and nutrition. You've got yourself a feast fit for a Jarl!

Image result for silver pegasus heroes 3

I've never had horse meat (I don't think it's legal to consume in the U.S.). But one of my best friends had it when he was a missionary in New Zealand. He said it was the most delicious meat he's ever had. I can only imagine that a Silver Pegasus from Heroes III would be the tastiest horse one could eat. Serve it with some sweet potatoes and have pie for dessert.

Image result for mareep

I'd love some rack of Mareep (an electric sheep Pokemon) served with some mint jelly. I also think Mareep would be delicous in a greek gyro.

Wild Mushroom.gif

Wild Mushrooms are an enemy in the Golden Sun franchise. I think they'd go very well in the American version of Beef Stroganoff (heck, make it Tauros Stroganoff). You'd want chunks of Wild Mushroom, as well as Cream of Wild Mushroom Soup to go in it. 

Spacecow

Mass Effect has a creature called a Shifty Looking Cow. I want to eat if for no other reason than this guy is up to something and if I eat him, he won't be able to accomplish his diabolical purposes. If Commander Shepard were a vegan, the galaxy would be doomed. 

Image result for conker's bad fur day sweet corn

Cheese in Conker's Bad Fur Day is alive. It has googly eyes. I take this to mean that it would be the meatiest cheese imaginable. I want to eat it! I'd particularly enjoy some nachos made out of him. But I think I'd just slice him up and eat him with some really high quality Black Raspberry preserves. 

So there you have it folks! A list of video game creatures to bring to life, slaughter, and eat. What video game creatures would you like to eat? Share your thoughts with us below! And of course, don't forget to write your own blog about video game food before the end of the month!

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About Boxedpresentsman214one of us since 11:17 AM on 01.02.2016