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#what sort of tomdickery?

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Pokewatch: Origins edition

[Submitted through our community blogs, this madness belongs on the home page! -Niero] Overwatch is the biggest game to come out in a long time, and like most of the internet, I've really been enjoying my time with it.  I can't really ...   read

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BREAKING: Stanley Parable dev promises new 'MMO with poetry mechanics'

Responding to recent reports of Titanfall 2's promises for a single-player component that is "science meets magic," co-creator of The Stanley Parable and director of Dr. Langeskov, The Tiger, and the Terribly Cursed Emerald: A Whirlwind Hei...   read

WHAT!? photo

GameStop is publishing a game AND 'not trying to be a publisher'

Hahaha. The new hotness from Insomniac (aside from the Ratchet and Clank tie-in) is Song of the Deep, a 2D, underwater metroidvania. It's $15 for PC, PS4, Xbox One. And GameStop, the retailer, is publishing it. But don't call GameStop a pub...   read

GOTY 2015 photo
GOTY 2015

Mike Martin's picks for games that he picked in 2015

Hello everybody! Your (not so) favorite, foul-mouthed, perverted, shit-posting Community Manager here. 2015 was a helluva year for games. All bullshit aside, we are starting to see some truly amazing games come out. When I was a babby, play...   read


Friday Night Fights - It is here!

It is almost Christmas and there is a new Star Wars movie out. *drops mic*   read

Mario's li'l dick photo
Mario's li'l dick

Mario's silhouette shows off his li'l dick

Mario has been with us for a long time. He's an icon. He has been scrutinized, discussed, and deified among gamers. That doesn't matter at all right now. What matters right now is Mario's silhouette looks like it has a li'l dick. Originally...   read

Game changer photo
Game changer

Upcoming PhysX update introduces state of the art dick physics (Fauxclusive)

Game developers around the world will soon be able to create the most naturalistic penises ever when NVIDIA releases the next update for its popular PhysX SDK. Codenamed “Woody Womb Pecker,” the update is being called a game-c...   read

Rustic photo

Rustic: Rust generates avatar cock size by Steam ID

Haha, rustic. I think it's time for Jordan to take another Rust adventure. The open world survival sim is fascinating. It recently made headlines when players flipped out after it randomly assigned face and skin tone to users' Steam IDs. An...   read

Cage'd photo
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The most unrealistic thing that has ever happened in a video game

"I liked Indigo Prophecy, but Heavy Rain and Beyond sucked." Oh, is that right? Heavy Rain is a little bit bad, and I haven't played Beyond, but let's never get rose-tinted when talking about Fahrenheit/Indigo Prophecy. Because for its exc...   read

Jiggly photo

Jigglypuff punching Mario straight in the dick

The Destructoid staff workshopped this headline together, as we usually do. We decided that it was straight to the point, kind of the way that Jigglypuff's arm-paddle thing is straight to the point ("the point" is Mario's dick). All this di...   read


Don't get cocky photo
Don't get cocky
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Expensive dick moderation helped kill the last LEGO MMO

Someone think about the children! Like my own personal brand, LEGO is a family-friendly, name-stealing company. And so the open-ended, Minecraft-like builder LEGO Worlds has some problem what with immature idiots' propensity to build cock. ...   read

Nuts, baby! photo
Nuts, baby!
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Oh hell yeah! Ashen Rift has dog testicle (balls!) physics

Ashen Rift is a nice-looking, post apocalypse shooter, etc. There was a Kickstarter, now there is a new one. It'll come to PC and PSN eventually. Now that the housekeeping is out of the way... DOG BALLS PHYSICS!!! My enthusiasm was sl...   read

Penis photo
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Far Cry 4 has more naked boobs, also a lil dick!

Far Cry's new thing seems to be free flowing painted/tribal tits, nipple slips be damned, and those feature prominently in this video. But if you stick around, you'll see that there is also a little, flaccid penis! I never let a dick get b...   read

Lil dick pt 2 photo
Lil dick pt 2

That expensive, gold Monster Hunter statue? Doesn't have a lil dick!

Last month, we brought you an investigative, penetrative look at this $29,000 gold Monster Hunter statue. Particularly, "does it...does it have a lil dick?" we asked. It wasn't immediately clear. All the photos provided by Capcom ...   read

Schrdingers' cat's dick photo
Schrdingers' cat's dick

Does this $29,000 gold Monster Hunter statue have a lil dick?

Capcom is selling a $29,000, solid gold Otomo Airou statue to commemorate the 10th anniversary of Monster Hunter.  Does it have a dick, though? We at the Destructoid virtual office thought it might. "does it...does it have a lil d...   read

Tokyo Jungle photo
Tokyo Jungle

America wasn't as into Tokyo Jungle as Europe

Asked how Tokyo Jungle fared outside of Japan, director Yohei Kataoka gave Siliconera a rather discouraging response for us fans in the United States. "Europe loved it, and we got a lot of great feedback from that audience, but [in] America...   read

Far Cry: Blood Dragon photo
Far Cry: Blood Dragon

Is Blood Dragon III: Vietnam War 2 just an April Fools' Day joke?

Look, my attitude to April Fools' Day is that if it looks like bollocks and it sounds like bollocks, then it probably is bollocks. However, after last year's reveal of the amazing Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon on April Fools' Day, I'd be hesitant...   read

Frog Fractions 2 photo
Frog Fractions 2

Is there a Frog Fractions 2 ARG already underway?

The original Frog Fractions was one of the most bizarre things you could play in in a web browser, so it wasn't a surprise to see a potential sequel arrive on Kickstarter last week. What is odd is that, if the Kickstarter is successful, Fro...   read

Dtoid TV photo
Dtoid TV
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Live show: Soldier of Fortune: Payback

[Mash Tactics airs Monday through Friday at 4p.m. Pacific on Dtoid.TV. Watch Rick 'King Foom' Olson play a variety of games, each day with its own theme. With a heavy focus on community and viewer interaction, you can be as much a...   read


Browse Destructoid with your arrow keys like a boss

Would you like to browse Destructoid posts by just using your arrow keys? Here you go. The tool was created by the folks at Nextly, a cool browser app that lets you skip from one post to another at the click of a key, and also lets you impo...   read

Curiosity photo

Curiosity goes a bit mad with new in-app purchases

I had long since deleted Curiosity from my iPhone after spending admittedly far too much time (see: more than five minutes) tinkering with the cooperative game about chipping away layers of a massive cube. But now, here I am, redownloading ...   read


New Dtoid site feature violates Trademark! Help!

Last week Destructoid rolled out a new feature, as requested on our Uservoice forum, that allowed our editors to group clusters of stories together around a specific product (instead of using related tags or creating a tag for every un...   read

Ni no Kuni pee-pee photo
Ni no Kuni pee-pee

I helped a girl take a piss in Ni No Kuni

It wouldn't be fair to say that Ni No Kuni has a specific urination quest. It's more of a side story or side effect of a larger task, if you will.  Nevertheless, when I came upon this girl who needed to whiz, I immediately wrote it off...   read

2 Legit 2 Quit photo
2 Legit 2 Quit

EVE Online update overhauls bounty hunting

EVE Online is one tough cookie to crack. Sure, it's a massively multiplayer online game. It's also one part space-faring strategy game, business simulator, and space-pirate dream fantasy as well. Much of the game is filled with people that ...   read

Sterling Aiayla LyonsFeatured blogger

Sterling Lyons, better known in some circles as "Aiayla", is an avid videogame player of all genres. From Genesis, to Playstation, to PC, Aiayla does it all. League of Legends, and other PC and M...



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Civilization VI"Founding the New World"


Corpse Party"It's a dead man's party"


Battlefield 1"Back from the Great War on shore leave, Kenneth?"


WWE 2K17"S! A! W! F! T!"

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OH SHIT, forgot I had Fatal Frame 2! Time for spOOOOoooOOOOOpy game!


#WaterMusicWednesday Another Sonic track because why not!


I think this is my favorite OW video on


The World Of Final Fantasy Limited Ed sold out on Amazon today before I could buy Now its and I can get the standard for Is the Limited Edition worth the extra $30? What should I do? How is the artbook and in-game extras?


What the fuck am I doing? Im supposed to be productive ¯\_(ツ)_/¯


#WaterMusicWednesday Sonic CD Tidal Tempest Zone Present That bass and piano though!!!


I just went from having no games to play to having too Picked up Dragon Quest Builders and am digging that, but Corpse Party and World of Final Fantasy both came in yesterday and I want to play all three! #FirstNerdProblems

Screamin Churros

#WaterMusicWednesday ? Ok, I got one here:


Got something for Who knew DK and prog metal would work together so well?


Beat Ariandel Dont really feel like playing it thoroughly You could probably speed run it in 30 Final boss is cool, but borders on being Side boss is Spells are trash, weapons are Fanservicey and Bloodborne as


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