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#Destructoid Originals

A fun quiz, for you photo
A fun quiz, for you
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Is this a lyric from ZZ Top's 'Burger Man,' or something said on an E3 stage?

For a rock band formed in Houston, Texas in 1969, ZZ Top is weird. But in the most straight-faced way that you might not catch if you don't stop and look, kind of like reading the headline "Man bites dog." Two front men with dark sunglasses...   read

Spoilers: not good photo
Spoilers: not good
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Grading Ubisoft's E3 2016 conference

Two. Fucking. Hours. You can watch our impressions video for the final verdict, then tell us if we're spot-on critical mavens or out of touch, hopeless hacks!   read

Microsoft E3 recap photo
Microsoft E3 recap
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Grading Microsoft's E3 2016 conference

Microsoft delivered a solid outing at E3 this year. Most of the games where already known -- save for Forza Horizon 3 and zombie games State of Decay 2 and the new Dead Rising -- but the company (mostly) learned to zip up and show gam...   read

On the scene at E3 photo
On the scene at E3
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Grading Bethesda's E3 2016 conference

Bethesda tried to wash the taste of EA out of our mouths ahead of the E3 show floor opening and more or less succeeded, but maybe it was just the garlic and cheddar hamburgers Zack grilled up for us while we watched the company finally adm...   read

EA E3 2016 grade photo
EA E3 2016 grade
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Grading EA's E3 2016 press conference

Maybe you missed it, but yesterday Electronic Arts held an event where a famous (?) soccer manager came on stage to talk about FIFA. There were other games, too, and by EA's unfortunate standards the press conference was better than the la...   read

Game Boy Advance turns 15 photo
Game Boy Advance turns 15

Happy 15th anniversary to the Game Boy Advance

I'm leaving on a jet plane at 6AM tomorrow morning for E3, an entire week dedicated to the hottest upcoming new video games and my own navigating how to play all these hot new games after just getting my thumb ripped out of its socket. It'l...   read

Destructoid Original photo
Destructoid Original

Why we should stop getting hyped for upcoming games

When Hello Games announced a minor delay for its much-anticipated game No Man's Sky, the team received death threats. When Kotaku so much as reported on the delay, its staff also got death threats. This is obviously a huge goddamn...   read


Overwatch: The benefits of unsurprising characterization

Overwatch has many characters. Some are superintelligent gorillas armed with lightning guns. Some are world-renowned DJs who can cure people with the power of music. Some are peppy, time-travelling Royal Air Force pilots. Some are huggable ...   read

Overwatch ranking photo
Overwatch ranking
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Overwatch characters' given names, ranked

Torbjörn. Zarya. Genji. Junkrat. All good, strong American names. But if you watch enough of Blizzard's animated shorts (or Overwatch hentai), you'll start to uncover a rich, detailed backstory to the hugely popular shooter. For exampl...   read

Friendship for everyone photo
Friendship for everyone
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I spent last night tagging train cars and huffing paint in Kingspray Graffiti Simulator

Remember that video of the VR graffiti sim that went viral a bit ago? I worked some magic and got my hands on an early copy for the HTC Vive to give you all a sneak peek at what to expect when Kingspray Graffiti Simulator launches on ...   read

Death Threats photo
Death Threats

Sociopathic gamer's death threats just aren't what they used to be (Fauxclusive)

Deleting a poorly constructed sentence detailing his plan to skin a game developer alive, perpetually angry gamer Marsten Cally admitted today his heart is no longer in the vile, disgusting death threats he sends out.   read

Zero Time Dilemma photo
Zero Time Dilemma

Zero Time Dilemma's creator likes to joke about being a failure in bed

I was lucky to score an interview with Kotaro Uchikoshi, creator of the Zero Escape series (999, Virtue's Last Reward, and the upcoming Zero Time Dilemma) for the next issue of Nintendo Force. We touched upon topics big and small, such as w...   read

H4X photo

BEGIN TRANSMISSION: Pro or anti-dick flap?

Hello my fellow netizens. I was recently able to hack the private email servers of handsome video game website and in the interest of speaking truth to power, would like to share the discourse that is shaping your news m...   read

Team Fortress 2 photo
Team Fortress 2

Experience Points .34: Team Fortress 2

Experience Points is a series in which I highlight some of the most memorable things about a particular game. These can include anything from a specific scene or moment, a character, a weapon or item, a level or location, a part of the soun...   read

feat. Skate photo
feat. Skate
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Behind the scenes with the 3D technology of Mass Effect: New Earth

While the highlight of Mass Effect: New Earth was definitely getting a rim massage and being sprayed in the face by smelly bug juice, Destructoid also sent special correspondent Skate Allday to interview 3D LIVE's Nathan Huber about his jo...   read

Opinion photo

Let's stop pretending we're heroes

[Publisher's Note: This was an early-access article from our subscription program, now released for free as Overwatch is out. Leaky benefits! Thanks to our patrons. -Niero] I have never been a hero in a video game. Ever. I've been told...   read

Hands-on Video Preview photo
Hands-on Video Preview
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I'm not sure about Below, but it's pretty

You might have heard of Capy's Below considering we have covered it a couple times. If not it is a dungeon crawler with crafting and survival elements. Instead of doing another written preview, I got my hands on an early build of the ...   read

Guile SFV Guide photo
Guile SFV Guide
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Yup, I still hate Guile in Street Fighter V

Guile, it's nothing personal, but I hate you. You just...don't jive with what I like to do. You're very straight-laced and stone-faced, and I like my fighters on the wackier side. I mean, don't get me wrong, I think you're better than ever ...   read

Fighting games photo
Fighting games
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How I learned to love fighting games again

Asking people why they love a certain kind of game is a waste of time. Our tastes are a complex combination of factors with granular levels and waxing and waning moods, an alchemical formula that requires fourth dimensional physics and forb...   read

Mass Effect: New Earth photo
Mass Effect: New Earth
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Mass Effect: New Earth tickled my bum and sprayed me in the face

California's Great America is making space great again with Mass Effect: New Earth: A 4D Holographic Journey. Destructoid drove an hour south to arid Santa Clara, across from the San Francisco 49er's travesty of a football stadium, to lear...   read

Avant-Garde is back photo
Avant-Garde is back
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The definitive guide to which starter is the best in Pokemon Sun and Moon

You and your closest internet friends have been arguing for days about who the best starting Pokémon is in Sun and Moon with no clear consensus. Well fret not, as we here at Destructoid have you back and have made the deci...   read

Tacos from hell photo
Tacos from hell
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Video: Mr. Destructoid's free tacos from Hell

[A personal favorite, relive this classic Golden Destructoid Moment from 2009 - Niero] Last week, EA sent Nick Chester $200 to test Destructoid's greed as part of their "Circle of Hell" campaign to promote Dante’s Inferno.&...   read

Nintendo VR photo
Nintendo VR

The Nintendo titles you already own are some of the best VR games

Now that I've spent a lot of time with both the Oculus Rift and HTC Vive I can honestly say that the best games available for virtual reality headsets are Nintendo games. I know what you're thinking, "Jed, Nintendo doesn't make VR games!" S...   read

Best starter Pokemon photo
Best starter Pokemon

The best starter Pokemon, ranked

The upcoming Pokemon Sun and Moon revealed its three starting pocket monsters this week: Rowlet, Litten, Popplio (not pictured above), also known as the cast of Garfield. I figured it was perfect timing for a definitive, canon ranking of al...   read

Destructoid Originals photo
Destructoid Originals

Leveling systems scare the crap out of me

I have a few friends who play The Division. Every once in a while, I'll ask them if they're playing it. Yeah, they'll say. I'll ask if it's gotten fun yet. Nah, they'll say. I'll ask them if they're gonna stop playing. "Maybe," they say. "M...   read

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Lead writer of Borderlands 2, curator of



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Screamin Churros

Also, Im slightly pissed thinking about that when I finally decided which career I would pursue (teacher in a public college or an university), coupist president Temer decided to freeze public education and health budgets for 20 Yay!


Songs for Gamers DLC Pack 02 is almost Im really proud of both Pack 02 and Combined, they make for one hell of an The songs are so varied in style, and just amazing to listen Its weird praising my own work =P

Chris Bradshaw

Nintendo selling 2 million Switches in the first month? No Id even call that number

Screamin Churros

Last week: opressing Current week: torrential Im pretty sure that both Archie and Maxie were successfull in awakening Kyogre and Im considering to go in a mystic IRL journey after Rayquaza to stop with this weather


Make #WaterworldWednesday great

Khalid Eternal Nigh

Ok, going out and trying arcade I never tried nightmare on doom Tried it, Doom 2016 SP is great EXCEPT they fd up Its just you take more Thats the lazy and boring way to handle it :/

Electric Reaper

Unbalance School Life is a pretty decent gender bender manga, but the ending is unsatisfying, to say the


Recent events got me thinking about how I ended up here on I wrote a dumb little thing about it in the For real, I kind of love you Dont ever

Madoka Malika

Fresh at ugh ugh


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