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Review: Genital Jousting

Gaming is such a strange and wonderful hobby. You can play in recreations of history’s greatest moments, explore alien planets, race in futuristic space craft and now play as a big floppy penis that is trying to insert itself in the a...

 
 
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The next Overwatch event will be themed around cock

It looks like the next timed event in Overwatch won't be Valentine themed, though that still may be something to look forward to in the future. Last night the Overwatch team revealed that the next event will be themed around Chinese Ne...

 
 
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From our community  

How to Self-Destructoid

[With emotions riding high in the community, Deadmoon shares with us why exactly it is he loves this crazy, broken Dtoid family. <3 ~ JuIc3] A lot of my friends make fun of me when I tell them that I'm an active part of an online communi...

 
 
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My introduction to the Destructoid tip line

So, one of the main benefits of joining the writing staff here is that I've been included on the tip line. Basically, anyone in the world can send an e-mail to [email protected], and the writing staff can sort through those submissions a...

 
 
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YouPorn eSports team banned by league

YouPorn, which my colleagues tell me is a supplier of online "adult" entertainment, sponsors an eSports team, Team YP. It has since 2014, back when I wrote, "More like spornsporning an eSporn team." Hah, nice. Unfortunately, this relationsh...

 
 
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Hot Mess: 10 Years of Destructoid party photos

There's something about the Mr. Destructoid helmet that brings out the animal in people. I've seen sheepish tiny McChicken-like boys turn into fearless crotch-thrusters, running up on stages and doing what three shots of Jager could not aff...

 
 
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Friday Night Fights - Happer Nooo Yur!

Dear lord it's bright. Worked till 6am, drank till 8 and back up at 12pm. Choices. Ugh. It's almost 1pm and I need to go back to work. At least it's Friday and it's a short, 4hr shift. It's the little things. Now excuse me, there's ham on m...

 
 
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Destructoid's award for Overall Best Game of 2015 goes to...

The downfall of Japanese game development has been greatly exaggerated. It sort of reminds me of what happened a century ago, when Dr. Kellogg introduced Kellogg's Corn Flakes in hopes that it would reduce masturbation. Kellogg devoted much...

 
 
 
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Friday Night Fights - Ch-ch-ch-chaaaanges

Well isn't this Hunky Dory? A nice little Friday. We have a new Call of Duty to play together. We have a new Fallout to play with ourselves (HA! HA!). We have herpes. Wait, that's just me. My bad. "So shut up and tell us what's changing Mik...

 
 
 
 
 
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Rust soft launches female avatars, 'you never had a choice'

Back when I was telling you about how Rust automatically generates penis size based on Steam ID, a footnote to that article was that female player models were on their way to the survival sandbox, too. Well, this momentous addition was anno...

 
 
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Rustic: Rust generates avatar cock size by Steam ID

Haha, rustic. I think it's time for Jordan to take another Rust adventure. The open world survival sim is fascinating. It recently made headlines when players flipped out after it randomly assigned face and skin tone to users' Steam IDs. An...

 
 
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Expensive dick moderation helped kill the last LEGO MMO

Someone think about the children! Like my own personal brand, LEGO is a family-friendly, name-stealing company. And so the open-ended, Minecraft-like builder LEGO Worlds has some problem what with immature idiots' propensity to build cock. ...

 
 
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Friday Night Fights - Get Over Here!

Guys, I have a problem. I'm thirsty as hell. Not for some sweet meat slapping, but for blood. Your blood. Someone needs to hit me up on Xbox or PC for some Mortal Kombat X action. I have 9 Komplete on PC as well. LET'S DO THIS THANG! I need...

 
 




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Mary Skelter: Nightmares"A bloody good blobber"

 

Crazy Rich Asians"The romantic comedy that hot Asians deserved"

 

La-Mulana 2"Eg-Lana awaits"

 

Slender Man"He's just standing there... MENACINGLY"

 

Flipping Death"A true spiritual successor"

 

We Happy Few"What's all this, then?"

 
 
 

Community Blogs | expand

 

Quickposts expand | +quickpost

Gamemaniac3434

Got rocket league for Yeah, pretty enjoyable game

 
TurboJasper

Krampus is one of the best monster Dont look me in the

 
Hlarge4d6

Not hearing alot of chatter on here for Who is excited? Who is getting it day I will be Really want to support Tomb Maybe ill grab it in But it looks awesome! Even if he is defecating on Aretha Franklins

 
whatsacow

My cat is super on heat and screaming at the top of her lungs Its confusing the fuck out of the possums who live in the tree out the The vet here isnt free to do a desexing for another 2

 
Riobux

Sorry for being late, but Maverick just got teased/announced for Rainbow Six Siege Gosh hes actually pretty damn Like a total pretty

 
J Jason Rodriguez

This was my favorite Carpool Karaoke of all time growing up as a fan of Beatles Corden will also have a mini-docu/behind-the-scenes with Paul McCartney on CBS next Cant

 
CaimDark Reloaded

Until Dawn is surprisingly good, and really drives home the need for Telltale to significantly upgrade their else played it and how did your playthrough go?

 
Kerrik52

Persona 5 beaten after 111 hours! What a great, if bloated The first palace and the time management sucked, the plot cheated for a twist, the music was ok, its style is amazeballs, fusion is finally good and Makoto was best Onto the next JRPG!

 
Seymour

This brought back a lot of great memories! And, I need to watch Action Point! His final injury story about that was That adorable laugh at the end,

 
 

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