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#Also cocks


 
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Too cocky!

Here's a tale of a flex gone horribly wrong. At this weekend's VSFighting tournament in England, Joshua "Rycroft" Podesta had Yota "Pekos" Kachi on the ropes in Samurai Shodown. After absorbing a super, Pekos was left with just a ...

 
 
 
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Wanking Simulator achieves release this fall

I'd normally save this sort of thing for my weekly weird games roundup, but I was too excited to restrain myself. I was practically turgid with anticipation, and the only way to sate my raging emotion was to whip it out and spread the news ...

 
 
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Contest: Win a Switch copy of Safety First!

The name of the game is safety in today's contest for a Switch copy of Safety First! I don't think I've ever been this happy in my entire life. Seriously. Well, maybe once. But this is definitely the second happiest I've ever been. And it's...

 
 
 
 
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Keep your dingus warm in SCUM's Winter update

Tis the season for murdering each other on a prison island, so SCUM is getting into the festivities with a new update. To get your winter wonderland on, players will be able to explore a snow covered map, get into snowball fights and sled d...

 
 
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Contest: Win Breathedge for Steam

Ready for some more free games? Today Breathedge is up for grabs -- don't miss out on this contest! I don't know of many games where an immortal chicken is used as a tool to break things, plug leaky pipes, and scan electronic equipment. In ...

 
 
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Review: Genital Jousting

Gaming is such a strange and wonderful hobby. You can play in recreations of history’s greatest moments, explore alien planets, race in futuristic space craft and now play as a big floppy penis that is trying to insert itself in the a...

 
 
 
 from  japanator
 
 
 
 from  our Community Blogs
 
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From our community  

How to Self-Destructoid

[With emotions riding high in the community, Deadmoon shares with us why exactly it is he loves this crazy, broken Dtoid family. <3 ~ JuIc3] A lot of my friends make fun of me when I tell them that I'm an active part of an online communi...

 
 
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My introduction to the Destructoid tip line

So, one of the main benefits of joining the writing staff here is that I've been included on the tip line. Basically, anyone in the world can send an e-mail to [email protected], and the writing staff can sort through those submissions a...

 
 
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YouPorn eSports team banned by league

YouPorn, which my colleagues tell me is a supplier of online "adult" entertainment, sponsors an eSports team, Team YP. It has since 2014, back when I wrote, "More like spornsporning an eSporn team." Hah, nice. Unfortunately, this relationsh...

 
 
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Hot Mess: 10 Years of Destructoid party photos

There's something about the Mr. Destructoid helmet that brings out the animal in people. I've seen sheepish tiny McChicken-like boys turn into fearless crotch-thrusters, running up on stages and doing what three shots of Jager could not aff...

 
 
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Friday Night Fights - Happer Nooo Yur!

Dear lord it's bright. Worked till 6am, drank till 8 and back up at 12pm. Choices. Ugh. It's almost 1pm and I need to go back to work. At least it's Friday and it's a short, 4hr shift. It's the little things. Now excuse me, there's ham on m...

 
 
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Destructoid's award for Overall Best Game of 2015 goes to...

The downfall of Japanese game development has been greatly exaggerated. It sort of reminds me of what happened a century ago, when Dr. Kellogg introduced Kellogg's Corn Flakes in hopes that it would reduce masturbation. Kellogg devoted much...

 
 
 




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Superliminal"I have a dream..."

 

Afterparty"Fight for your Right"

 

Falcon Northwest 20th Anniversary Talon"All custom PCs come with a price"

 

Disco Elysium"Good cop"

 

Disney Tsum Tsum Festival"Mickey-o Party"

 

Mobile Suit Gundam: Battle Operation 2"I wonder if the original had this many issues"

 

Planet Zoo"Do it for Matt Damon"

 

Ring Fit Adventure"We don't need no stinkin' gym"

 

Final Fantasy XIV: Shadowbringers (Patch 5.1)"Vows of Virtue, Deeds of Cruelty"

 
 
 

Community Blogs | expand

 

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Ray Porreca

howdy Im headed to Anime NYC this for work this weekend, so if any Dtoiders will be at the show, holler at

 
Electric Reaper

The higher-ups at Google and Youtube are seriously fucked in the Some level of automated software is necessary to deal with the huge amount of data Youtube and Google interact However, using bots to BAN people is incredibly fucking

 
ZombieC0RPS

So the funniest thing happened on the Dtoid stream Link in the comments!

 
DiVISIVE Shinobi

Made A little poll for my

 
NeoTurbo

Aw sweet, I finally got to Part 2 in Fire Emblem Three Houses! *Realizes Im almost 50 hours in* HOW LONG IS THIS GAME!?

 
PLANET P1SS 69

Everytime I see Angela White, I think of When I touch myself to her, I feel like hes an energy in the room that is proud the way a parent might be when their child does sonething So then its weird again that its

 
bong264

My little trip down nostalgia road has Medal of Honor is old and jank but i still had a decent Also finally got to see the ending with my own eyes as my old disc would always freeze at mission

 
Blanchimont

I really hope the next Fire Emblem game goes back to the days of Awakening and The timetable system combined with the monthly cycles in Three Houses really sucked a lot of fun out of the series for I cant even bother to finish Maddening

 
Mike Sounders

Been powering through Iron-Blooded Orphans to avoid Cross Rays spoiling it for Done season 1, might be my favorite opening half of a gundam Also I adore how brutal it is at times due to more of a focus on non-laser

 
MeanderBot

CHRISTMAS CAME EARLY TODAY DANG

 
 

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