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Wanking Simulator achieves release this fall

I'd normally save this sort of thing for my weekly weird games roundup, but I was too excited to restrain myself. I was practically turgid with anticipation, and the only way to sate my raging emotion was to whip it out and spread the news ...

 
 
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Contest: Win a Switch copy of Safety First!

The name of the game is safety in today's contest for a Switch copy of Safety First! I don't think I've ever been this happy in my entire life. Seriously. Well, maybe once. But this is definitely the second happiest I've ever been. And it's...

 
 
 
 
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Keep your dingus warm in SCUM's Winter update

Tis the season for murdering each other on a prison island, so SCUM is getting into the festivities with a new update. To get your winter wonderland on, players will be able to explore a snow covered map, get into snowball fights and sled d...

 
 
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Contest: Win Breathedge for Steam

Ready for some more free games? Today Breathedge is up for grabs -- don't miss out on this contest! I don't know of many games where an immortal chicken is used as a tool to break things, plug leaky pipes, and scan electronic equipment. In ...

 
 
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Review: Genital Jousting

Gaming is such a strange and wonderful hobby. You can play in recreations of history’s greatest moments, explore alien planets, race in futuristic space craft and now play as a big floppy penis that is trying to insert itself in the a...

 
 
 
 from  japanator
 
 
 
 from  our Community Blogs
 
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From our community  

How to Self-Destructoid

[With emotions riding high in the community, Deadmoon shares with us why exactly it is he loves this crazy, broken Dtoid family. <3 ~ JuIc3] A lot of my friends make fun of me when I tell them that I'm an active part of an online communi...

 
 
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My introduction to the Destructoid tip line

So, one of the main benefits of joining the writing staff here is that I've been included on the tip line. Basically, anyone in the world can send an e-mail to [email protected], and the writing staff can sort through those submissions a...

 
 
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YouPorn eSports team banned by league

YouPorn, which my colleagues tell me is a supplier of online "adult" entertainment, sponsors an eSports team, Team YP. It has since 2014, back when I wrote, "More like spornsporning an eSporn team." Hah, nice. Unfortunately, this relationsh...

 
 
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Hot Mess: 10 Years of Destructoid party photos

There's something about the Mr. Destructoid helmet that brings out the animal in people. I've seen sheepish tiny McChicken-like boys turn into fearless crotch-thrusters, running up on stages and doing what three shots of Jager could not aff...

 
 
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Friday Night Fights - Happer Nooo Yur!

Dear lord it's bright. Worked till 6am, drank till 8 and back up at 12pm. Choices. Ugh. It's almost 1pm and I need to go back to work. At least it's Friday and it's a short, 4hr shift. It's the little things. Now excuse me, there's ham on m...

 
 
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Destructoid's award for Overall Best Game of 2015 goes to...

The downfall of Japanese game development has been greatly exaggerated. It sort of reminds me of what happened a century ago, when Dr. Kellogg introduced Kellogg's Corn Flakes in hopes that it would reduce masturbation. Kellogg devoted much...

 
 
 
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Friday Night Fights - Ch-ch-ch-chaaaanges

Well isn't this Hunky Dory? A nice little Friday. We have a new Call of Duty to play together. We have a new Fallout to play with ourselves (HA! HA!). We have herpes. Wait, that's just me. My bad. "So shut up and tell us what's changing Mik...

 
 
 




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Reviews   filter by...

Total War: Three Kingdoms"Can anyone provide me with a decent challenge?!"

 

Observation"Role reversal"

 

Layers of Fear 2"Quiet on the set"

 

Spark the Electric Jester 2"The cure for the Adventure itch"

 

Lapis X Labyrinth"Stacks on stacks on stacks"

 

Rage 2"Against the Machine 2"

 

Everybody's Golf VR"It's all in the hips"

 

Bubsy - Paws on Fire!"What could possibly go wrong?"

 

A Plague Tale - Innocence"Bless the Beasts and Children"

 

Team Sonic Racing"All-star?"

 
 
 

Community Blogs | expand

 

Quickposts expand | +quickpost

Zer0t0nin

There are days where I love the just finished Dark Souls Still getting goosebumps upon entering the Kiln of the first flame)

 
Sam van der Meer

The world’s first Kojima Direct?

 
Riff Raff

I did a blog about the internets two favorite things, lists and Give it a look and leave your picks :) Thanks and have a purrfect day!

 
JcDent

Mods are asleep, post all of youre troops to honor the Mammarial

 
Riff Raff

Have a great week all! I hope you put Tacos in your A lot!

 
Tohsaka

Worked the graphical artifacts set Kinda nifty running emulation at a nice rate of speed for 15 minutes only for a core dump to happen because the GPU loses its Dont breath to this,

 
JcDent

Prolly the best of character art in the entire Degenesis: Rebirth

 
TysonOfTime

Took 9000 wyrmite, 10 single tickets and one 10-ticket, complete with Annelie fake-out, but after a grand total of 100 summons, I got my Dragon Stockpiling really does

 
CaimDark Reloaded

Is the Crystal Guardian a mandatory boss in Holow Knight? Stupid jerk is sitting right on the checkpoint, which means everytime I die I have an annoying climb back to where he And I always

 
JcDent

Communism checklist: Fully Automated Luxury Gay Space

 
 

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