dark        
 
 

#Also cocks


Friday Night Fights photo

Friday Night Fights - Ch-ch-ch-chaaaanges

Well isn't this Hunky Dory? A nice little Friday. We have a new Call of Duty to play together. We have a new Fallout to play with ourselves (HA! HA!). We have herpes. Wait, that's just me. My bad. "So shut up and tell us what's changing Mik...

 
 
 
 
 
Rustic photo

Rust soft launches female avatars, 'you never had a choice'

Back when I was telling you about how Rust automatically generates penis size based on Steam ID, a footnote to that article was that female player models were on their way to the survival sandbox, too. Well, this momentous addition was anno...

 
 
Rustic photo

Rustic: Rust generates avatar cock size by Steam ID

Haha, rustic. I think it's time for Jordan to take another Rust adventure. The open world survival sim is fascinating. It recently made headlines when players flipped out after it randomly assigned face and skin tone to users' Steam IDs. An...

 
 
Don't get cocky photo

Expensive dick moderation helped kill the last LEGO MMO

Someone think about the children! Like my own personal brand, LEGO is a family-friendly, name-stealing company. And so the open-ended, Minecraft-like builder LEGO Worlds has some problem what with immature idiots' propensity to build cock. ...

 
 
 photo

Friday Night Fights - Get Over Here!

Guys, I have a problem. I'm thirsty as hell. Not for some sweet meat slapping, but for blood. Your blood. Someone needs to hit me up on Xbox or PC for some Mortal Kombat X action. I have 9 Komplete on PC as well. LET'S DO THIS THANG! I need...

 
 
 photo

Friday Night Fights - Goodbye Sweet Prince

I don't even have it in my heart to 'shop your face into those penguin eyes. Our fearless Boner Knight: Andy Dixon is leaving us as Community Manager. From the first time I was an asshole to you Andy, to the last time I was an asshole to yo...

 
 
 from  our Community Blogs
Mario Kart dicks photo
From our community  

Who put all these dicks in Mario Kart?

[Where will Dtoid community blogger Hyper Lemon Buster Cannon find dicks next?? --Mr Andy Dixon] You know, if there's one important observation I've noticed throughout the years, it's that if you look hard enough, like really really hard, y...

 
 
Sporting YP photo

YouPorn is sponsoring an eSports team

YouPorn, which a cursory Google search tells me is a streaming adult video webpage, has announced its sponsorship of a Spanish eSports team (Hearthstone, League of Legends). Play2Win will now be known as Team YP, which sounds like some...

 
 
Xbox porn photo

Hardcore pornography CONFIRMED for Next Xbox

SugarDVD, purveyor of such fine films as What An Asshole and Hairy Asian Schoolgirls Masturbate, has confirmed it'll be bringing its adult entertainment streaming services to Microsoft's next-generation Xbox.  The service is already of...

 
 
 from  our Community Blogs
Promoted cock blog photo
From our community  

Promoted blog: Gaming's greatest cocks

[Destructoid turned seven this past Saturday, and all month long Dtoiders have been reminiscing about their time with the site over in our Community Blogs. Here's Handy's little dandy. Show us yours! --Mr Andy Dixon] We have a little saying...

 
 
 
HAWP photo

HAWP: Oh Ash, your diplomacy is so thick and hard

This is... well... umm... you know what? I'm not even going to explain it. The latest Hey Ash, Whatcha Playin'? is brilliance, plain and simple. Go watch it and have a good laugh or two. Hey Ash, Whatcha Playin'? - Civilization V [GameTrai...

 
 
 photo

Goodbye, Destructoid

As some of you may or may not have heard, this is officially my last day with Destructoid. Man ... I can barely type that without getting upset. I am starting a new job next week at GolinHarris as a writer for Nintendo. It is an absolute dr...

 
 
 photo

The DTOID Show: Assassin's Creed DLC, Star Wars, & Porno

On today's completely professional, mature, and otherwise not stupid or embarrassing Destructoid Show, we discuss some very serious topics. First, a season pass is announced for Assassin's Creed III, and the first DLC will be set in an alt...

 
 
 photo
From our community  

Destructoid Community Meetup Photos!

Yeah we're a web site, but we are also a collective of fleshy sacks of meat and blood that play video games together and drink sometimes!  In an effort to centralize our random adventures and always have a place to show random photos a...

 
 
 photo

Swordfight will get your joystick hard

I stand corrected. This is the weirdest story of the weekend! If you read Joseph Leray's "Nordic New Wave" feature from the other week, you ought to be familiar with Johann Sebastian Joust, a game using accelerometer-powered controllers and...

 
 
 photo

Namco Bandai pulls penis-flavored SoulCalibur V ad

[Update: So apparently it is not real. Stupid sexy Voldo!] Namco Bandai recently pulled an advert for SoulCalibur V after fans complained that it was too offensive. No, it wasn't the magazine page featuring ginormous breasts. It was an post...

 
 
 photo

The DTOID Show: Our Top Gaming Moments Of 2011!

Merry Christmas, everybody! I'm gonna keep this short because idiot thought it was a good idea to put a small tree in my house and then leave a bunch of presents sitting under it, so I need to go get rid of that crap before anybody trips on...

 
 
 photo

Fruit Ninja Kinect unleashes my ninja penis

I refused to rearrange my living room to play Fruit Ninja in my girlfriend's tiny San Francisco flat, so after a few failed attempts at calibration I just jumped behind the sofa, causing my body to turn into a floating severed torso.  ...

 
 
 photo

When eroges get motion controls

According to Maniac, the Japanese developer Tech Arts is working on a title called 3D Custom Girl, which will be released at the end of October. The women present in the game cover pretty much every single Anime cliché in the book. T...

 
 
 photo

Skyrim demo sends woman into labor

[Update: Chaz and Stevi joined us in the Outer Heaven chat last night (Chaz has been following Destructoid for years) and we got the chance to talk with the soon-to-be parents. Because of the pregnancy, the wedding (planned for this past we...

 
 
 photo

Octocock

Ladies and gentlemen, it would appear that The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time 3D will feature Cthulhu's penis as a regular enemy. 

 
 




Reviews   filter by...

Lego The Incredibles"Let's be real, this is the best Fantastic Four game we're ever gonna get"

 

Skyrim Very Special Edition"Alexa, cross the rickety bridge"

 

Jurassic World Evolution"Spare no expense! Because it doesn't matter anyway"

 

Splatoon 2: Octo Expansion"I'm an expansion now"

 

Shaq Fu - A Legend Reborn"Shaq is back, but kinda wack"

 

Fortnite (Switch)"Build a fort, last the night (wait it's basically just battle royale now)"

 

Incredibles 2"Jack Jack, baby"

 

Tag"The Hawkeye movie you never knew you wanted"

 

Unravel Two"It takes two, baby! (But not really)"

 

Won't You Be My Neighbor?"You will always find people who are helping"

 
 
 

Community Blogs | expand

 

Quickposts expand | +quickpost

Steel Squirrel

I know Im late to party, but god damn Nioh is I havent been this entertained with an action game since the original Devil May It fills that void Ninja Gaiden left behind, but also brings so much more to the So pumped for 2

 
Electric Reaper

Xi Jinpings domestic policy is Also, that propaganda video he made is a war

 
TysonOfTime

Best part of a new Smash Bros -- we get these great music remixes while we wait for it to come out! 😍

 
Hypno

FFXII Update: Finished Dreadnought Heard something about stealing from a wolf mob outside of The first Got a dagger from I now kill everything in 1 hit and Fran is still

 
Dennis Carden

Oh, I forgot to post something for Oh Have some Goblin Goblin Cock are I do like me some Goblin

 
Classic bong264

Brother Goriel of the Blood done by me :P just a few touch ups and he is ready to serve the EMPRAH! I really love the battle scars and missing eye on this guy, some really good character this

 
Electric Reaper

Raccoons They spread rabies, damage my property, and steal my cats Now theres another raccoon for the local

 
Michformer

3446 words later, my design article on the art of weaving an engrossing atmosphere in games is more or less Going to give it a polish pass before letting it Had tons of fun with this For me, atmosphere makes/breaks a

 
Lex

Right now I wish I could take screenshots in my PS3 guess Ill have to wait till emulation works

 
 

Upcoming

More Previews
 

Destructoid Originals

More Originals
 
 
 
BACK NEXT