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Andrew Kauz
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A line in the sandbox: L.A. Noire's closed open world

In January of 2011, Rockstar offered a proclamation with no room for alternate interpretations: "L.A. Noire is not a sandbox game." There it was, clear as day, telling us that this seemingly open world crime-solving videogame woul...   read

 
 
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Portal 2, Dragon Age 2, and dirty filthy lies

You've picked up a controller to play the latest game from your favorite development team. It's called Policemanofficer 2, and to the best of your knowledge, its similarities to Policemanofficer 1 are clear and expected. You'll take control...   read

 
 
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2010 sucked: Originality, disappointment, and the future

[For this month's Musing, the topic got me thinking about the future as much as the year past. Want to write your own musing? Head over to the Cblogs and post your thoughts.] When you’re someone who writes about videogames, it’s...   read

 
 
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Review: NBA 2K11

Questions about which NBA game released in 2010 would come out on top ceased with Electronic Arts' announcement that the first installment in its new NBA Elite series would be delayed to 2011 due to concerns about its polish. Since NBA 2K...   read

 
 
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Keep your pants on while viewing these Cargasm screens

I still can't wrap my head around the name Cargasm. Is it an orgasm of cars? Are the cars enjoying orgasms? Are the drivers? Should players expect to experience a cargasm while playing? Because if so, I'd like to know what I'm getting mysel...   read

 
 
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No Heroes Allowed! coming to PSP, doesn't allow heroes

Remember back when the Badman series was called the Badman series? You know, back before the whole "This sounds too much like Batman so change it or we'll take all your money" thing happened. The series went strong with two games unde...   read

 
 
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Crackdown 2 DLC is broken, don't buy it

Ruffian Games has given players another reason not to play Crackdown 2 today, as its just-released DLC pack, the Toy Box add-on, seems to only take things away from the game. Namely, its ability to function. Ruffian has pointed to a po...   read

 
 
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Celebrate Thong Friday by watching this DeathSpank video

Thong Friday is now a thing. Take off whatever lesser underwear you're currently donning and squeeze into your sexiest neon-colored thong. Do not send us videos. Instead, watch this new story trailer for the upcoming DeathSpank: Thongs of ...   read

 
 
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Rocksteady has a complete build of Batman: Arkham City

The Batman is very pleased this day. His next adventure, Batman: Arkham City, is "complete," playable from start to finish and in need only of some tender polishing.  The information was discovered on a recent OPM podcast (#11 for thos...   read

 
 
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Red 5 announces FireFall for PC, lets you shoot bugs

Red 5 Studios announced today a new team-based shooter, FireFall, due to be released some time in 2011. And it has bugs. Nasty, disgusting bugs. I can only assume that they must all die. The game is being developed by a team made up of des...   read

 
 


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Action-RPG Bastion revealed for PC and consoles

I get more than a little giddy every time I see the words "new action-RPG," and the full reveal of Bastion from Supergiant Games is no different. Couple that with the promise of an unusually emotional experience and you just might hea...   read

 
 
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New screens, trailer capture essence of FEAR 3

  If you ask me, there just aren't enough games with scary-ass pregnant ladies. At least we have FEAR 3, which Warner Brothers and Day 1 Studios is showing off in this brand-new trailer.  While we may not see FEAR 3 until 2011 now...   read

 
 
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Videogames and the pursuit of harmless entertainment

[Editor's Note: We're not just a (rad) news site -- we also publish opinions/editorials from our community & employees like this one, though be aware that it may not jive with the opinions of Destructoid as a whole, or how our moms rais...   read

 
 
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The rubbing of breasts on faces in Dragon Quest IX

The Dragon Quest saga began for me in earnest only with Dragon Quest VIII. I had played previous games in the series, but not in any capacity other than "OK let's do this oh WTF this is shit?" I never even got around to finishing DQVIII ...   read

 
 
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The restoration of faith in Dragon Quest IX, part two

[Editor's Note: We're not just a (rad) news site -- we also publish opinions/editorials from our community & employees like this one, though be aware that it may not jive with the opinions of Destructoid as a whole, o...   read

 
 
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The restoration of faith in Dragon Quest IX, part one

[Editor's Note: We're not just a (rad) news site -- we also publish opinions/editorials from our community & employees like this one, though be aware that it may not jive with the opinions of Destructoid as a whole, or ...   read

 
 
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Violence, mystery, and meaning in the dark world of Limbo

[Editor's Note: We're not just a (rad) news site -- we also publish opinions/editorials from our community & employees like this one, though be aware that it may not jive with the opinions of Destructoid as a whole, or ...   read

 
 
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Why games should play the player

[Editor's Note: We're not just a (rad) news site -- we also publish opinions/editorials from our community & employees like this one, though be aware that it may not jive with the opinions of Destructoid as a whole, or how ...   read

 
 
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Death, storytelling, and the manipulation of progress

For years, we've heard the same tired proclamations about the limitations of storytelling in videogames. This argument stands apart from the talent involved in making games; it's not that the people making games are poor writers, but tha...   read

 
 
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Forced morality in games will never, ever work

[Editor's Note: We're not just a (rad) news site -- we also publish opinions/editorials from our community & employees like this one, though be aware that it may not jive with the opinions of Destructoid as a whole, or how ou...   read

 
 
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Open-world mission design is awful, let's fix it

[Editor's Note: We're not just a (rad) news site -- we also publish opinions/editorials from our community & employees like this one, though be aware that it may not jive with the opinions of Destructoid as a whole, or how our ...   read

 
 
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The world needs to stop revolving around protagonists

Videogames are intimately familiar with the concept of the hero; Games seem built for protagonists, with worlds pieced together and relationships formed to benefit the hero's journey. Yet a strange thing occurred to me recently: many of ...   read

 
 
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Love, loneliness, and companionship in our Fragile Dreams

[Editor's Note: We're not just a (rad) news site -- we also publish opinions/editorials from our community & employees like this one, though be aware that it may not jive with the opinions of Destructoid as a whole, or how our ...   read

 
 
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A charming skull-laden kickass world: The art of Brutal Legend

It has been said so many times that it now borders upon a meaningless cliché, but the fact remains: a lot of games look the same. I'm not going to lament the propagation of brown color palettes, generic RPG characters, or any othe...   read

 
 
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Something about sex: Videogame items that sound inadvertently sexual

[Editor's Note: We're not just a (rad) news site -- we also publish opinions/editorials from our community & employees like this one, though be aware that it may not jive with the opinions of Destructoid as a whole, or how our moms ...   read

 
 
Andrew KauzFeatured blogger

I have others as well that you can check out on my blog. You'll enjoy them or your money back. Since it seems like the cool thing to do, here a list of my favorite games that is coming straigh...

 


 


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Hitman: Colorado"LET'S GO DENVER"

 

Forza Horizon 3"Crocodile Dandy"

 

Sonic Boom: Fire & Ice"Speeding into obscurity"

 

PowerA Fusion Controller for Xbox One"More buttons, more sticks, less money"

 

River City: Tokyo Rumble"Kickin' ass and takin' coins"

 
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SpielerDad

Theres two tatted, screaming, roid-raging lunkheads at the gym this I wake and workout at the asscrack of dawn to specifically avoid these Did they confuse AM with PM?

 
teethmynow

@teethmynow

 
teethmynow

I love Destructoid!

 
Khalid Eternal Nigh

When you win offense match in under a minute after enemy team talked shit whole previous

 
JcDent

The tank is LANDSHIP, not a SHIP!

 
Dreamweaver

You know, its natural for me to get depressed by examples of good writing, because it exemplifies how worthless I am compared to But now that Im actually applauding a 26-page hentai manga for their WRITING, maybe I really am worthless after

 
JcDent

Like if the Hungarians can strap two mig 21 engines to a T34 and keep it turreted, you should be able to find some way to stick a 150mm howitzer on top of a tank

 
Dr Mel

You set up your toilet paper nest in the work bathroom all nice for making the good clean poopoos, but it has an autoflusher so before you sit it flushes and vomits public toilet water all over your precision crafted nest and blows half of it loose!

 

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