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Joel Peterson
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Battletoads can kiss my ass

I learned something this week. I learned that humanity is a giant dumpster just waiting to be tipped over by a reasonably sized space rock. I learned that the only consolation for the insanity and the atrocities we have committed as a speci...

 
 
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Review: Retro-Bit RES Plus HDMI NES console

Right off the bat, I typically don’t like clone consoles. I’m a total retro snob for the most part; not a collector but extremely picky about the accuracy of my old games. A couple of years ago I had to sell the majority of my c...

 
 
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Early Access impressions for Citadel: Forged with Fire

I’ve been on a survival kick lately. I think it had something to do with hanging out in forests and beaches during the entirety of my holiday and coming back to marathon episodes of Survivorman with Les Stroud. Whatever the case, my c...

 
 
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Sociable Soccer hits Early Access this summer

I couldn't give a hot shit about most sports titles. I don't really watch sports, can't be bothered with players, teams or stats, but there is something about the older days of sports video games that I find a lot of fun. Classics such as T...

 
 
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Hackers uncover long lost Super Mario Bros. 2 enemy

I want to preface by saying I don't hate any of you. It might feel that way when you watch the poorly made video I took of a brand new enemy in Super Mario Bros. 2 that was discovered by a couple of clever ROM hackers I found on Twitter, bu...

 
 
 

It's a Joel heavy front page day today. I apologize in advance for the smell.

 
 
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That big Yooka-Laylee patch is out now on consoles

A while back I reported on the big Yooka-Laylee patch out on PC that fixed a number of bugs, added a few user friendly features to the game, and just generally improved the overall experience. While the Switch port is still not here yet, th...

 
 
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Review: Slime Rancher

I might be the wrong person to write this review simply because I can’t get over cuteness and charm, which was pretty much all I was expecting to enjoy about Slime Rancher. Farming sims have always held little interest for me mainly b...

 
 
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Etrian Odyssey V: Beyond the Myth hits North America Oct. 17

Most of my handheld collection is comprised of RPG's. There is nothing like lounging on the couch or laying in bed and getting lost in an adventure, and one of my favorite franchises on the DS and 3DS is the Etrian Odyssey series, not only ...

 
 
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Goodbye, meatworld -- Gal*Gun VR is available on Steam

When I was a kid, I used to imagine what a VR version of Super Metroid would be like. The picture I had in my head was almost exactly like what Metroid Prime would end up being, a first-person view through the eyes of Samus. We haven't quit...

 
 
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The best Contra game was released 23 years ago today

Sega Genesis owners were blessed; we got the most badass, coolest cyberpunk Contra game at the time when all of those Nintendo wussies were playing Contra III: The Alien Wars. Contra: Hard Corps was a tough-as-nails heavy metal album cover ...

 
 
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Atari announces Tempest 4000, Jeff Minter involved

The very first thing I posted on Destructoid as a staff writer was a love letter to Jeff Minter, the creator of Tempest 2000 for the Atari Jaguar, the “visualizer” you see on many consoles and PCs when you put a music CD in, and...

 
 
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Expedition is a tabletop RPG on an NES cartridge

A few months ago, my friends and wife and I got together for a game of old school Advanced Dungeons and Dragons. I’ve played every edition to come out since, but there has always been something appealing about the more chaotic, unorga...

 
 
 
 

Pigs are fucking flying today, and Grimoire has finally been released after more than 20 years in development! Updated my recent article to reflect this. https://www.destructoid.com/a-pc-rpg-22-years-in-the-works-has-missed-release-day-again-452578.phtml

 
 
 
 
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Dank Tomb and the PICO-8 Fantasy Console

A few months ago, a surprise landed in my mail called the PocketCHIP. It was a surprise because I had forgotten I had pre-ordered it, and it ended up getting lost in translation for the better part of four months. A handheld micro-computer ...

 
 
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Three games in the Tales series are on sale on Steam

Tales of Berseria came and went for me. My backlog was huge at the time (and still is) so I never got to experience it. I have sporadically played different entries in the franchise over the years, enjoying Tales of Symphonia most of all. T...

 
 
 
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Celebrating 25 Years of Ecco the Dolphin

I just got back from a family vacation and have been feeling pretty burned out. For my wife, kids, and I, it was the first significant journey we took anywhere; a mere 14-hour road trip which might not seem like much, but with two kids in t...

 
 
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[Update] Sega Genesis Flashback is not being well received

[Disclaimer: I have to apologise. This piece was originally written to be a little too inflammatory, and was not well thought out. I have no direct experience with this device but wanted to comment on clone consoles in general, having exper...

 
 
 

Bubsy was ahead of it's time; it did fall damage before Mario ever did. Check fucking mate Nintendo.

 
 
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Doom is free on PS4 this weekend

I'm sure most people with any interest in the genre have probably gotten around to playing Doom. It's one of the best FPS games around, and I'm speaking as a huge fan of the original games. In a bit of a surprise move, Bethesda recently ann...

 
 
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Eskimo Bob is a new NES game out on Steam

It's been a lot of fun playing new games for impressions and reviews, but I am an old man now. I have at least ten gray hairs, maybe more. And I'm really stuck in the past. So when I discovered Eskimo Bob: Starring Alfonzo today on Steam, b...

 
 


About Joel Petersonone of us since 8:14 AM on 11.07.2013

I write the things other people don't write, with liberal fart jokes thrown in for good measure. I like old games, old computers, old consoles, and old pizza.


Here are some blogs what I done did and were promoted to the front page.



Location: The Cold And The Beautiful



The Great Quest of Stupid



Fathers Day



I Have No VR And I Must Scream
 
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