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Gus TT Showbiz
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My girlfriend told me she was leaving me because I keep pretending to be a Transformer. I said, "No, wait! I can change."

 
 
 

I had a crazy dream last night! I was swimming in an ocean of orange soda. Turns out it was just a Fanta sea.

 
 
 

eBay is so useless. I tried to look up lighters and all they had was 13,749 matches.

 
 
 

Three conspiracy theorists walk into a bar. You can't tell me that's just a coincidence!

 
 
 

I'm gonna try a thing. I'm gonna nominate someone and say a nice thing or two about them. That person has to then do the same and so on I nominate Frosty. He's a kind generous soul and I'm glad to have met him both here and IRL. #PositivityForward

 
 
 

I used to have a fear of hurdles, but I got over it.

 
 
 

My ceiling isn’t the best, but it’s up there.

 
 
 

Happy birthday, lettuce turnip the beet!

 
 
 
 

I hate sleeping weirdly. It's a real pain in the neck.

 
 
 
 

How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together.

 
 
 

Strating Cyberpukn 2077 in a baes ps4 today atfer finally dowlnaoding teh limek 45 GB updtaes. Juts I remember smoe people in reviews gonig nuts that hey doing convesrations adn selecting to tlak to people is so seemless and better thne usula pressa.Waht?

 
 
 

I meant to look for my missing watch, but I could never find the time.

 
 
 

Never criticize someone until you have walked a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you’ll be a mile away, and you’ll have their shoes.

 
 
 

Three guys are on a boat with four cigarettes, but with nothing to light them with. So they throw one overboard and the boat becomes a cigarette lighter

 
 
 

I was feeling depressed, so a friend put her hand on my shoulder and said Earth. It meant the world to me.

 
 
 

I’d like to cut back on the Thanksgiving leftovers, but I can’t quit cold turkey.

 
 
 

6:30 is the best time on the clock. Hands down.

 
 
 

I tried picking up Fallen Order again after I stopped playing for a while. As the ever wise Gandalf once said: "I have no memory of this place."

 
 
 
 

Where do shellfish go to borrow money? The prawn broker

 
 
 

The rotation of the Earth really makes my day.

 
 
 

Cleaning mirrors is a job I could really see myself doing.

 
 
 

I can't believe I got fired from the calendar factory. All I did was take a day off.

 
 


About Gus TT Showbizone of us since 10:54 AM on 05.23.2013

A purveyor of puns to those with a discerning taste.

My birthday is April 28th.

Does anybody really read this?

 
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