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TheIntern
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I had a dream I became a really famous and prolific writer, but I was in a terrible accident and they put me in the wheelchair they gave Captain Pike but instead of beeping once for yes, twice for no, the buttons said "yes, please" and "crackers."


 
 
 
 

Have you ever had to crap so bad it gives you a panic attack?

 
 
 

Unsurprisingly, Rage 2 looks like it's amp'ing up to compete with Borderlands 3. Both publishers have had some really impressive pantshitting episodes recently, so who will get gold star?

 
 
 

Civvie 11's video on Dusk Episode 3 is just pure manly joy. He'll warn you himself but spoilers, kids. You've been warned.



 
 
 

Apologies to anyone stung over my "free DMCV" steam keys. It was intended as a prank to poke fun at the Comment issues Dtoid has having.



 
 
 

I got a few free Steam keys for DMCV, reply in the comments for yours.

 
 
 

More than ever, we need Doctor Doom. Give him your countries.

 
 
 

With games like Dusk, Ion Maiden, the upcoming Wrath being made, I'm really hoping there's a talented team out there somewhere making plans for a Thief homage. All they need is a good voice actor. And maybe a talented writer? *Waggles eyebrow*

 
 
 

One of my favorite video game gals was the female barbarian (aka Sonya) from Diablo 3. She was big, tough, no-nonsense, chaotic good, and fuggin' gorgeous. I don't know if that counts for #InternationalWomensDay but I had to listen to my heart.


 
 
 

Diablo is better, frustrating, shorter, and clunky as I remember it.

 
 
 

I was hoping to DM a D&D 5e campaign, set in the Magic: The Gathering Ravnica setting, but all my players opted out. I was even preparing homebrew character classes to sync up with their favorite decks and it was fun to work on. C'est la vie.

 
 
 

My starter Pokemon is Knife.

 
 
 

I have one piece of bacon left in my meal, and a pancake and some hashbrowns. I want to eat the bacon last, but if I eat everything else, the bacon will be cold. This is how society works.

 
 
 

There isn't a hand big enough, nor a forehead broad enough, to properly convey my feelings about Anthem right now.

 
 
 

Annnd somethin' for the ladies (and Mike).


 
 
 

Girl Monster Mondays.


 
 
 
 

I wonder if it bothers modern Satanists to see their religion being used as a cheap and easy protagonist in horror films. Satanists seem pretty mellow and level-headed these days.

 
 
 

Hey guys join me on tinycoffins dot com in 20 minutes for an AMA with PETA plus special guest star "Sturmfeurer69" aka Albert the Shrieking Neckbeard and his hug pillow of a newborn horse.

 
 
 

This year, like every year, I refuse to muster an interest in the Oscars. How about an award show for absolute ordinaries who keep going in the face of this nonsense? Best Mom With Busy Kids. Best Dancing Dog. Best Pronunciation of a Foreign Word. #Oscars

 
 
 

Oh, good. I was exploring the Aurora and the game just forced me out of the map into nullspace. My only option is to die of thirst. That's great. Thanks, Subnautica. Better games would at least give you a console for no-clip options, by way of apology.

 
 
 

I was subscribed to GGGManLives reviews, but after learning he was sponsored by EA to review Anthem, no longer. He's proven that his opinion has a price tag, and that's not something I can trust.



 
 
 

My gut is depressing me. Anyone got some decent weight loss advice that I won't immediately roll my eyes over, being the lazy cynic I am?

 
 
 

Ask not for whom the bell tolls, it tolls for thee, Bioware.

 
 


About TheInternone of us since 3:57 PM on 07.16.2015

Mike is a crazy, jobless hobo living in his parents' basement.
 
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