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Gusmas
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Just for Soulbow cause he complained in discord I wasn't posting enough: Seige Sucks. At first I thought the yoga instructor was lying, then I realized she was just stretching the truth.

 
 
 

What do you call an arrogant fugitive falling from a building? Condescending.

 
 
 

New years resolution for the bankrupt gardener was to forget the past and rely on the fuchsia.

 
 
 

The people stand up for royalty. The queen sits down for royal tea.

 
 
 

I tried wrapping Christmas presents, but I didn't have the gift. Merry Christmas everyone!

 
 
 

I found out Waldo wears stripes because he doesn't want to be spotted!

 
 
 

Why doesn’t Santa have any children ? Because he only comes once a year, and when he does, it’s down the chimney. Also, Merry Beermas!


 
 
 

What do you call a person rabid with wordplay? An energizer punny.

 
 
 

If Americans switched from pounds to kilograms, there would be mass confusion.

 
 
 

When the iron was invented there was a press conference.

 
 
 
 

Driving with one headlight isn't very bright.

 
 
 

I dislike it when people ask me what I'm doing in two years, it's not like I have 2020 vision!

 
 
 

Since I changed the color of my favorite monastic robes they have been stiff and uncomfortable. I guess old habits dye hard.

 
 
 

One of my friends suffered a grizzly death at the paws of a bear. A-bear-antly it's unacceptable to make puns at the funeral.

 
 
 

It was a sad day for the rattlesnake family, the time had come for the children to strike out on their own.

 
 
 

Just in time for Thanksgiving a blockbuster movie about sweet potatoes, "The Silence of the Yams".

 
 
 

In high school I recall having a beautiful but difficult math teacher. She was easy on the eyes and hard on the pupils!

 
 
 

Whoever invented the girdle got a bum wrap.

 
 
 
 
 

What is a shoe repairman's favorite dessert? Cobbler.


 
 
 

Whenever I go near my bank I get withdrawal symptoms.

 
 
 

I got a job in the transmission shop. It's shift work.

 
 
 

Communism first took off in the insect kingdom when a wary wasp joined the cagey bee.

 
 


About Gusmasone of us since 10:54 AM on 05.23.2013

A purveyor of puns to those with a discerning taste.

My birthday is April 28th.

 
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