The doctor couldn't transfer the organs because he didn't have the guts to do it. (TGIF everyone!)

When the prisoner was told by his lawyer that he had gotten a stay of execution, he smiled and said, "Well, no noose is good noose."

A couch is a remote location.

When his wife asked for wooden walls in the basement, they had a panel discussion.

The neurologist wanted to propose to his girl friend, but he just didn't have the nerve.

When he fell in the wet concrete he left a bad impression.

Paratroopers pull strings to stay on the job. Also TGIF

There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.

An elevator makes ghosts happy because it lifts the spirits.

Hey Chad, Kenya shake Djibouti while dancing the Congo?

When you're wearing a watch on an airplane, time flies.

I wanted to bid at the silent auction, but it was not aloud.

When one is afflicted with loss of balance they never quite know vertigo.

The high school music teacher was quite controversial. He told his students to read band books.

I got into a fight with a snail. It was a real slug-fest. Also bonus picture cause this weekend is MUCH needed.

A couple of ambulance drivers are a paramedics.

Why not take a break in the south of France? You've nothing Toulouse.

Two strangers skated to the middle of a frozen pond and broke the ice. They also broke through and died. It's really a chilling tale.

If you work in a forestry company you will probably have to log your time.

I see our friend is still around!

It's OK to borrow a book from the public library once in a while, but try not to overdue it.

When Wally discovered he had Lyme disease, he was really ticked off.

My battery had an alkaline problem, so it went to AA meetings.

Ever since I switched to wrinkle free shirts my laundry issues have been less pressing.

Finished StarCraft II, my angst against final "bosses" continue.