What do you call a boat full of polite football players? A good sportsman ship

I wanted to lose weight so I went to the paint store. I heard I could get thinner there.

After playing a couple hours of Yakuza 0 last night, I'm thinking I might be a fan

I couldn't wait til tomorrow soooo I'm streaming now, haha Hey all! I'm gonna stream Yakuza 0 tomorrow about 3 EST if anyone is interested! I've never played a Yakuza game, so we'll see how it goes! https://twitch.tv/perfectlybalancedgus

Cartoonist found dead in his home, details are sketchy.

Saw this today: Glass coffins, will they be popular? Remains to be seen!

I heard the Rock got married. I sure hope they don't let their marriage erode over time.

A completed jigsaw puzzle is a pieceful solution.

My addition to #bikeporntoid (Pic in the comments)

Hi, my name is Gus and I have an addiction with downloading PS4 Themes. #ConfessionToid

An author who wrote from his basement had a best cellar.

It's time to see our very own Torch play Siege! And die er um be a team player! Tune in here! https://www.twitch.tv/perfectlybalancedgus

#LockscreenToid

After a crap day at work. Here's a pun that helped cheer me up a bit: An office with many people and few electrical outlets could be in for a power struggle.

I don't like puns. #Heresytoid

A real life interaction with a friend

I will never breakup with my gym, we just seem to workout.

My dog failed his driving test, he can't parallel bark.

SoulBow yet again being divisive with his Qtoids. Don't worry Dtoid. I would marry you all, cause you're all breathtaking. Not in the murder me to take my breath away type either.

After periodic doubts about his vocational calling, the young chemistry teacher concluded he was out of his element.

I think Torch owes someone some G-fuel, I mean Siege.

#unwholesometoid Diarrhea is hereditary. It runs in your jeans.

I have been shopping for a trailer. Every time I think I have found a good one, there is a hitch.

Tennis players can never find happiness. Love means nothing to them.

The police held the boat thief at bay.