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Boxed Swine
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Because Star Wars is hot again, Disney would like to announce its own line of chewing tobacco: Chewbaccie. It comes in eight kid-friendly flavors and is available for purchase at truck stops only. Chewbaccie: Swallow, don't spit!

 
 
 

Hey, everyone. We know that money is tight and spirits are low because of Covid-19. So the U.S. government is proud to announce that we will be accepting Butts this next tax season. We'll pull up in one of our discrete vans and take a piece of your butt.

 
 
 

Anyone else expect Trump to pardon himself during this year's White House Turkey Pardoning event? "I pardon this Turkey, and myself, of all crimes committed against this great nation and humanity. God bless America, everybody." 4D Chess.

 
 
 

I know the Holidays are almost here, and people start to drink and weird things start getting posted. But this year lets avoid opening up MS Paint, drawing asterisk and then posting them in the comments joking that it's a cat's butthole, m'kay?

 
 
 

Let's just eat Pilgrims instead.

 
 
 

Im actually gay for EA. E(g)A(y), if you will. Im in love with EA.

 
 
 

Hello, fellow gamers. I had falsely said "EA blows" in the past, but after attending re-education classes at Camp EA, I can see that was libel. EA is a good company with fair deals, and is leading the way for gamers like us. I only buy EA now. Thanks EA!

 
 
 
 

LPT: Don't listen to Life Pro-tips, they're all bullshit made by cheats and liars.

 
 
 

LPT: Tired of your cans being right-side up so the tab is on top? Flip it upside down so the tab is on the bottom, silly!

 
 
 

Time for some Halloween pranks: egging houses, dog poop in lit bags, stealing tires off pickup trucks for crack. All the classics tonight.

 
 
 

Hey there, you like candy? You want something ... sweet? Well come on into my van AKA the comment section. I like Destructoid so much I thought I'd give them some exclusive Cyberpunk 2077 information and other treats. But you have hop in the comments.....

 
 
 

Hairpins are just butt plugs for your peehole.

 
 
 

Guys, we were wrong about 5G. The virus isnt coming from cell towers, it's coming from the Sun! The Sun has a thing called the "corona" and we have to stop it or the lizard people win! Come on, guys!

 
 
 

I want dental implants. Not sure why I want teeth with boobs, but I do.

 
 
 

Is the new Tremors movie actually kinda sad? My eyes are sweating a bit.

 
 
 

This guy says Beer Can Chicken is bullshit! If he's right, his video should be the first thing you find when you search Beer Can Chicken, and not these other users selling their snake oil recipes.



 
 
 

Why, no officer, this is Destructoid and we are not a cult of vampires. No need to bring 1 cop, 2 cops, 3 cops ha ha ha.

 
 
 

I'm glad the community is starting to take mobile gaming more seriously now. You don't need big budgets and marketing algorithms to make a good game. With a little hard work and friendship, anything is possible. Indie games were inside us the whole time.

 
 
 

So we still mad about Blizzard's relationship with China or nah?

 
 
 

This is my Fall Guy avatar bean thing. My friend says they are Orange, when they are clearly Yellow. Duh. If you see Orange, you are wrong.


 
 
 

All fps titles must now utilize grappling hooks.

 
 
 

Glad Far Cry 6 is exploring an alternate reality where Los Pollos Hermanos has gone too far.

 
 
 

My toilet seat does that thing where it slips when you sit on it. It's like missing a step in the dark but for your ass.

 
 
 

Tesla drivers are the new Prius drivers.

 
 


About Boxed Swineone of us since 2:59 PM on 12.11.2012

Three things you need to know about me:

1. I'm down for whatever
2. I'm not always down for whatever
3. Third thing
 
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