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So like many of you Dtoiders out there in internet land, I downloaded the Too Human demo. I know it's been out a while, but I've been too busy with Soul Calibur 4 to actually care. Well, last night I got bored and decided to give it a spin.

Before I get into detail, let me just get this right out of the way: This game sucks.

Perhaps the full game will turn out different, but as demos go, this is one of the worst. While I applaud the decision to give us such a lengthy demo (over an hour), I do not applaud the decision to use such boring game mechanics. Seriously, what kind of game doesn't let me move when I attack with a fucking sword? Sure, you can "slide" over to enemies, but for all intents and purposes you are stuck in place when using melee attacks.

That just doesn't jive with me. Now, I understand it's not supposed to be a straight up action game, but it certainly feels like that's what they're going for with this. And in that case, it fails miserably. It just wasn't fun at all. The game play isn't engaging, and I felt no urge to continue playing after only 5 minutes. You don't get any satisfaction from killing enemies, regardless of all the "loot" they drop. It just feels generic and half-assed. Same goes for the gun play, IMHO.

And the camera is fucking broken. It works like it's supposed to, but the way it's supposed to work, well, it just doesn't work. All I kept doing was hitting the right analog stick to change the camera, but as we all know, that is how you attack. It just felt absolutely ass backwards in it's implementation.

And let's not get started on the texture pop-in, which was noticeable right off the bat when I was selecting my character. Or the god-awful generic art style. Really, it sounds great on paper, but when you see it, it looks like absolute shit. It's boring, dull, whatever. It just plain sucks. 10 years in the making, and this is what they're delivering? I'm hoping they'll clean that shit up before the game's official release, but who knows? Either way, I can say with certainty I will definitely not be buying this game.

And considering I have wanted to play this for 10 years, that's a damn shame.

Fuck Too Human.


Also, are they kidding? Do they think it was a good idea to release that fucking demo? It's like the worst marketing you could ever have for a game. It just plain sucks.
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About EternalDeathSlayerone of us since 7:43 AM on 11.27.2007

Hello there Destructoid. I don't game as much as I used to when I was an extremely active member of the website. I've had a 3rd kid as opposed to the 2 I had back when I joined and I've discovered that there are other things to do besides play video games. But I'm still a gamer for life.

Wii U


Xbox 360




PS Vita

Decent PC for gaming


My Favorite Games:

I used to have a list here but honestly I've changed my mind quite a bit over the years. I played Chrono Trigger again like I do ever year or 2 and decided that it's dialogue, like many old (and many new) JRPGs, was just too shitty and juvenile for me to actually take seriously anymore. I guess I'm just getting old.

My favorite games in no particular order are Resident Evil 4, God of War, Super Mario Bros 3, Super Mario Galaxy, Legend of Zelda A Link to the Past,Final Fantasy Tactics, Batman Arkham Asylum, and Chrono Cross. Pretty sure I've forgotten a few games I might remember when asked what my favorite games are in the future. It changes a lot.

This website used to be the best on the internet. Hopefully it will get back to that point, or close, some day soon. I'll probably never fully leave anyway.

Xbox LIVE:Kobewan0869


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