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LONG BLOG

The Start of the Affair: Super Mario Bros.

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I'm taking it back bitches because it's mine more than any of you young kids can lay claim to.

Super Mario Brothers.

1985, the NES comes out, I see it featured in Boys Life as the hot new thing.

I see R.O.B., I see a gun, I see paradise.

I begged and pleaded with my parents to get me one.

"PAH! you have Superman and ET on your Atari 2600!"

"This is different! It has a robot!" <--- early tip off that I'd wind up here, I'm sure.

Well, Xmas came and went that year, little known to me that while my dad was on a business trip in NYC he managed to score one of the few NES Deluxe Sets available at the time. Along with a copy of Super Mario Bros.

Shortly after discovering what a miraculous turd Gyromite is (yet I still have my original R.O.B. as seen...)



After discovering how little I cared for Gyromite, Super Mario Brothers got to take it's turn on the field. Ducks are swell and all, but the mocking of that dog drove me mad.


Go to hell, seriously.

I put in Super Mario Brothers and from there started off a life long love of platforming and Mario.

Fuck Sonic.
Fuck Blast Processing.
Fuck Spyro, Blinx, The damn cat with the ! on his shirt, fuck everything else. Mario.

I played the original Super Mario Brothers for what must have been a good month solid before even realizing that I still owned those other two games. Such bliss. Such fun.

As an 8 year old, it's hard to wrap your head around why the Princess ain't in the castle and why there's a short fat dude who dresses badly in her place, but whatever, take me to the next level.

I amazed myself at how intuitive it all seemed. I found the warp zones well before there was a Nintendo Players Guide to help me get there.

I beat 8-4 with simple trial and error, not with Brady Games in tow, telling me how to play a game.


Did you know that images of things that are comforting and familiar triggers endorphins in your brain that are the same as those released after an orgasm? It's true, watch.



Ahh.... Yeah...

My point being that I have a very strong emotional attachment to this game. How strong? Well...

I've beaten this game well over 100 times, many times on multiple playthroughs in one sitting.

I've bought this game on 6 different consoles. NES, GameBoy Color, SNES (all stars), GBA, Wii, and finally an original Famicom copy.


Never gonna give you up, never gonna let you down...

I sold my original NES to my cousin to get a SNES, and the one game I regret selling out of all of them, was Super Mario Brothers. More than Dragon Warrior, more than Bionic Commando. More than my NES Advantage. I missed my Mario.

Now that I'm all grown up some 22 years later, the only thing I can think of that's a more relaxing time is to kick back, put on the Famputer, and fire up Super Mario Brothers (as it's called in Japan.) It's a great game, and it always will be.

More important than playing Super Mario, is for me to thank Shigeru Miyamoto for creating a game based off of a mortal enemy of a giant monkey and somehow making something as absurd as Super Mario Brothers must've been on paper and making it work.
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About BluDesignone of us since 11:49 AM on 11.10.2006



I own a FamPuter, which is a 100% fake Famicom. And I do own Super Mario Bros. and Rockman 2 for it, which you don't. :P



I'm a 34 year old gamer. I cannot hang out with most of you, and you should not contact me to buy you cheap wine or cigarettes. I do not like jail. Seriously, I own all three consoles and I don't discriminate. Gaming is for fun, not for sissy slapfights. If you consider yourself partial to a particular console, I don't care why you don't own other consoles, I don't want to hear about it. If you're going to bitch about something, you'd better bring some hard evidence of why you're complaining if you want to cry on my shoulder.

Enjoy this wonderful picture of 2 generations coming together at last...



PS - I eat trolls.

PPS - I've been to Japan. Maybe you've heard about it? If not, read up here:

Part 1: Introductions
Part 2: Yamagata's Hanagasa Festival
Part 3: Harajuku Girls and the lack thereof
Part 4: You're not in Kansas anymore, Niero (TGS07)
Part 5: Fresh from the farm to your mouth
Part 6: Going to Japan is hard
Part 7: 30 days takes forever
Part 8: Rape, Rocks, and Alliteration
Part 9: Small Town Nightlife
Part 10: Bling Bling, Hundred Thousand Yen Bill Ya'll
Part 10 Part 2: Mount Yamadera
Part 11: The Japanese Wal-Mart
Part 12: Goin' Down to Tokyo Town
Part 13: Ghiblit Gravy
Part 14: Air Sex
Part 15: Ganguros of New Tokyo
Part 16: The Contest Announcement
Part 17: The Contest
Part 18: The Trip Itinerary
Part 19: Tokyo Day 2
Part 20: Tokyo Day 2 Part 2 (of 2)
Part 21 is no longer there, but it wasn't all that great anyway, so you're not missing out.
Part 22: Happy Picture Montage Time!
Part 23: I have arrived.
Part 24: I have returned.
Part 25: The Case for the American Cheeseburger
Part 26: Random pictures are random
Part 27: A Free Gift for Those Who've Been Paying Attention
Part 28: Nintendo, no seriously, NINTENDO
Part 29: Racists in Japan, Discriminating against the handicapped
Special Report from Cheapy D at CAG
Part 30: The Secret Truth About Japan
Part 31: Oz-Matsuri
Part 32: The Japanese Don't Have Antiperspirant Deodorant

Part 33: There's this Disney character named Stitch in Japan...
Part 34: Trainspotting: Live From Kyoto
Part 35: Kyoto for Beginners
Part 36: Kyoto Smash: Advance Lesson in Fun Time
Part 37: Some Japanese people are alcoholics
Part 38: Hardcore Otaku know where the real action is
Part 40: My attempt at getting the Oscar for Best Japanese Picture
Part 41: What heaven is like.
Part 42: I sneak into a movie studio to pitch my movie
Part 41: What heaven is like.
Part 43: My film idea is shot down in favor of yet another Power Rangers TV show
Part 44: Excessive Male Nudity in Japan
Part 45: The Japanese grocery store has no deli counter
Part 46: How the Japanese language is worked into Japan's society
Part 47: Izukayas and you: How the Japanese drink in public
Part 48: All you really need to know about the Tokyo Auto Show
Part 49: Gyudon Rocks.
Part 50: Tendo is the coolest place in all of Japan
Part 51: I really did poop immediately after that shot
Part 52: A Beginner's Guide to Tokyo Disney Sea
Part 53: There is no comparison. Cheeseburgers win.
Part 55: You've never had Tonkatsu, so you wouldn't understand
Part 56: Japanese iTunes for the Mac addict
Part 57: The other kind of Curry
Part 58: Popular Pop and "Lock" music in Japan
Part 59: I sing like how cats have sex
Part 60: The Iron Penis Festival
Part 61: A sad bit about racism in Japan
Part 9001: Electro Lemon's whirlwind visit to Tokyo
Xbox LIVE:metalocalypse
PSN ID:BluDesign
Mii code:5154504518393743


 

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