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LONG BLOG

13 Reasons Why GamesRadar is Retarded.

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Ok, I am getting sick of GamesRadar. I mean, they have some good stuff from time to time, but they always get these stupid "Top (instert radnom number here)" lists and they all completely suck dick. And I have finally had it with their new "13 Worst Gaming Innovations of all Time" article by Shane Patterson. It really is one of the dumbest pieces of "gaming journalism" I have read in my entire life.

Alright, I am going to put this little blurb here. When I first started writing this blog I was thinking on posting my counter argument to each one of the "innovations" that Games Radar believes is bad. But, then I decided that half of them weren't even innovations as much as they are a feature. Also, this would have been a quite lengthy post so I decided that I should shorten it a bit. So now I have chosen just a couple of these so called terrible innovations that I most disagree with and write about them.



PERIPHERALS

Oh yes, peripherals are one of the worst innovations ever. You have to be kidding me. Do the people at GamesRadar have no fucking clue what they are talking about? They say that having gaming peripherals makes you look not cool. I have a message for you GamesRadar:

FUCK YOU.

If your biggest concern is to look cool while playing games, they you need to go to hell. I am dead serious here, go straight to fucking hell. Some of the best video game experiences are only possible with the use of peripherals; Guitar Hero and Rock Band come to mind. Seriously think about it, where would gaming be without the Power Glove or the Power Pad? How would you be able to play Duck Hunt without the Zapper. And just to add, I have not met a single person that think Guitar Hero is gay after being made to play it except for Ron Workman.



LENSE FLARE

Lense flare? Are you kidding me? You are seriously going to complain about lens flares being a terrible innovation? Shut the fuck up.



QUICK TIME EVENTS

Quick Time Events are fucking awesome. Patterson cites games such as Heavenly Sword and Spiderman 3 as to why QTEs suck. That is just unfair. Citing two bad games as two why a certain feature sucks is like saying 3rd person shooters suck because Kane & Lynch and Army of Two both suck. Why doesn't he mention a god like God of War? He uses GoW for his image, that game is a great example of QTEs done right. I don't know about you, but it is quite satisfying to jump up on a cyclops and stab it in the eyeball to death when I do the button chain correctly.

I just think it is unfair to say a certain game play mechanic or feature is bad just because a game that sucks has it, it is just stupid and completely flawed logic.



3D GAMES

Ok, this is the big one. This might be the dumbest fucking thing I have ever heard. It really takes the cake. How the fuck can somebody seriously say that 3D games were a bad innovation? I'm really not sure where to start or what to say exactly. Do I really need to say anything? Honestly, I could write a 12 page paper on how the jump to 3D has propelled video games into a completely new form of entertainment beyond anything that we could have imagined when the only thing we had was the Atari 2600.

What do you guys think. Am I crazy? Is this whole article a joke that I just didn't get? Please tell me that I'm not crazy.

*note*
I know I didn't list 13 reasons in this article. I don't care.
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About Namelesstedone of us since 1:53 AM on 11.06.2006

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