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"There Will Be Boring Blood" is quite boring.

What a bunch of faggots that watch movies these days. I've seen so many movies in my life, but there hasn't been one that I needed to take a break and have a smoke (I don't even smoke) because a movie is so agonizing and flat out boring. The film? There Will Be Blood, P.T. Anderson's work of trash. It's a 3 hour long movie that leads to nothing of any importance. It's like going to church for 3 hours for the preacher to tell you right at the end "Yeah, there's greed and corruption in everything.". I got the movie. I understood it. I just thought it was very, very boring. I mean, a movie with it's key line being "I'll drink your milkshake!" has disaster written all over it, right?

Wrong. According to many internet fat boys and movie critics, this film is considered a masterpiece. 2 Oscars. 2 Oscars for 3 hours of pathetic footage of desert land and 2 actors dueling it out for the love of the people (the rest of the actors sucked). My goodness, I went to see Rambo this year too, and I flat out thought that rehashed movie was a ton better than watching this crappy film. Let me ruin the film for ya so you won't have to suffer through this garbage:

1) Plainview finds oil (doesn't have any dialog in the movie for 15 minutes too!)
2) He gets a crew and adopts a son from a dead miner.
3) He uses the new son for an "aww" tool for the general public (bunch of suckers).
4) Digs more oil.
5) Abel (a crazy preacher kid) shows up and tells Plainview about oil in California.
6) Plainview does his bit there.
7) Disaster happens in a few scenes during oil digging in Cali. His son if deaf.
8) A stranger shows up saying to be Plainview's brother. The son knows better.
9) Plainview sends his son away after his son catches their dumpy house on fire.
10) Plainview finds out the truth and shoots his "brother".
11) Abel slaps Plainview around at church and lures him into accepting the Lord.
12) I started falling asleep.
13) In the end, Plainview tells his son he was adopted and he wants nothing to do with him, Abel shows up asking for money for his mission and denounces Christ for the cash, Plainview kills Abel (lol, kinda like how Abel killed Cain in the Bible).

I guess because the movie was drawn out (again, 3 hours long for that), it deserves attention. But that's only if you're a faggot and watch those indie films like they're something special.

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About DryvByone of us since 2:29 PM on 02.24.2007

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