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LONG BLOG

Trees Murder People Every Day

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Lumberjacks save lives. Trees are everywhere. In our backyards, in our front yards, even in our forests. Trees like to fall down and cave in houses, killing entire families. If a tree had the chance, it would murder you and everyone you care about.

I used to say "I chop down trees because I DONT GIVE A FUCK!". Well, now whenever I chop down a tree or just burn it, I know I make a difference and possibly save a life or even a whole family.

When you hug a tree, just know, that tree isn't hugging you back. Its plotting revenge because your house is made out of its family.

So the next time you see a Lumberjack, say thanks. But don't look him directly in the eyes or he will jack you. After all, without lumberjacks we wouldn't have lumber. Without lumber we wouldn't have lincoln logs, houses, pencils, sticks for beating children and fire. Marshmallows would be completely useless. Ever eat a marshmallow just out of the bag? Me neither.

Carry that axe with you. You look that tree right square in the eyes, and you say take your best shot pal, I can take it.
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About savagesaladinone of us since 11:38 AM on 01.07.2007

Who the fuck cares?
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