LONG BLOG
Nothing good lasts forever, so let's make what comes next even better
Let’s cut to the chase. I’ve decided it’s time I resign from contributing to Destructoid as a staff member. I love the community, I love the staff, and I love what I’ve been writing for the site, but this is a decision I should make sooner rather than later. This must come off as a very sudden decision considering everything I was saying to hype up my return to form earlier. I want to explain why.
I took my sabbatical from writing for Destructoid at the start of August because I’ve been feeling burned out on writing for the site. I constantly longed to work on other ideas, I felt little passion for continuing to write video game articles, and I had a lot less free time than I did when I first started writing for the site (I say as if I thought that last point would change by the end of my break). At the time I thought the first two points were mostly a side effect of the last point, but when I was briefly hired at a full-time job located farther from home than my current full-time job, I didn’t have this problem. After reflecting on this, I’ve come to a conclusion.
I don’t think my main reasons for wanting to write for Destructoid apply to me anymore, and the passage of time or taking a break isn’t going to change that. I believe it’s time I move on.
Firstly, as I’ve admitted on a handful of occasions, I started writing as a community blogger -- and respectively, aspired to become a staff member writing for the front page -- because I was struggling to motivate myself to pursue a career. As in, any career. Writing for Destructoid gave me a push that I needed badly at that point in my life. Now that I have a full-time job as a programmer (and it’s gone very well for these first four months), being a contributor here doesn’t really do anything for that need.
As far as why that goal motivated me, I had a dream of being a video game critic. A lot of things have changed since then, and after reflecting on all of those things together, I honestly can’t say I want to continue this as much as I want to chase passions that are less critical and more creative. Even many of my original reasons for wanting to be a critic, in retrospect, better apply to making more creative content. I can’t continue to put the same passion into my articles as much as I used to, not in the long run. I’m still very happy with my most recent pieces -- much happier than I am with my earlier ones, even! But I would much rather divert my future time towards growing in efforts I can pursue wholeheartedly.
I apologize for changing my mind after I said I had every intention of continuing to write for the site. That said, I’m proud of the sum of my work as a contributor, and I’m thankful to have been able to do this for a year and a half. Even though I’ve written some pieces I remain a little embarrassed to have made, I’ve used my reflections from them to grow a lot as a person, a critical thinker, and a writer. And many of my best pieces have given me the chance to live out the content creator experience that I’ve held up as an ideal and a dream for so long -- to entertain, to inform, and to generate constructive discussion. It’s not an overstatement to say I’m thankful to every one of you.
And I’m not planning to be a stranger! Like a couple of weeks ago, I have every intention to share new projects in the community blogs! I’m still working on sorting out my priorities, but I guarantee you’ll see more of my insect-power-fantasy-themed shenanigans. And I’m going to do my best to keep in touch with everyone in Communicord. Except for vxxy.
Actually, that was a lie. Vxxy’s a great friend. As are all of you reading this. Thank you, and I hope all of your days are even better than mine! And I ain’t going easy on my good-day having!
- Thanks for reading, and don't implode!
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About Chris Hovermaleone of us since 8:03 PM on 07.31.2017
I first joined the site wanting to make a name for myself as a blogger, and somehow, did so enough to get a good run as a staff member. I left the team so I could better focus on new goals in life, but I hang around the community because I've made so many great friends here. Expect me to share some less critical and more creative shenanigans in the blogs from time to time...!
As far as social media is concerned, you can find me on my personal Twitter account! Fair advice, you can expect to see a lot more of the big blue character in my banner if you check that out. Whether that's a recommendation or a warning depends. By the way, that banner is a commission by Twitter user @kaizer33226.