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Touching is good, leaving fingerprints is evil

People have some strange compulsions. Counting steps, hair-twirling, sacrificing kittens to the full moon god -- we all have quirks, you know?

Mine is keeping my electronic devices clean. I thought about electrifying my monitor to deliver a mild jolt to coworkers who feel the need to touch it when showing me something. So the new glossy electronics trend has been less than ideal.

And then Nintendo DS had to go and screw things up. Previously, people using portable touchscreen devices were PDA-brandishing, stylus-wielding professionals. Fair enough. But now, Nintendo started encouraging people to touch the screen with their greasy McDonald's wifi-using fingers. And then they had to go and make an assload of money doing it, with an all-ages portable entertainment device. Sure, there's a stylus. But unlike with PDAs, you could often go all thumbs and still be effective.

Now this insidious touchscreen control blasphemy has spilled over to portable media players from Apple, Samsung, Cowon, and others. I can't help but assign the DS some blame. Not only can my shiny devices be covered in fingerprints, I can enjoy the great viewing experience of looking through a blurry head-stained subway car window. Either that, or carry a polishing cloth around, ready to deploy it like the OCD lovechild of Felix Ungar and Monk.

This I say, future interactive entertainment manufacturers: Keep your degenerate, filthy fingers off my screen.
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About MaxVestone of us since 9:23 PM on 06.03.2007

It's only a model...

Uncommon, some wear on the edges.

First game: TI Invaders (Space Invaders knock-off) for the TI-99 "home computer". Either that or the Pac-Man built into the glass-top tables at Mr. Gatti's Pizza.
First console: NES
First world-altering game secret: JUSTIN BAILEY
First Arcade: Aladdin's Palace
First "mature" game: Leisure Suit Larry
First PC: 386SX 16 mHz w/40 MB HDD, Win 3.0, & 640x480 VGA baby!
First FPS: Wolfenstein 3D
First game mastered: Street Fighter II Turbo - Hyper Fighting (SNES)
First LAN deathmatch: Duke Nukem 3D
Great Game Reawakening: Living in an apartment with all sixth generation consoles and 3 gaming rigs.

New Systems: Wii, DS.
Somehow now owns: PS3
Randomly owns: SEGA Nomad, Game Gear, Genesis II, Sega CD
Cannot afford but is thinking about intercepting return RROD coffin: Xbox 360.
Currently playing: Rock Band, Zack & Wiki, Unreal Tournament III