Destructoid, you've been very naughty. How dare you. You offend me.
JUST KIDDING!!! Haha. I like irreverent jokes designed for laughter. It is funny.
Here is more funny: Eminem. The humanist rapper has released a new group of 1s and 0s that, when converted to an mp3 format, contain musics. That. Is. HILARIOUS!!!!!!!!
Think about it for a minute. If he were smart, he would travel the nation knocking on doors and singing his lovely songs without the help of a computer. Instead, the unOrwellian idiot has released CDs, vinyl records, MP3s, and gramophones containing music. So, when you buy it you don't even get to talk to him and strap him to a chair in order to feed.
Fuck you, Eminem. I'm so god damned hungry.
Here's my review of the Slim Shady LP.
Putting aside the fact that I am unable to consume the flesh of the world's most famous white rapper, this album is almost like having the human in one's vicinity. You can hear his voice as he talks about Kurt Cobain, shish kabob, Lauren Hill, sore throats, wardrobes, orange robes, autographs, being absent-minded, doctors, herpes, Christmas, suicide, middle fingers, sell-out crowds, record release parties, gourds, hammers, Fords, sandwiches, picnic baskets, Excedrin, medicine cabinets, lettuce, cabbage, mummies, bitches, Detroit, the Beastie Boys, Kid Rock, the Loch Ness Monster, weed houses, lipstick, dipsticks, prank calls, rich rappers, and your mom. It is truly impressive.
Remember The Devastation and Destruction of Destructoid? There's now a sexy pdf: http://zombieorwell.files.wordpress.com/2014/04/devdesdtoid.pdf
More sexy news: my transcriptionist, Brandon Springer, has produced the first episode of his magisterial Kilonova Complex. It's sci fi. It's short. It's a buck. It's here: http://www.amazon.com/Kilonova-Complex-Episode-Brandon-Springer-ebook/dp/B00J6N7RDU/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1396399817&sr=1-1
Tell your friends, tell your neighbors, tell Randy Gonzalez. I'm coming.
LOOK WHO CAME: