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Randombullseye on Mass Effect 3ís ending

I tried not to spoil stuff, and just allude to things, but fuck it. If you really want to play the game, play it. Iím considering giving my 360 copy away, so ask nicely, maybe Iíll let you have it.

As I write all this, Iím watching David Lynchís ending to Twin Peaks.I'm trying to take that ending to my thirty hour commitment in, while contemplating a hundred hour commitment from a video game. Sometimes, I wish the ending I saw for Army of Darkness wasnít the awesome one where he gets the girl and fights the demon in a shopping mall, but the one where he goes to an apocalyptic future, that the rest of the world got to see instead. Alternate endings and endings matter, if an ending retcons another ending, ok. Iím in, if it is a hilarious retcon, like the dog peeing on Freddy Krueger or when Jason was dug up and had lighting strike him, or even better, Frankesntein falling into a convient basement cave in the windmill and surviving. I love shit like that, comic books are bred on that type of bullshit, and Iím curious to see if the rumored Truth DLC is actually real or not. I have high hopes for what Mass Effect 4, I know they will release something eventually, this is Electronic Arts. Their too stupid to let a franchise lay dormant, unless that franchise is the gold box games, specifically Buck Rodgers on Genesis, which Mass Effect directly pulls ideas from several times. I loved that game for the same reason I love Mass Effect, it was me making my team of dudes and carving my own path through the universe, ultimately trying to save the day.

That is what is is all about right? I was to save the day. I'm the hero, or anti hero, and I'm going to save the day. The choices I was presented with let me do that. Knowing how life goes, I don't know what to tell people that can't take a bummer ending. The problems is logic, I have a problem with, but they happened. Done deal, so who cares. I always like to compare our lives to stories, that people who died that I know, their story ends, and mine keeps going. Endings are important. I knew the ending to The Bonerquest, early on. The best way to write, is to write backwards knowing where things are going and what your ending is then tying everything to that moment. Victory, pain, and redemption are all important ideas for an ending to have, as a tragedy or comedy, every story needs elements of both in their ending. I found the final epilogue after the credits on Mass Effect 3, hilarious. The old man calls the kid "my sweet," and Sheppered is reffered to as "the sheppered," so now you're Jesus? I love it. Things got as dumb as they possibly could, and I love that.

I really thought it would be me either saving the day or destroying everything, but the shades of gray in all three endings blurs that line. I think I saved the day with my ending, and that the other two were not even options to consider. But that's just my opinion.

My final verdict? I liked Mass Effect 3. If I had to review it, I'd cite the known import glitch, the galactic readiness being vague, the reaper chases, and strange graphical and sound glitches being rampant. There are no excuses for these things, they exist. Might lack replay value and their are hard to ignore faults. 7/10

My final thought about the series? I liked it.

I wish it had just been one, long full game with no ďoptionalĒ downloadable content, like Persona 3.

Thatís it.
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About randombullseyeone of us since 5:44 PM on 07.05.2008

"I am hoping that I can be known as a great writer and actor some day, rather than a sex symbol." - Words of wisdom from the deity Steven Seagal

"Existence is random. Has no pattern save what we imagine after staring at it too long. No meaning save what we choose to impose." - Alan Moore from Watchmen

My own writing reflects the opinion of every corporation, company, individual, monsters, and gods. Also, cocks!

Coming soon as an actual book you can buy The Bonerquest. Hopefully you'll buy a copy when I'm done with it.

Will you accept The Bonerquest?

Zombies Ate My Neighbors is the best game ever.

Read fun articles Josh (Charlie) wrote for Tomopop or Nukezilla! Professionalism! Also I did some news for Destructoid. Sort of a real writer!

Check out Josh Hayes, a name Charlie uses for journalism on the internet so that he can say silly personal things without the fear of them being exposed openly. That and to hide from people he knew who he don't want to find him, not no way, not no how.

Twitter, or Tumblr!

Old School Games articles are pretty much worth reading. They say write what you know.

X-Com UFO Defense

Zelda 2

X-Men Mutant Apocalypse

Dragon Warrior III

Castlevania III: Dracula's Curse

Final Fantasy 3 (Final Fantasy VI)

Way of the Samurai

Nick Arcade

We Love Katamari

Ninja Gaiden

Toejam & Earl

River City Ransom

Mega Man X

Pokemon Red/Blue

Yakuza series

Operation Darkness


X-Men 2: Clone Wars

Sweet Home

Legend of Dragoon

Clock Tower

Mystal Ninja/Ganabre Goemon series

Onimusha Warlords

Rockin' Kats


Spawn games

God Hand

Blood Will Tell

Super Godzilla


Animal Platformers

Robot Alchemic Drive (R.A.D.)

Buck Rodgers Countdown to Doomsday

Darkwing Duck

Shin Megami Tensei games (Persona, Devil Summoner, Devil Survivor)

Jurassic Park 2

Disgaea & other Nippon Ichi Games (Phantom Brave, Makai Kingdom, La Pucelle Tactics, Soul Nomad)

Twisted Tales of Spike Mcfang

Resident Evil

Legend of Kage

Lost Vikings

Devil May Cry

Comix Zone

X- Men

Threads of Fate

Mutant League Football

Mega Man 7

Castlevania 2

Sonic 2

Dragon Warrior 2

Donkey Kong Country

Spider-man & X-Men Arcades revenge




Splatterhouse 2

Elevator Action

Mega Man 6

Mega Man 5

Dig Dug

Mega Man 4

Mega Man 3

Mega Man 2

Rock Roll Racing


Mega Man

Beat Em Ups PART 6: Future

Beat Em Ups PART 5: Playstation 2/Xbox/Gamecube

Beat Em Ups PART 4: Playstation/Saturn

Beat Em Ups PART 3: Sega Genesis Super Nintendo

Beat Em Ups PART 2: Nintendo

Beat Em Ups PART 1: Arcade

Smash TV

Ghosts & Goblins


Werewolf Last Warrior


Dragon Warrior


Rolling Thunder

Splatterhouse 3

Doom Troopers

Demons Crest

Primal Rage

Zero Wing


G. I. Joe


Listen to Josh "randombullseye" Hayes on Destructoid's #1 bullshit podcast, Bulltoid! There were nearly fifty episodes in total, good luck.
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