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LONG BLOG

Congratulations, ME3 outragists, on finally getting what you deserve

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But Mousie, thou art no thy lane,
In proving foresight may be vain:
The best-laid schemes o' mice an' men
Gang aft agley,
An' lea'e us nought but grief an' pain,
For promis'd joy!
- Robert Burns, To a Mouse, on Turning Her Up in Her Nest with the Plough (1785)

I thought I'd said my peace regarding the whole Mass Effect 3 ending issue in my prior two posts on the topic, but with the recent, ridiculous Federal Trade Commission complaint... I noticed something. There's a pattern to this behavior. A pattern I don't like, and, to be honest, that frightens me a bit. If you caught this post in the first few minutes of it going up, you may have noticed a little snipe at the end, expressing my sympathy to any woman who had to deal with the attentions of these crybabies, which I deleted because it felt off-topic and a bit too much of a stretch. No more.

Those of you petitioning for an entirely new ending to ME3, complaining to the FTC, drumming up support for this kind of crap through the dispicable Retake Mass Effect campaign... you're basically the "white knights," third wheels, and penises-in-a-glass-case to your unrequited love, the Mass Effect franchise. You're collectively tantamount to the sort of sleeper-cell date-rapists that invest who knows how many hours trying to score "points" with a female acquaintance, only to be supremely outraged and indignant when all that effort is seemingly for naught when she chooses another man over you, and it makes me sick to my stomach.



But you've made your bed now, ME3 whinemob, and I hope you get what's coming to you as you and BioWare's writers lie in it, for some brief, fleeting, half-hearted, and unsatisfactory moment. Truly, you have come together to get what's coming to you. And BioWare, well, one can only hope people are quick to forget your subsequent walk of shame.
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About nekobunone of us since 5:17 PM on 06.29.2007

Hi, I'm Chris, though I've been going by nekobun and variants thereof for so long, I kind of answer to both anymore.

While I've kind of got my own thing going in the realm of indie coverage, at least in the form of playing through (and streaming) (and writing about) the huge backlog I'm developing of games gleaned from various indie bundles, I try to keep my more mainstream, game-related features here, as well as opinion pieces on the industry at large, out of mad love for the 'toid. When I'm not rambling here or trying to be clever in comments threads, you can catch me rambling on Facebook and my Twitter, and trying to be clever in the Dtoid.tv chat.

Now Playing:
360: Halo 4
PC: F.E.A.R.
SNES: Secret Of Mana

Promoted:
I suck at games: PEW PEW LASERS
Improving game communities: Collective consciousness
Nothing is sacred: These walls have torn my world apart
The wrong thing: Only cream and bastards catch them all.
Love/Hate: I love to hate -you-
Love/Hate: B(u)y the book
The Future: Is still what it used to be
My Expertise: Playing the race kart
Something about sex: Sex sells, but who's buying?
E3 Approaches: It's oh so quiet
Freedom: Together, we'll break the chains of HUDs
East vs West: We've got the empire
Handhelds: Graduating as 2000's Catchemaledictorian
Relaxation: Cheesy double Chief burrito
Online Passes: A spoonful of sugar
Peripherals: Many tentacles pimpin' on the keys
This is what MAGfest is all about
Beginnings: Put it on the pizza
Disappointment: Bad(vent) timing

Recap Topsauce:
It's Thinking: Could you quit playing with that radio, love?
Do the wrong thing: And do it right, for once.
Afraid to shoot strangers.
Not if you were the last junkie on Pandora
Is Jim Sterling servicing the video games industry?
Something About Sex: Unsafe at any speed.
Doing DLC right
Congress passes sweeping Elfcare reform bill
Bottom five healthcare systems in videogames.
Pushing my love over the quarter line.
When my life would depend on an eight point none.
Remember the heroes.
Every Journey begins with a single step.
It's all over now, bomber blue.
Being Social: We'll always have Rainbow Road
Labor Day: Of course you realize, this means wark.
Please, aim it higher.
There Would've Been Brawl: Show me 'round your eggplantcage.
Integration: A place for everything
Zelda Week: I guess this is growing up.
MAGfest: the (don't be an) idiot's guide
Promotions: The bees are alright
Now is the winter of on-disc content
This was supposed to be a dozen items about nekobun.
Without Slenderness, there's something missing.
Cheap tricks (and treats) don't come cheaper than free.
The legacy of the (unlikely) wizard.
Cheap Tricks II: Sugar rush boogaloo
Thank you, for bringing me here, for showing me Home.
Burnt flowers fallen: the tragic bitchotry of Lilly Caul
Red and blue, resolving into purple.
Xbox LIVE:nekobun
PSN ID:strictmachine
Steam ID:nekobun
Mii code:2610 8366 7890 1412


 

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