falsenipple blog header photo
falsenipple's c-blog
Posts 0Blogs 13Following 0Followers 21



Let me show you what I've done with some crayons


Click here to see the above at its full resolution

Too much coffee. Too much coffee. Too much coffee.

Painting used to be one of my hobbies, and I say used to because I can't do it where I currently live. Its really messy, or at least when I do it right. Most things are messy when you do them right, and I can't currently afford to be right. So I've been messing around in Photoshop lately, and it's been a lot of fun. It's not quite as fun as actually painting, but it is a hell of a lot easier to clean up after, and, beyond time invested, it costs nothing.

Part of me is dying to buy a Wacom drawing tablet, so I can do some serious digital art, but I know that not only isn't my budget, but that I'm a fickle, little shit that will promptly give up on art as soon as I get bored.

Did I mention that it has been almost five years since I last painted?

I was a heavy smoker then and also a vegan. I had to have been thirty pounds lighter and seven times more fidgety. It was a lively time, but it definitely took its toll on me. The smoking I miss more than the vegan diet, although the diet did inspire me to learn how to cook, which I now do well and on a daily basis.

Ok, enough of that. I should probably address what you're looking at above and possibly in the other attached images below.

That is what happens when I make something video game related as an excuse to post a blog and share all of the other random headers that I have made for fellow community members over the past couple of days. It's a desktop wallpaper, or whatever other thing you want to call a picture set to those proportions, that showcases Jade from Ubisoft's Beyond Good & Evil. I wanted to emphasize the title and work with the idea of duplicity between light and dark contrasts, color inversion, and, forgive me for all the things that are wrong with it, grittier imagery.

While time does indeed fly when you're having fun, I did take notice that it only took my five hours to make that image, whereas when I was painting it took me weeks to finish a painting that had an eighth of the detail. Technology is a wonderful and effort trivializing thing.

Below there are a handful of blog header images that I forced on other users via PM this week. Most of them were flattered and took them in good sport, but I honestly felt like I was imposing, even though it was just a gift. Maybe one day I'll figure out why something like that makes me feel guilty.

Have a peek and tell me what you think. Any tips in regard to photoshop, visual composition, or art in general will be highly appreciated.

For Debatoid

For Wolfy

For Caiters

For Man With No Name

For Mr. Andy 'Boner' Dixon

For Occam's Electric Toothbrush, which I enjoyed making so much I kept part of the header image to make another wallpaper.

For Venus In Furs

For Handy

For anyone who wants it

For funktastic
Login to vote this up!


Knivy   1
WolfyBoey   1
Ben Davis   1
Scissors   1
JJJEnigma   1
Caitlin Cooke   1
rthse   1
VenusInFurs   1
Bibbly   1
Gaming in Public   1
Gnarlythotep   1
ManWithNoName   1
knutaf   1
LawofThermalDynamics   1
Alasdair Duncan   1
SuperMonk4Ever   1
Occams   1
M Randy   1
Beyamor   1
Sean Daisy   1
jqm78   1
Hohojirozame   1
Handy   1
Nihil   1
Ross   1



Please login (or) make a quick account (free)
to view and post comments.

 Login with Twitter

 Login with Dtoid

Three day old threads are only visible to verified humans - this helps our small community management team stay on top of spam

Sorry for the extra step!


About falsenippleone of us since 7:51 PM on 04.15.2010

I can't think of a good reason why I blog here, and honestly I think its only because I lack the self-control not to. In the past I have wasted way too much time socializing online simply because I liked the anonymity and all the stupid trolling that entailed.

Of course, this is a different place, you're all respectable people, and I am an adult who has grown into his three inch penis and the inferiority complex that accompanies it.

Hi, my name is J/Jordan/falsenipple, but you can call me whatever you like, or summarily ignore me if that better suits your fancy. I'm nearing on being old enough to be dead, from Chicago, and have been gaming since I was 6, which was awhile ago.

I have yet to mature since then, nor have I become skilled enough to beat Megaman 2, although it hasn't stopped me from soundly losing until I have won every other game.

None of the previously mentioned things actually mean much to me though. Frankly, as any good troll is, I am more interested in other people, which is why I don't talk about myself too often. I've got a mouthful of feet and a throat full of Achilles' heels. So making this introduction is more than awkward for me.

Most of the time I just stalk people around until they assume that I'm their friend, or a friend of their friend, who unassumingly has been shadowing the lot of them and pocketing scraps of their hair to make dolls out of.

Forget that you read that last bit. Also forget that I've ended multiple sentences with propositions. The devil made me do it.

I guess I should keep at whatever it is I am doing here.



1. Are you a gamer?

No, but I've passed the Turing Test, so I can't rightfully be called a game anymore.

2. What?

Just go with it.

3. Seriously?


4. Are you going to continue asking yourself questions in the third person?

I didn't ask for schizophrenia, but I'll sure as shit not be sassed by my own psychosis. NEXT QUESTION PLEASE~!

5. What games are you currently playing or would like to play in the future?

Battlefield 3, Dark Souls, Magic: The Gathering, Bioshock Infinite, and a bunch of other garbage. It's a lot easier just to stalk people online through their gamertag and psn tag than actually answer something like this.

You could look at mine (GT:OMGhotdogs, PSN:jsapper), but I don't exactly like most people enough to to game with them, let alone accept friend requests. I'm kind of a misanthrope, and spend most of my time mumbling to myself and hiding in dark places within online shooters hoping to ambush someone and steal their wallet and possibly ask them how punctuation works. You know, so I can type up readable things instead of things like this.

6. Are you alright?


7. Stop staring at me.

That's not a question.

8. You're not making this any easier.

Funnel Cake?