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Top 6 Forms of Anti-piracy

(Usually, there'll be top 5 or top 10. It was going to be top 5, but there was no way I could leave one of my favorites out.)

Nowadays, you pirate a game, and install it/play it. And if it's a pirated copy, most likely you'll get a blue/black/green/white screen, or the game becomes horribly glitched up to where it is nearly unplayable. But back in the days of the NES/SNES/Genesis, anti-piracy was a bit more clever or forgiving, these being the top 6:

6: Micheal Jackson's Vuvuzela

Although relatively new, Micheal Jackson Vuvuzela is an instant classic that'll be remembered by it's great form of AP. The game is Micheal Jackson; The Experience. It's an Elite Beat Agent/Quendan clone in which buttons appear in time with music, and you have to tap the buttons when indicated. However, try to pirate it and the buttons dissapear along with the vuvuzela being played in the background. It sets you up to where you can't play the game or enjoy the music. You're screwed in all accounts.

5: Your silly copy can't play that many levels

Puggsy is an outstanding platformer for Sega Genesis and funny enough, one of the games I've grown up with. The platforming style just worked. However, on a hacked/pirated copy, you can only play the junior levels, and it'll tease you by making the boss even easier. And you know what, if you steal this game, you deserve to have this screen come up. Because you know what? Puggsy deserves your money. Even if the game is only worth about $0.10 now. And best part about it, they sound so sincere, which is weird when you see AP's like #1s.

4: Spyro, what are you doing?

You sit down, turn on your game. The game works fine. You go up to your fairy and she tells you you're running a hacked/illegal copy. The half-second feeling of horror and guilt just come to you instantly. And also, it's pretty funny how this AP does quite literally NOTHING. It's just a quick heads up. Hey, you're running a hacked copy. Cool. Just here to let you know.


Rockman Exe Shooting Star (I believe that's the title) is a megaman game in which you have somewhat real time battles in a unique way using the DS. However, if you want to pirate it, you'll go into EXTREME HARD MODE. The battles work in random encounters. But pirated, you'll have nothing but encounters. You'll take half a step, and be instantly placed in another battle. However, this was also done on Earthbound, famous for having roughly 9999999 forms of anti piracy.

2: Just my game freezing. No big deal. OH SHI-!

Earthbound, one of the more well-known games of the good ol' days. You've finally reached the final boss. You've done it. One last fight to go. He talks for a bit, then game freezes. WHAT THE- HOW COULD YOU?! Alright, goosefraba, goosefraba. I can just reset and load my save.

Wait, my save files are gone?

1: That Music!

That music.

The whole feeling of this screen is just heart stopping. “It's a serious crime”. OH GOD WHAT HAVE I DONE.

That music makes you feel like you're a horrible person who deserves to rot on the inside and outside.

And then, refer to your manual. You have a copied game. What manual could you possibly possess to go to super metroid?

Honorable Mention

As someone said in the comments...

Forever Drunk.
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~JnRx Teh Jokester~   1
wisearse   1



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About MathewRDone of us since 10:20 PM on 09.19.2010

I'm just here to play some games.