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The Curious Conundrum Of Online Douchery


I don't know what it is about the internet that makes people show their alpha-base nature.

I guess it has to do with the shell of anonymity that encapsulates us all when going online, a shield made of fake names and pictures that represent some sort of aspiration or side of your real self. It allows us to reveal our most honest nature unabashedly, without fear of repercussion or consequence because, well, who's going to be able to do anything about it? It's not like they know your real name, it's not like they know where you live right down to the mailbox and two lopsided trees in the front yard. Why would someone be afraid of something that can't touch them, and if that is the case, why would they not act like an incorrigible asshat, especially if it's more "fun" that way?

This principle, I've found, is no more prevalent and pervasive than in online services on videogame consoles. I seem to find some good folks every once in awhile, and they're not that few and far between in the grander scheme of things. However, just like bad experiences in a restaurant, the repulsives seem to stick in the mind far more than the decent examples of humanity online, whether it's on Live or PSN. It's not like everyone's a rampaging tan/laundry/douche fanatic with a thick northeastern accent talking about "how many sisters have you fucked, you dumb redneck," but experiences like that really ruin the flavor of the entire soup, you know? It's not like I don't talk smack online, but I do try to keep it somewhat civil - there's a not-too-fine-line that you can tread that straddles "saint" and "Satan." You can be a bit of a jerk and still have fun with it. But that line, just like all other lines, can be and most definitely will be crossed anywhere along the way. When that line is crossed, it's a sad look at how many of the population put that attitude out there into the world so willingly and without remorse or even consideration for who may be on the other side of things.

Sure, I'm a southern-born-and-bred American man, but rest assured I'm no "dumb redneck." I'm a fairly articulate 27-year-old Floridian with an IQ hovering around the 170 mark, and that's not a horn I go around blowing at full volume. That's something I largely keep to myself, because I think that one's true character has a tendency to speak for itself without much provocation. This is no less true for the unsavory characters on the planet I may come into contact with, because from their actions, whether physical or auditory, they give away what they're made of inside. It's the little tells - like conversations that can't go 6.37 seconds without dropping the word "fuck" in order to express themselves, that make these avatars of the "lowest common denominator" club as easy to spot as a yellow elephant in a daycare playground. That's not to say that I'm not a fan of dropping the f-bomb, as that word gets a lot of respect from me for being the most utilitarian phrase in the entirety of the English language. But there comes a time where you have to put that aside, and actually pick up a book or two, maybe you'll even learn something about expressing yourself as something that's not a caricature of the culture that spawned you. MTV spend a hell of a lot of money doing a good enough job of that already, and here these dudes (and I use the term lightly) seem willing to do that job for the low, low cost of free.

I never thought I'd do this, but I have to quote a comedian loved by "dumb rednecks" the world over.
"You just can't fix stupid." - Ron White

And that, as they say, is that. You could choose to beat them, or join them. Joining them in creatine-fueled hostility would be really easy to do...but kicking the ever-eternal soulshit out of all of those pricks for daring to waste the air that I breathe with their incessant prattling was so much more satisfying. I hope you guys are reading this...but the likelihood of that is pretty slim. You'd have to learn how to read first, fuckwits. Oh, and Dr. Honda says hello. Bitches. >XoD

- EL
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About Everyday Legendone of us since 1:32 PM on 08.24.2009

I am the Everyday Legend, and I am a male, 31-year old Florida native and videogame fan of the most epicurean order. I'm also the father of a very precocious (almost) three-year-old daughter, and a newborn daughter as well!

My natural state: very, very tired.

I got into gaming when I was 5, and my Aunt and Uncle had an NES that they had bought because they thought it was the coolest thing ever. As a matter of fact, they weren't too far off of the mark. I was introduced to Super Mario Bros. and Duck Hunt (naturally), and soon followed up with the very first Zelda. I remember the very first game I beat by myself - Megaman 2, in 1989. I was six at the time.

Shortly after that, I played Street Fighter II for the first time in a local skating rink and was hooked. Bad. Like, smack-habit bad.

I remember playing against the college kids that would come in there to hang out and chill - there was a lounge connected to the place that you had to be 18 to get in - and a lot of these guys used to come in and spend a ton of time and money on playing SFII. I learned how to play from these guys, and within a year, I had become just as good as they were. I was hanging out with people almost twice my age, and conversing with them on their level about a mutual passion - and that's where I've been ever since.

Videogames don't make up my entire life: I cook, I write, I sing, I have a full-time career in IT and am still attending college for a degree in Computer Science, then moving into a Masters in Information Systems Management. Gotta have goals.

Nothing beats a good trip to a good bar where they serve good beer and have a good selection of good tunes. Also, chilled Junmai Ginjo (unfiltered) sake is the nectar of the gods, in case you weren't aware. Of course, those trips are very rare these days, because there is always another diaper to change, and leaving your kid at home in the crib is never an option if you want to be able to look at yourself in the mirror.

Oh, and I really, really love sushi. I can put away amounts of that stuff that some may label as borderline genocidal. I put species of fish on the endangered list singlehandedly. I'm not ashamed. It's their own fault for being born so damn delicious.

XBL (defunct): Everyday Legend
PSN: Everyday_Legend
STEAM: Everyday Legend
Skype: everydaylegend

Your eyes do not deceive you. There's a trend.

See you out there.

- EL
Xbox LIVE:Everyday Legend
PSN ID:Everyday_Legend


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