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LONG BLOG

The Future: Games Are Art Now! It's Awesome!

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Hello friends.

If you are reading this, then that means my invention worked; I now can send objects, electrical signals, etc. BACK IN TIME. It only took a few years after the breakthrough of the Anti-Heisenberg Generator to truly punch this kind of Time Manipulation through, but it seems that I might have finally done it.

Now, before I go onto to send a notice to Harvard Medicine or UCLA the cure for cancer AND an AIDS vaccine, I have a much more important issue to tackle; videogames. Yes, we still have them in the future, and they're pretty sweet. We've got Final Fantasy XVII coming out next year, Team Fortress 4 has been dominating internet cafe's for quite a while now, and Call of Duty 8: Modern Warfare 7 tackled the deep socio-political issues of World War III. I'll get back to you once we see the release of Half-Life 2: Episode 3 next year.

However, obviously the best thing to happen to society in this future I live in is by far the realization that games are indeed art! Hooray! I remember my Great-Grandfather telling me stories of the Great Internet Flame Wars and the Neo-Crusades, and I just remember how terrifying it must have been for people like you good people. I mean, who knew who was right? We're talking important stuff here. Videogames are serious business.

I remember after the release of Denizen Bane, the world stood up and took notice of the power of videogames. Sure, kids now days simply can't appreciate such a masterpiece, which used pure gameplay to get across the most moving story ever told by a videogame. It is surely remembered just like Gears of War 2, which taught us that shooting wives in the mouth is a sad thing, and since it was written by an actual writer, that means it's good. You might think that the previous sentence was grammatically awkward; not so. In the future, we no longer speak English.

Rather, we type it very in a very broken fashion and ad whatever emoticon we wish to get across and it plays upon a digital screen that rests on our Diabetes-induced wheelchairs for all to read. In fact, just typing this letter is taking me so long, I've actually already slept for two nights and see no end in sight.

Oh how I take pity upon you poor people of 2017 (I really hope I put the right number in...). How terrible it must be for you people to not know whether or not games are indeed taken seriously by the media. Afterall, if the media takes sex, violence, and people's personal lives seriously enough to pervert them all for ratings, why shouldn't they do the same for videogames?

Well, when you get this letter, you will truly see how beautiful the future is. Not only have we resurrected Benjamin Franklin AND Arnold Schwarzenegger, two of the greatest Presidents of American History, but we have also reanimated Roger Ebert, given him the ability to talk, and even he agrees! He finally has consented to the gaming population, and wept upon the ending of Halo 6, which is often recognized as the pinnacle of shooting things in slightly-open corridors. How did we resurrect them? You ever read Ubik? Kind of like that, but much shinier.

You see, the future is a beautiful place, where we all know exactly who's right about all subjective matters at all time. Internet geniuses are treated as royalty, despite their naivety and lack of Post-Primary education, and these great men/children are given charge to what does and does not indeed suck. Currently, the new James Cameron movie (You know, the action movie that is charading as deep-thinking film-making) is voted at the top of the FIMDB, with the new Tarintino film at a close second (Hint, people sit around a table and talk about out-dated pop-culture).

However, your concern is not films, as they are called in the future after film students everywhere decided that the term movie is out-dated as it is not pretentious enough, but rather videogames. Now recognized to be at the fore-front of artistic expression, we all rest easy knowing that we can simply go onto the internet and read an article and steal the opinion of the author and use it as our own to make our own arguments. After all, arguing on the internet is now not only productive, but indeed is seen as PMC work in fueling the on-going Second Great Flame Wars: This Time It's Personal.

The future is a beautiful place indeed. It is a place where you can say indeed a lot and not be seen as a douchebag. It is a place where the internet is not only the authority on all subjective issues, but also a haven for future pornography and the selling of penis-enlarging products (Although, now that I think about it, it hasn't changed that much...). And most importantly, videogames are taken seriously, because at the end of the day, a medium is only validated once an ambiguously large number of people we've never met say it is.

With love,
the Future

(P.S. Can anyone give me Jim Sterling's e-mail? I need to warn him about the great assassination attempt at E3, where he attacked by angry [i]Assassin's Creed II[i/] fans. Surprising that they were actually able to do something that wasn't whining...)
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About Canti-samaone of us since 9:47 PM on 08.03.2009

Hello, I'm Trevor Johnson, also known as Canti-sama. I like to write about things including videogames (that should be paramountly obvious at this point...) music, film, and anime, so what you see in this blog is just one part of my pretentiousness! I'm a nit-picky bitch when it comes to basically everything, so excuse me if I seem like kind of an elitist, even though I try not to be. If I had to sum up who I am, I would do it through top 5 lists, so how about we a do a few right now! But before that, since DTOID tends to remove frontpage posts from my c-blog, here's the list of my frontpages, which I thank everyone very much for!

Frontpage Posts:
1. Monthly Musing - I suck At Videogames: Nostalgia's Curse, 8/12/09
2. Promoted Story - Suda 51 and the "Art" of Videogames, 9/6/09
3. Monthly Musing - Nothing is Sacred: Videogames, 10/7/09

-----FAVORITES-----

Top 5 Favorite Videogames:
5. Fallout 3, PC
4. Mega Man X, SNES
3. Shin Megami Tensei: Persona 4, PS2
2. Braid, PC
1. Shadow of the Colossus, PS2

Top 5 Favorite Albums:
5. Death From Above 1979 - You're A Woman, I'm a Machine, 2004
4. Radiohead - O.K. Computer, 1997
3. Aphex Twin - Selected Ambient Works 85-92, 1992
2. Animal Collective - Strawberry Jam, 2007
1. Sonic Youth - Daydream Nation, 1988

Top 5 Films:
5. Brazil, Directed by Terry Gilliam
4. Fargo, Directed by Joel Coen
3. Fight Club, Directed by David Fincher
2. Shaun of the Dead, Directed by Edgar Wright
1. The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly, Directed by Sergio Leone

Top 5 Anime Productions:
5. Spirited Away, Directed by Hayao Miyazaki
4. The Big O, Directed by Kazuyoshi Katayama
3. Cowboy Bebop, Directed by Shinichirō Watanabe
2. Neon Genesis Evangelion, Directed by Hideko Anno
1. Fooly Cooly, Directed by Kazuya Tsurumaki

----OTHER STUFF----
Avery Island: Musical Opinions From Music Geeks
PSN Name: MetalLink1979
Wii Friend Code - 8089-7286-5497-4717
XBL - Metal Link 904 (Note: My Xbox 360 is in possession of my brother, so this is no longer technically my XBL Tag)
Xbox LIVE:Metal Link 904
Steam ID:MetalLink1979
Mii code:8089-7286-5497-4717


 

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