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Fan Script - Ratchet and Clank: All or Nothing [Part 16 of ???]

Things are not boding well for our Lombax hero...

Next part is up!


Part 15 is here.


Ratchet surges into the gigantic, open field of the stadium around him. The air is alive with the deafening crowds, cheering and yelling frantically in unabashed excitement. Around him are the robotic remains of past warriors and destroyed weapons. In front of him, two giant robots clash in a heated hand-to-hand brawl.

On the other side of the field, high in the stands, within the announcer booth, Drek saunters in calmly, meeting with Nefarious, the Thug Leader, and Lawrence. The SCOREKEEPER ROBOT is also there, who seems to be tallying every blow the battling bots are giving each other down below.

I take it everything is ready?

Nefarious mumbles something unclear towards Drek.

What was that?

I said everything is ready! You…

He trails off into another set of unclear obscenities.

Drek gives Dr. Nefarious a look before he turns to the scorekeeper.

These moronic excuses for Rock'em Sock'em Robots are still at it?


...blow them both up.


He presses a button on the console in front of him.

On the battlefield, the mechanical warriors suddenly start beeping. They look down at the small collars that they're wearing; a light flashes on them. The look at each other, helplessly, and give each other a hug while crying.

Their heads explode right off. The audience cheers even louder.

Drek grabs an intercom piece and starts to talk into it, which booms and echo all around the stadium.

Looks like we have a tie!

Cheers fill the air excitedly at that announcement.

But enough with the small fries, folks. It time for the main event! We at the Megacorp-Gadgetron Corporation have managed to acquire, for your entertainment, the most famous and infamous creature the galaxy has ever seen, the intergalactic hero-turned-public enemy number one: ladies and gentlemen, introducing Ratchet!

The crowd replies in a mix of gasps, applause, and boos as every single light and camera focuses on Ratchet, who has to squint. Cameras flash and camcorders roll, watching his every reaction. His horrified face is even on the big screen.

Ratchet has… ahem, agreed to forgo a few years in prison to instead fight for life and death, all for you and your children!

The audience goes nuts.

And which of our sadistic gladiators will the Lombax be going up against? None of them! Instead, he will be going up a brand new enemy! A staple from many of your childhood pasts, coming back to right certain wrongs! Introducing Ace Hartlight two-point-O!

Ratchet's jaw drops as the crowds go wild. The whole battleground begins to shift now. Huge walls and deathtraps sprout from the walls and floors. Two massive tube-like structures slide out from the walls on opposite ends of the stadium. Electric wires, flamethrowers, spikes, sharpened pendulums—all sorts of dangerous torture devices spring up, including two boiling pots of acid under the tubes.

At the far end, a huge cage emerges from the ground upon a tower that rises into the air. Inside is ACE HARTLIGHT 2.0, a robotic version of a perfectly chiseled, handsome specimen of a man, with glowing read eyes.

He squeezes his cage bars, crushing the metal with ease. This makes the audience go crazy.

But that's not all, folks! Ratchet will have forty-five minutes to defeat Ace Hartlight. If he fails…

The numbers "45:00" appears on the corner of the big screen. Above that screen, however, rises what appears to be a giant, mechanical, miniature version of the Death Star. The audience oohs and aahs.

… that device, the Bio-Obliterator, created by the… uh… impressionable Doctor Nefarious, will turn you all into robots, where you will assist me in finishing my original plan of destroyed other planets to create another perfect planet, which I will exploit for my own gain and yadda, yadda, yadda. Don't bother to try and escape, or you will be shot. Thank you.

The audience gasps, although the robotic members still cheer and hoot.

And finally, just to up the ante, and just because I really don't care, at the thirty minute mark…

The two tubes suddenly shift open, revealing Sasha in one pole and Angela in the other. They bang at the glass, but are unable to escape. They are inaudible, but their eyes focus on the captured Lombax.

… Ratchet's two lovebirds will be dropped in two giant vats of boiling acid, forcing him to choose the one who he really pines for, and ignoring the one who he was just stringing along all this time. And that's if he can even get away to save them!

The audience is a mixed bag of emotions of cheers, yells, boos, and cries. Ratchet's concern is on the two females caught in their glass prison. The look on his face is of complete worthlessness.

It all boils down to this. Are you a hero, Ratchet? Or are you just a failure? Time will tell. Let's get it on!

Riding in on a flying hoverboard, Courtney Gears floats down onto the same platform that hosts the captured Ace Hartlight. She blows the robot a kiss before opening the gate, and a the machine comes sprinting out towards Ratchet, leaping over the walls and traps with ease.

Ratchet struggles in his chains as Ace pounds in closer and closer, his steps bending every metal platform he lands on. He leaps high into the air, over Ratchet's platform, and comes flying down, ready to crush the Lombax.

Suddenly, Ratchet's chains come loose. He immediately rolls off the platform as Ace lands on it, hard, ripping into the top like a wrecking ball. The crowd cheers as Ratchet lands on the ground, dodged a swinging sword from nowhere, and hauls tail through the maze of walls and traps.


Elsewhere in the darkened corridors is a room with the rest of the captured crew of the Discovery—Skidd, Helga, Big Al, and Captain Qwark. Qwark, specifically, is playing a harmonica.

Clank, however, is a prison of his own—he's attached to some sort of containment device. His head and feet are plugged into this device, and his eyes are pure white.


Inside Clank's head is another world, all green and composed mostly of lasers and circuitry. Clank, or a version of him, is stuck behind a set of green laser bars. Surrounding the bars is another set of robot ninja-pirates. One speaks, again, where his lips don't match his voice.

Arrg, matey! You won't be escaping this metaphorical representation of your computerized mental state. Ah-ha ha! Ha-ha! Ha!

You are lucky these bars are here. You know I very well can take you all.

Ha-ha! Ha! Those bars are powered by the computer's mainframe! There is absolutely no way that they will ever go off, ever!

All the robot pirate-ninjas start laughing.

The bars suddenly turn off.

The robot pirate-ninjas stop laughing.

Clank gives them a "start running" look.


Ratchet leans up against a wall, tired and bruised, but otherwise still intact. He looks around, making sure no cameras or lights are focused on him.

The booming sounds of Ace's footsteps are heard nearby. Ratchet holds his breath. The steps slowly start to fade away. He releases the air from his lungs and turns the corner—

And runs right into Ace.


He ducks as Ace swings a massive punch, which tears a hole into the metal wall. The Lombax flees again, leaping over flames and avoiding spinning spikes; Ace, being a robot now, runs though it all without a scratch. He even pulls out a laser blaster now, firing endlessly at Ratchet.

The Lombax dodges the blasts, but barely. He struggles to run through his fatigue, but he keeps on going. He turns another corner and ducks down into a small trench. Ace stops running, looking left and right for him.

A whistle noise is heard. Ratchet looks up from his hiding place, and sees Courtney Gears on her hoverboard, pointing right at him.

There he is, Acey-Poo!

Ace Hartlight groans and shakes his head, but then fires his blaster at Ratchet. He leaps out in the nick of time, and hustles out of there, Ace on his tail, Gears tracking him from above.


A final punch knocks the metal teeth out of the remaining robot ninja-pirate. Clank is surrounded by a number of the unconscious machines. He wipes his hands cleanly.

That was easy. Now, who would have released me from that cage?

There's a mechanical, computational sound that occurs behind Clank. He turns around. In the air floats a huge sequence of letters and numbers, flashing before his eyes. He scans them all, carefully, quickly. He gasps.


The coding sequence "opens" up like a door, revealing a giant green screen, completely blank save for a flashing cursor mark. CLANK'S MOM does not speak, but communicates through the text on the screen.

Hello, Clank.

I cannot believe I found you. I mean the odds are astronomical. One billion, four hundred thirty-eight million, nine hundred fifty-six thousand, seven hounded and twelve to one, to be exact.

Precisely. It is good to see you, too, Clank. But, unfortunately, this cannot last. There is something you must do.

What is it?

You must destroy me.

Clank gasps.


The timer ticks down to forty minutes.

Ratchet looks up at both Angela and Sasha. They're trying to be strong while confined but with each second they grow more and more worried. He can only return a helpless look, unable to do anything.

A massive blade flings by Ratchet, knocking him off his feet. He looks up, noticing Gears with a number of those blade-boomerang weapons. She starts tossing them like mad at the Lombax.

He jumps and leaps over each one before rushing out of her line of sight. He slides underneath another swinging pendulum, but is knocked hard against a wall by a swinging pole. Everything goes dizzy for him; he starts stumbling.


Clank shakes his head wildly.

But there must be some other option!

I have scanned every piece of my software. There is no other solution. Drek is using me for his purposes. The weapons in the stadium. The Bio-Obliterator.

Clank is hurt at the choice.

Do not worry. I will always be around, Clank. You once told me that you would try to make me proud.

Clank eyes look up at the screen in surprise.

You already have.

Clank smiles brightly at that message.

Ratchet is in great danger. He needs you. When I free you, Clank, you must tell him this message, for he is the only one that can save you all.

Which message is that?

Clank reads what the screen displays. He nods.

Lights begin to surround Clank. Everything begins to go white.


Clank's eyes slowly fade back to his traditional green color. The device trapping him recedes into the wall, freeing the little robot. He pushes himself up to his knees, then his feet, his face ready for action.

He sprints down the hall, little feet making clanking noises as he runs past the prisons with the rest of the Discovery crew.

It's Clank! And he is free!

Helga, Big Al, Skidd, and Qwark call out to Clank.

Hey! Clank! Save us! Get us out of here! Do you have the key! Open up these bars!

Clank runs right past.


The crewmembers stare at the disappearing Clank blankly.


Ratchet is done. Mentally.

Huffing and puffing as he holds his stomach and barely trots through the death course, the Lombax has nothing left. He leans against the wall, holding his weakened self up. The time reads thirty-six minutes.

A small, round, blinking device lands at Ratchet's feet. His eyes go wide and he tries to climb the wall to escape it.

It explodes and sends Ratchet flying through the air. The entire audience gasps as he lands hard onto the platform sporting Ace's cage.

Drek's laughter is heard through the intercom, all around the stadium.

It looks like it's all over for you, Ratchet. Do feel that? That humiliation? That pain?

Drek's voice grows angrier as he speaks.

That was my pain! That was my humiliation! I want you to feel every single sensation I felt that day you stopped me. You are a failure, Ratchet! And now, everyone knows!

Dr. Nefarious and the Thug Leader look at each other.

Whoa. And I thought I hated the little furball. That guy's off his rocker.

It takes one to know one, sir.

You're telling me. Wait, what?

Whatever, I'm just in it for the bolts.

Drek watches the barely mobile Ratchet with a quiet glee.

The Lombax is indeed feeling those sensations, with those hot lights, floating cameras, and awe-struck spectators helplessly watching.

Ace Hartlight 2.0 approaches the platform slowly, taking his time to reach him. Country Gears smirks, and flies over towards the announcer booth, to watch the final blow with the rest of Ratchet's enemies.

To the Lombax, there is no sound, no noise, no anything. He can barely move, his face frozen in the full realization of absolute disappointment.


-- He sees his sad face within the oasis

-- He records his message to the camera to the Discovery crew

-- He sees the disappointed looks of all his friends on Barlow

-- He reflects on the dream he had on the escape pod

Anyone can fall from grace, but it takes a particularly special someone to bring their friends down with them.

-- He witnesses the helpless faces of Sasha and Angela.


Ratchet slowly closes his eyes. He lets out a breath as if it was his last one.
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About kjohnson1585one of us since 2:43 PM on 06.23.2009

Kevin Johnson is planning to take over the internet one small blog at a time. A Dartmouth grade with a penchant for having fun, drinking, and all things entertaining, Kevin will do his finest to add thoughtful, insightful looks at gaming and video games in general-- but do not worry, he can be just as snarky as the rest of the internet, 4chan excluded.

This person mainly has a "professional" blog at www.totalmediabridge.com; by "professional," he means it doesn't make money and it's really just a general showcase of his writing skill and blogging ability. In due time, however, he will improve it immensely in the months to go, along with a nice, super-secret project in the works. Stay Tuned!

Unfortunately, he isn't into the new gen-systems, because he can't afford them at the moment, due to the bad economy and student loans. But he still games when he can, mostly the unplayed favorites of the previous generation, and at the very least tries to stay current on what's going on, news wise.

So keep your eyes peeled for some particularly interesting stuff in the next year or so!


I'm currently in the process of writing a Ratchet & Clank screenplay exclusively for Destructoid! It takes place between R&C4: Deadlocked (the last PS2 game) and R&C: Tools of Destruction (the first PS3 game). I know fan fics tend to get pushed aside as lame, but so far the criticism has been positive, so hopefully if you do decide to read this, you won't sigh in annoyance.

So enjoy!

Ratchet and Clank: All or Nothing

Part 1.

Part 2.

Part 3.

Part 4.

Part 5.

Part 6.

Part 7.

Part 8.

Part 9.

Part 10.

Part 11.

Part 12.

Part 13.

Part 14.

Part 15.

Part 16.

Part 17.

Part 18.

Updates every Monday, Wednesdays, and Fridays!

PSN ID:kjohnson1585


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