Since I love coming on here and writing up pointless shit, I have decided that I would incorporate my music journalism with my beloved Destructoid. I know that some may not like this, seeing as though Dtoid is a place for gaming, but I find it intriguing when a fellow gamer has something else in common with me.
Music is great, and I love all kinds of it. It is on par with my gaming which is why I have such a passion for writing about it. I write for Buzz Magazine and have interviewed many bands, reviewed albums and live events and done photography for most of the articles I write. Every now and again I like to write up something in the name of humor more than seriousness. And somethings I get in trouble for it. But fuck it, whats life without a little pointlessness?
Defined: Music to Kick Teeth in to is exactly that, although we don't encourage the act of kicking ones teeth in, we can picture it in our minds when we listen to certain songs that bring forth cannibalistic instincts to rip somebodies rib cage open. Here are the top 10 songs that you could put in the background while kicking somebody in teeth. Note: Don't kick people in the teeth, because having teeth removed involuntarily hurts a lot. 10-: American Head Charge - Loyalty http://www.headcharge.com
When I first heard this song, I was going through a bit of hard time trying to figure out why my mate decided to bone the girl I was seeing, so naturally there was a lot of anger in there that needed to be vented. This song made me feel better every time I listened to it because every time I did listen to it, I just pictured myself being over my so called mate, punching his head into the floor. *sigh* memories.
Moment to Kick Teeth: Directly at the 02:22 mark... 9-: Deftones - Elite http://www.deftones.com
One of my all time favorite Deftones songs, pumps from start to finish and never quits till the very end. Vocalist Chino goes ballistic the whole time screaming sounds as if he is venting to himself. But who are we kidding people, music like this is made to vent. Even if you have to kick teeth in to do it.
Moment to Kick Teeth: Directly at 2:46 just after the breakdown. 8-: Dillinger Escape Plan - Panasonic Youth http://www.myspace.com/dillingerescapeplan
If you were to play this song in a church, the worshipers would never return because it just sounds that damn brutal and perfectly insane (yes, insanity can have perfection). Most people can't handle it and will walk away before the song finishes but for the people who stick around to listen to the song as a whole, they are rewarded with an orchestrated piece of metal that is perfect for watching the face of your enemy getting smashed to.
Moment to Kick Teeth: At or around 1:17, just after the guitar break...snap *breaks invisible stick in hands* 7-: Sevendust - Face to Face http://www.sevendust.com
Ok, here are the lyrics during the break:
'That shit you're talkin' don't mean nothing to me anymore
Limp dick...you fuck stick...let's settle the score
Run and hide you know I'll find you anywhere
Motherfucker...two faced prick with hell to pay
What's real is real...it's time to step up to the plate again
Swing batter-batter, swing batter-batter, swing...
What's real is real...it's time to step up to the plate again
Swing batter-batter...fucked me for the last time!'
Moment to Kick Teeth: Directly at 2:26 just after those lyrics. 6-: Pantera - Suicide Note Part II http://www.pantera.com
This song as a whole is true metal, high pitched, fast paced verses and riffy and deep choruses and one of the best break downs ever. The guitar solo is nothing to rave on about, but who cares? If you want to kick teeth in, put this on and practice...like now.
Moment to Kick Teeth: Take your pick, there is about 20 times throughout this song that I can picture kicking somebody who I hate in the teeth. Suggested times: 00:19 Just as enters into the first chorus, 00:53 Just as it breaks into the second chorus, 01:11 Just as it breaks in the first breakdown, 02:13 Just as it breaks into the third chorus...there's heaps more, just listen and kick. 5-: Lamb of God - Now you've got something to Die For http://www.lamb-of-god.com
Even if you hate this band, and even if you hate this song, there is a moment in this song that even the biggest 'sound of music' fan would start nodding their head to and picture crushing the face of their least liked acquaintance to.
Moment to Kick Teeth: At exactly 03:08 make sure the head of your enemy is directly under your raised foot as it comes down (with great satisfaction) 4-: Dry Kill Logic - Rot http://www.myspace.com/drykilllogic
This entire song spills poison from start to finish. You soon start to wish the person in which it was written for or about would be in a lot of pain because there is no way anybody good would have a song like this written about them with such hate. Perfect for smashing heads.
Moment to Kick Teeth: Take a guess... 3-: Meshuggah - Bleed http://www.meshuggah.net
It takes a lot to get me into a new band. I am open minded but sometimes you just need to hear the right song. This song was the one that got me into Meshuggah, but like you care about that. Just listen to this song and step on some fucken heads.
Moments to Kick Teeth: 00:50 and 02:31...my god! 2-: Parkway Drive - Romance is Dead http://www.myspace.com/parkwaydrive
This song has to be one of the most hate filled songs I have ever heard, the guitar breaks and riffs are aplenty and the overall song has an empowering feel to it that would make the high school nerd who gets picked on, get on up and kick some moron sorority teeth in. Who knows, maybe even pick up a rifle and go from room to room, playing duck hunt...with people. Yeah, I went there. Moment to Kick Teeth: 02:03 "So cry me a fucken river, BITCH!" ba dada da dom dom! *air guitars* 1-: Bring me the Horizon - Chelsea Smile http://www.bringmethehorizon.co.uk
Anybody who doesn't know what a Chelsea Smile is, should watch The Dark Knight and take note of The Jokers smile scars, for that, is a Chelsea Smile. A smile which has been cut into the face from the corners of your mouth. Example:
This alone should put into place that this song was written by a bunch of 'not quite right' blokes, for a bunch of 'not quite right' listeners. But who gives a shit, one kid will watch Basketball Diaries and never take Heroin in his life, where as another kid will watch it and get a shotgun and walk around his classroom with a trench coat, taking people out. Different effects for different people. For me? Last time this song came on during a party my friend (DanMazkin) and I, in our drunken states, moshed around the pool...and then drowned everybody else there while stabbing their bodies...Good times.
Moment to Kick Teeth: Take your pick, this song is just one big teeth kicking session.