Although Destructoid's Community Games challenge is for developers to tell us what we should review, a few titles on the service tempt me to "go rogue" and review them anyway. One of them is Rumble Massage, which Wilbo told me about this morning.
It's supposed to use the controller as a massage device for those who have spent too long playing games and getting stiff. Talking of getting stiff, there is only one reason this game could have been invented, and I don't believe it's any of the advertised justifications.
For only 200 points, this filthy helpful little piece of smut software could be yours! Now excuse me while I hope the developer meets our challenge. I need the excuse when my wife walks in on my "playing" it.
Jim Sterling serves as reviews editor for Destructoid.com, head of the Podtoid podcast, and produces a number of news stories, original features, one-of-a-kind videos. With his passionate argumentative style, controversial opinions, harsh delivery, and dedication to brutal honesty Sterling is a name that you can't help but recognize.
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Contest:
5:00 PM on 01.28.2009
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At least its not like Rez when it came with a washable cover
That's what I thought when I walked past a USB massager in Target. Minus the game part...
video review on youporn.com in 3..2..1..
now if you dont mind im going to put my control on epic mode if you know what i mean
women give birth to 7-8 pound babies...im sure a controller the size of a newborn babies head/torso wouldnt be much of a issue.
Perhaps you can wait for the Wii port?
im sure its coming...
@falinter
2 girls 1 controller has been done I believe. Don't ask for the link.
And seriously, why would one spend real money on this when they can just pop in Halo 3, go to a turret, and hold the trigger down. Maybe a rubberband, or something. Seriously, $3? People will buy anything.
I realize this, but women shove things in there im sure would give a fully born baby a run for its money. Chemisty not included.
That being said, how goo resistant are the controllers, anyway?
Holy crap... I could write this in an afternoon....
I'm on it.
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