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Write a ninja haiku, win the Ninja Blade soundtrack! photo

No matter how you spin it, ninjas are eternally cool. I don't know how they manage it, but while things around them become popular, burn out and fade, they still somehow maintain their spot in popular culture. I'd question it, but I have no reason to -- I like ninjas too.

Ninja Blade, the Xbox 360 exclusive that came out this April, may have pleased many a fan of ninjas, and now I have a little something laying around the office that I think may please some of you. We have three copies of the game soundtrack (composed by Norihiko Hibino) up for grabs, which were kindly donated to us by the awesome folks over at Original Sound Version. While you're there, you can actually read their full review on the soundtrack, which is apparently pretty darn good.

How to win it, you say? Simple: write me a haiku in the comments that has something to do with ninjas. In case you aren't familiar with the haiku format, it's very easy -- all you have to do is compose a poem that's 5 syllables in the first line, 7 in the second and 5 in the third. The contest is open to all countries and will run through June 23rd. I expect some seriously hilarious results -- show me what you can do!






Contests Official Rules



No Purchase Required to Enter or Win

1. Eligibility: Destructoid.com contests are usually provided by sponsors who, due to customs and shipping costs (yay budgets), often limit participation to individuals who are legal residents of the fifty (50) United States (unless otherwise stated) and are 12 years of age. We encourage our overseas friends to be super sneaky and make a friend in the United States who can receive your prize, and then you two figure out the customs/logistics. Be cautious about who you trust, obviously. Employees of destructoid.com, their advertising or promotion agencies, those involved in the production, development, implementation or handling of Contests, any agents acting for, or on behalf of the above entities, their respective parent companies, officers, directors, subsidiaries, affiliates, licensees, service providers, prize suppliers any other person or entity associated with the Contests (collectively “Contest Entities”) and/or the immediate family (spouse, parents, siblings and children) and household members (whether related or not) of each such employee, are *not* eligible and will be fired and publicly beaten if are caught participating. All U.S., federal, state and local and regulations apply.

2. Agreement to Official Rules: Participation in the Contest constitutes entrant’s full and unconditional agreement to and acceptance of these Official Rules and the decisions of the Sponsor, which are final and binding. Winning a prize is contingent upon fulfilling all requirements set forth herein.

3. Entry Period: The start and end dates/times of each Contest (the “Entry Period”) will be posted on the applicable Contest site.

4. Entry: To enter a Contest, follow the instructions on the Contest site. Submission will result in one (1) entry. The number of times you can enter the Contest will be posted on the applicable Contest site. The use of any agencies or automated software to submit entries will void all entries submitted by that person.

5. Drawing: At the conclusion of the Entry Period, we will select the names of the potential winners in a random drawing of all eligible entries received during each Entry Period. The number of winners to be selected in a specific Contest will be posted on the applicable Contest site. The odds of being selected as a potential winner depend on the number of eligible entries received during the Entry Period. Potential winners will be contacted via email and will be asked to provide their full name, age and mailing address within a specified time period. If a potential winner does not respond within the timeframe stated in the notification email, we may select an alternate potential winner in his/her place at random from all entries received during the Entry Period. Limit one (1) prize per household per Contest.

6. Requirements of the Potential Winners: Winners will be notified by the e-mail address associated with their account on destructoid.com.com and/or receive a Private Message on destructoid.com.com or through a Twitter Direct Message/Facebook message. Winners have five (5) days from the original message alerting them of their winnings to respond and claim their prize. If no winner comes forward within five business days, the prize will be forfeited and raffled again where Destructoid's hardcore fans are most active (forums/community blogs/facebook group).

7. Prize(s): The prize(s) (including each prize’s approximate retail value) available to be won in a specific Contest will be posted on the Contest site. No cash or other substitution may be made, except by the Sponsor, who reserves the right to substitute a prize with another prize of equal or greater value if the prize is not available for any reason as determined by the Sponsor in its sole discretion. The winners are responsible for any taxes and fees associated with receipt or use of a prize. Prizes will be mailed between 1 to 45 business days after winners have replied with their required info.

8. General Conditions: In the event that the operation, security, or administration of the Contest is impaired in any way for any reason, including, but not limited to fraud, virus, or other technical problem, the Sponsor may, in its sole discretion, either: (a) suspend the Contest to address the impairment and then resume the Contest in a manner that best conforms to the spirit of these Official Rules; or (b) award the prizes at random from among the eligible entries received up to the time of the impairment. The Sponsor reserves the right in its sole discretion to disqualify any individual it finds to be tampering with the entry process or the operation of the Contest or to be acting in violation of these Official Rules or in an unsportsmanlike or disruptive manner. Any attempt by any person to undermine the legitimate operation of the Contest may be a violation of criminal and civil law, and, should such an attempt be made, the Sponsor reserves the right to seek damages from any such person to the fullest extent permitted by law. The Sponsor’s failure to enforce any term of these Official Rules shall not constitute a waiver of that provision. In case of a dispute as to the owner of an entry, entry will be deemed to have been submitted by the authorized account holder of the screen name from which the entry is made. The authorized account holder is defined as the natural person who is assigned to an e-mail address by an Internet access provider, online service provider, or other organization responsible for assigning e-mail addresses for the domain associated with the submitted e-mail address.

9.Release and Limitations of Liability: By participating in the Contest, entrants agree to release and hold harmless the Contest Entities from and against any claim or cause of action arising out of participation in the Contest or receipt or use of any prize, including, but not limited to: (a) unauthorized human intervention in the Contest; (b) technical errors related to computers, servers, providers, or telephone or network lines; (c) printing errors; (d) lost, late, postage-due, misdirected, or undeliverable mail; (e) errors in the administration of the Contest or the processing of entries; or (f) injury or damage to persons or property which may be caused, directly or indirectly, in whole or in part, from entrant’s participation in the Contest or receipt of any prize. Entrant further agrees that in any cause of action, the Contest Entities’ liability will be limited to the cost of entering and participating in the Contest, and in no event shall the Contest Entities be liable for attorney’s fees. Entrant waives the right to claim any damages whatsoever, including, but not limited to, punitive, consequential, direct, or indirect damages.

10. Disputes: Except where prohibited, entrant agrees that any and all disputes, claims and causes of action arising out of, or connected with, the Contest or any prize awarded shall be resolved individually, without resort to any form of class action. All issues and questions concerning the construction, validity, interpretation and enforceability of these Official Rules, entrant’s rights and obligations, or the rights and obligations of the Sponsors in connection with the Contest, shall be governed by, and construed in accordance with, the laws of the Commonwealth of Virginia, without giving effect to any choice of law or conflict of law rules (whether of the Commonwealth of Virginia or any other jurisdiction), which would cause the application of the laws of any jurisdiction other than the Commonwealth of Virginia.

11. Contest Results: To enter the contest without needing to buy/sell anything or request a written copy of the name of the winners, send a self-addressed stamped envelope (stating the specific Contest you are requesting the winners for) to destructoid.com Contest Winners 260 King Street Suite 883, San Francisco California 94107. We run many contests, so please be specific in what you are requesting. Winner requests must be received within thirty (30) days from the end date of the applicable contest (they're always posted on our site though). Winners are usually posted the day following the contest on our contest section.

Lastly, Destructoid has the right to kick your ass and take away your prize if you are a total dickhead, so be cool and don't kick any puppies on your way to victory. Have fun with our contests and be a good sport when you win or lose. Remember: First you get the power, then you get the money, then get the baby.

 




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Colette Bennett is a Destructoid features editor from New Orleans, Louisiana. She is also a founding member of Destructoid's sister sites Tomopop, a toy lover's blog and Japanator, our anime site. Likes Nintendo DS, NES, Silent Hill series, Rhythm games, RPGs Meet the rest of the team



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78 comments | showing # 1 to 50
prev
next 50 comments

Changston's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/09/2009 15:05
Changston
Don't fuck with Shadow.
He'd slit your throat and feed it
to Interceptor.
50 CAL's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/09/2009 15:05
50 CAL
Adjust my black suit
New-Age ninja spandex tight
My nuts are shadow
polander444's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/09/2009 15:07
polander444
Wait, did you hear that?
That mailbox doesn't look right...
Oh shit, a ninja!

*bow*
GamingGoddess's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/09/2009 15:10
GamingGoddess
The glimmer of blades
Caressing and bestowing
Black and silent night

Apparently I'm not creative enough right now to think of a funny one ><.
ME4Twaffle's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/09/2009 15:12
ME4Twaffle
So then I was like,
Hey we should go get pizza!
Suddenly, I died.
Qraze's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/09/2009 15:12
Qraze
QTE ninja?
not what i really wanted
a GOW clone?
LsTr Of SmG's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/09/2009 15:18
LsTr Of SmG
5 syllables in the first line, 7 in the second and 5 in the third.
Kickass Katana?
Manly Spandex and groin bulge?
Ninjas Fuck You Up.
LsTr Of SmG's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/09/2009 15:20
LsTr Of SmG
Woops, I fail. I only had that first line to remind me of how many syllables I was using.
ME4Twaffle's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/09/2009 15:23
ME4Twaffle
Swoosh swoosh swoosh swoosh swoosh,
Swoosh swoosh swoosh swoosh swoosh swoosh slice,
My taco... it is dead.
ME4Twaffle's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/09/2009 15:24
ME4Twaffle
EDIT:
-----------------------
Swoosh swoosh swoosh swoosh swoosh,
Swoosh swoosh swoosh swoosh swoosh swoosh slice,
My taco... is dead.
-----------------------
Is what I meant to write
Senisan's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/09/2009 15:26
Senisan
I wait for the kill
Silent and deadly patience
And boom goes the dynamite
Chronic Logic's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/09/2009 15:28
Chronic Logic
I Failed ninja test.
Killed my teacher in a rage.
Then I passed my test.
Holyetheline's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/09/2009 15:30
Holyetheline
True song of a blade
Music to a ninja
Victim falls on face
Adrian's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/09/2009 15:31
Adrian
creeping through the night
darkness covered my egress
some heads had to roll
LsTr Of SmG's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/09/2009 15:32
LsTr Of SmG
Minding my business
Walking along when Ninjas
steal my giant codpiece
nademagnet's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/09/2009 15:34
nademagnet
A Shimmering Light
Spandex balls fly through the air
Press 'A' to kill things
Half left's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/09/2009 15:34
Half left
Destructoid contest;
More free shit from a crap game?
Conversely, Ninjas.
FS2D's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/09/2009 15:35
FS2D
Haikus are easy
but sometimes they don't make sense
i flipped the f*ck out.
The Timely Howard's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/09/2009 15:38
The Timely Howard
Lost my arms, my legs.
Lords of night, slicing in time.
Sigh... fucking ninjas.
Secret Cow's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/09/2009 15:40
Secret Cow
... ... ... ... ...?
... ... ... ... ... *shink* ...
... ...! ... *fwump* ....
Super Mega Hyper's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/09/2009 15:40
Super Mega Hyper
Avenge Fathers Death

Summon Strength And Fall Off Ledge

Game Too Hard Power Off
RawwrBag's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/09/2009 15:40
RawwrBag
Writing a Haiku
To win stuff from a crap game
Hooray for ninjas!
Mauer's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/09/2009 15:41
Mauer
I am a ninja
Here to give you a nice gift
A KNIFE EYE ATTACK!!!
roboticheartache's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/09/2009 15:48
roboticheartache
I want to give blood
Alas I can not help
Ninjas do not bleed.
Ravana's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/09/2009 15:48
Ravana
Pirates are teh gay
Ninjas R teh l33t H4xx0rs
They pee in your Coke

*Gong*
JynxShot's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/09/2009 15:49
JynxShot
Fly motorcycle
Into airborne gas tanker;
Kill slug. TODOME!
Javet's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/09/2009 15:49
Javet
Silent like the night
Way cooler than a pirate
Ninjas are teh win
Super Drybones's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/09/2009 15:51
Super Drybones
Perched in skyline
Waiting with katana drawn
Pirate best beware
Terry Bogard's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/09/2009 15:51
Terry Bogard
Ninja baseball game
Don't use katana as bat
Injuries ensue
joshhest's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/09/2009 15:53
joshhest
Gentle lotus drifts
steel and blood rend the night sky
Best. Cliche. Ever.
Das Inchworm's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/09/2009 15:59
Das Inchworm
OK, here goes:
Super Drybones's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/09/2009 15:59
Super Drybones
A pregnant virgin
God never touched that girl
A ninja did it
Origin488's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/09/2009 16:01
Origin488
Ninjas Hop Around
Shurikens thrown at light speed
Smash in your face, HARD.
Super Drybones's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/09/2009 16:05
Super Drybones
Ninja be nimble
Ninja be quick, ninja has great
Well trained black dick
LionheartAce's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/09/2009 16:07
LionheartAce
There is a ninja.
You can't see nor hear your death.
There was a ninja.
Space Moose's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/09/2009 16:15
Space Moose
The ninja's erect blade
slowly penetrated the
Fuzzy pink warm flesh
Justice's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/09/2009 16:22
Justice
Self-conscious ninja,
Does black make me look thinner?
Always stares at mirror.

Jumping across buildings,
I am Ninja Blade,
Fake Hayabusa.

A shadow I rest,
Laid against a building I wait,
Until time to strike.

You all hate ninjas,
Is it coz we iz black (dressed)?
Stop hating my game.

I am pink ninja,
My outfit matches my eyes,
Makes easy target.

I am brown ninja,
Lets me poop anytime with ease,
Smell is quite blatant.
Dynomice's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/09/2009 16:43
Dynomice
The sewers are dark
Ninjas ambush pizza boy
Kowabunga dude
Rabspat's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/09/2009 16:43
Rabspat
Ninjas are way cool
Naruto is no ninja
He's a butt pirate
Jack Maverick's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/09/2009 16:46
Jack Maverick
These were pretty fun to think up.

Being a ninja?
It's all about reflexes.
Quick, "Press X to live!"

Kid wearing orange.
Stop yelling, for the last time.
You're not a ninja.

For being well-built,
ninjas are strangely light to
glide on those kite things.

Ninjas, known for swords.
Screw swords, Ryu has a scythe.
Can't compete with that.
spot the spy's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/09/2009 17:01
spot the spy
NINJA BLADE IS MEH
NINJA GAIDEN IS AWESOME
PLEASE GO PLAY SIGMA
Jesus H Christ's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/09/2009 17:17
Jesus H Christ
This poems third line
is stealthy like a ninja
.....
Covertpoet's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/09/2009 17:41
Covertpoet
blade sheathed silent step
stalking as if your shadow
one false step you're dead
Rabspat's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/09/2009 17:47
Rabspat
Spy is like ninja,
striking quickly from the dark,
sapping my sentry.
eYak's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/09/2009 17:52
eYak
The night is silent
Save for a whoosh and a snick
You're already dead
L1qu1dKrystaL's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/09/2009 18:31
L1qu1dKrystaL
Whispers in the wind,
betray no trace of his hand,
taking what is owed.
Super Mega Hyper's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/09/2009 18:31
Super Mega Hyper
Many great Haikus
Only I have failed so far
Cannot count to five
Resonance's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/09/2009 18:34
Resonance
The Tongan Ninja,
Greatest ninja film ever.
follow this here link

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O3FrqpxxI2Q
LemmingLord's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/09/2009 18:54
LemmingLord
.....
.......
.....
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