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Woman tries to use Wii as a credit card machine ... fails photo

Usually, there's nothing funny about a woman abusing her slot, but this one is just too good to pass up. A NeoGAF eyewitness has recounted the tale of how his neighbor -- a poor, unassuming, completely out-of-touch woman -- tried to make a purchase on her Wii ... by jamming three credit cards into the disc slot!

After having to ask what a Virtual Console was, the would-be big spender had been informed that she could purchase games for the Wii by taking it online and then "putting in her credit card" when prompted. She took it literally. When the first card failed to do anything, she believed she had to keep putting them in until there was enough to make it work. Somehow she has survived to adulthood without getting killed. 

It doesn't help that she also cracked open her Wii Speak device somehow while putting it on top of the Wii remote's sensor bar. These are the people that publishers want to see more of in the market. These are the people now known as gamers. 

As with all truly stupid people, the woman blames the person whose advice she foolishly misinterpreted and now expects compensation. She is, to use the scientific term, one dumb bitch. 

The story is almost too stupid to be true, but by the same token, it's too funny not to take a chance on posting. Besides, in a world where people get mason jars shattered in their rectums, I'm willing to accept any tale of human idiocy.


Continue: More Wiitards stories





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95 comments | showing # 1 to 50

Atlas's Avatar
Atlas at 12/29/2008 21:04
You moved to Mississippi, didn't you Jim? These people are your neighbors.
ThunderHeartXI's Avatar
ThunderHeartXI at 12/29/2008 21:07
I hope whoever she is seeking compensation through laughs her stupid ass right out of the door. This is why I prefer natural selection.
pedrovay2003's Avatar
pedrovay2003 at 12/29/2008 21:11
Oh my God in Heaven. I seriously don't have a single thing to say about this.
Diverse's Avatar
Diverse at 12/29/2008 21:15
bitches man bitches
Intruder's Avatar
Intruder at 12/29/2008 21:17
I honestly cannot comprehend how stupid you would have to be...
SnakeDude4Life's Avatar
SnakeDude4Life at 12/29/2008 21:18
vexed alex's Avatar
vexed alex at 12/29/2008 21:19
I give Jim a few months before moving away from those awful fly-over states.

----

"Somehow she has survived to adulthood without getting killed."

We make it too easy for stupid people to survive. We're not letting Darwin's theory of evolution work in our favor.
Redzie's Avatar
Redzie at 12/29/2008 21:21
RTFM. RTFM
Blind assassin's Avatar
Blind assassin at 12/29/2008 21:21
Ugh, you had to mention the mason jar in the rectum didn't you? That is one of the most disturbing things I've ever tangentially experienced in my life. It's not as gag-worthy as something like two-girls-one-cup but it's some messed up shit.

More topically, yeah, this woman is a fucking idiot. I hope that whatever lawyer she attempts to soil with this case points at her and laughs like she deserves. Why do fucktards always think they deserve compensation for being idiots? The ones that would let it slide (people actually suffering mental retardation) tend to be the ones that actually deserve compensation.
garison's Avatar
garison at 12/29/2008 21:24
What's a videogame?
Artemus's Avatar
Artemus at 12/29/2008 21:26
Make things idiot-proof and the world will make a better idiot.
My gawwwwwwwwwwwwd.
Hate to see how she makes a frozen pizza!
welkstar's Avatar
welkstar at 12/29/2008 21:26
wow.





wow.
Mushman's Avatar
Mushman at 12/29/2008 21:26
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Best news story I have read today! I guess stupidity has no bounds. :D
dprime's Avatar
dprime at 12/29/2008 21:31
...oh, you can't do that. Now I see. Thank you.
Daxelman's Avatar
Daxelman at 12/29/2008 21:32
It's the end of the world as we know it and I feel fine...in my pants.
ace of knaves's Avatar
ace of knaves at 12/29/2008 21:33
Sounds familiar.
rodjoh's Avatar
rodjoh at 12/29/2008 21:39
She fails at life really.
PsychoSoldier's Avatar
PsychoSoldier at 12/29/2008 21:45
Should have stayed in the kitchen.
BS3 Owner's Avatar
BS3 Owner at 12/29/2008 21:50
I bet she's REAL good with Slot Machines. ;P
dgonchild's Avatar
dgonchild at 12/29/2008 21:52
LMAO. I think I know a female or 2 that would do something that ridiculous, so I believe it.
killatia's Avatar
killatia at 12/29/2008 21:54
STUPID! That all i need to say about the woman.
gitrooman's Avatar
gitrooman at 12/29/2008 22:07
The Wii's target audience.
Projectexodus's Avatar
Projectexodus at 12/29/2008 22:22
Wow... It doesnt work the first time, so she tries a second, then third time... wow...
Maziar's Avatar
Maziar at 12/29/2008 22:28
what game was she buying?
RonBurgandy2010's Avatar
RonBurgandy2010 at 12/29/2008 22:31
Goddammit, I fucking love this place.
dollrapist's Avatar
dollrapist at 12/29/2008 22:37
It must've been the pretty blue light that made her think it could be used in such a way.

stupid bitch.
Chaotic Life's Avatar
Chaotic Life at 12/29/2008 22:45
Someone should tell her the wii takes blood for payment.
Corak's Avatar
Corak at 12/29/2008 22:45


Most likely she drives like this too.
Xhumation's Avatar
Xhumation at 12/29/2008 22:46
Aw..hell.

I think I'm gonna cough up a lung if I keep laughing so hard. Does this woman ever forget how to breathe too?
naia-the-gamer's Avatar
naia-the-gamer at 12/29/2008 22:52
This is the greatest story I have ever read. I can't believe how stupid people are...
Origim's Avatar
Origim at 12/29/2008 22:55
I wonder where else she's jammed those credit cards. If you read the actual account a NeoGaf, the guy goes on to state that she expects him to pay for the repairs. I also wonder what this idiot credit card debt amount is given she jammed three cards in there.
Kasmodiah's Avatar
Kasmodiah at 12/29/2008 23:25
That woman is obviously a /b/tard and a RL troll so she did that for the lulz. No one can actually be that stupid and breathe on their own. It's not possible.

Can we now get pics of her abusing her slot?
Zodiac Eclipse's Avatar
Zodiac Eclipse at 12/29/2008 23:29
@Origim I guess she isn't a math wiz in her spare time so yeah her credit can't be too good either.
Druid 01's Avatar
Druid 01 at 12/29/2008 23:32
rolf
pedrovay2003's Avatar
pedrovay2003 at 12/29/2008 23:33
I think Ace was trying to link to this.
s0lesurviv0r's Avatar
s0lesurviv0r at 12/30/2008 00:14
That's not as bad as a co-worker asking me if it's okay to put a foil container into a microwave.
pedrovay2003's Avatar
pedrovay2003 at 12/30/2008 00:29
@s0lesurviv0r

I have to disagree, I think this is worse. At least that coworker asked you about it first.
Lilee Bear's Avatar
Lilee Bear at 12/30/2008 00:43
What kind of dumb ass would do that? is her IQ 2??
What the hell is her preoblem.
I cant stop laughing but how stupid could you get??
I hope whoever she expects compensation from laughs her ass off the planet.
o_O Wow i honestly didnt think there were people with that ammount of idiocy...
Humans just get more interesting by the second... *sigh*
RoMeRtHeGaMe's Avatar
RoMeRtHeGaMe at 12/30/2008 00:43
Is that why I haven't been able to purchase Super Mario RPG?!
ace of knaves's Avatar
ace of knaves at 12/30/2008 01:07
@pedrovay2003
Thanks, I suck.
Mxyzptlk's Avatar
Mxyzptlk at 12/30/2008 02:36
I wonder how many cd-rom trays she's broken thinking they were cup holders?
dprime's Avatar
dprime at 12/30/2008 03:27
This is proof democracy doesn't work.
Mr Television's Avatar
Mr Television at 12/30/2008 03:33
Not particularly wanting to sound like a prude, but I find it slightly disturbing that the author gets away with wearing what appears to be mild misogyny on his sleeve (I am referring to the fact that he called the subject of the post a bitch). While the lady in question is indeed very naive and daft, what is the point of calling her a bitch? I'm sure this will be considered an irrelevant opinion and that's fine, it's just that when I read this story I just thought it was ugly. It made me feel sad, not because of the silly lady, but because calling a woman a bitch for being stupid is something that no one on Destructoid bats an eyelid about.
Mr Wrighty 987's Avatar
Mr Wrighty 987 at 12/30/2008 03:53
what a stupid BITCH!
Usedtabe's Avatar
Usedtabe at 12/30/2008 04:08
@Mr Television: I think it's time you turned yourself off. It's a mere word, get over it.


@Article: LOL. I am not in the least suprised. I have met many, many women who have done things of similar stupidity.
CrocBox's Avatar
CrocBox at 12/30/2008 04:14
This may have just made my night lol
Mr Television's Avatar
Mr Television at 12/30/2008 04:40
Usedtable:

The "it's just a word" argument is total nonsense. Language is one of the things that makes us human. The importance of words to human beings is second only to shelter and food. I just don't like the tone of the post. It is ugly and vaguely misogynist.
Mr Television's Avatar
Mr Television at 12/30/2008 04:46
To clarify: the reason I don't like words like "bitch" is because there is no equivalent word to direct a men.
SetoChaos's Avatar
SetoChaos at 12/30/2008 05:58
This is ridiculous, how can anyone possibly be that stupid. I be she's also one of the people that thinks you can insert an N64 cartridge into a PS3...
Rosseh's Avatar
Rosseh at 12/30/2008 06:02
Women call men dogs sometimes, that's technically the equivilent :P

Bastard? Dickhead? Cock? Prick? Tosser? There's tons of insults that are prodominently aimed at men.

I like it, she truely is a dumb bitch. It shows how little we think of her by using those terms.
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