Up until as recently as a week ago, everyone thought Nintendo's marketing staff were sitting around on their laurels, sipping coffee and making small talk. What with Sony having started advertising the PlayStation 3 as early as a month ago, people wondered what the hell Nintendo was doing. Not an ad in sight ... no hoardings ... no banners ... nothing. What ever were they doing?! Turns out they were SCHEMING. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, it is all clear now. Nintendo's marketing team had locked themselves up, away from the rest of the world, plotting and planning in their secret lair how they would advertise the big N's new baby. So, what happens when the marketing staff of one of the most innovative companies in the gaming industry starts to brainstorm? Hit the jump to find out. It all started with some Nintendo swag Robert received in the mail recently. A copy of Brain Age for the DS was included, along with a Brain Age snow globe and a 2006 fall catalog with info on the DS, Wii, GameCube and GBA. Apparently, Robert wasn't the only one. Others endowed with the power of the press had received similar packages from Nintendo as well. What was going on? What ever had driven Nintendo to behave in a fashion similar to that of a seductive female gambler at an expensive casino in Vegas? Teasing everybody by pulling up their skirt just far enough to give us a flash of their Wii (I can't believe I just did that), yet refusing to let us touch the damned thing (That, too) ... cruelty at its peak. But it didn't stop there ... oh no. Check out this little baby, displayed at the Nintendo World Store in NYC. As reported by Wii-volution, four functional Wiis were on display at the back of the store with stock footage of previously screened videos up and running in high quality. However, there were no controllers to be seen, and actual game play was not possible. Apparently, Nintendo was still not ready to put out. However, this doesn't mean they weren't willing to lead us on a little more. OK, a lot more. Wii advertising went into full swing as the big N rolled out the meat of its advertising campaign. The following images were posted at Moz La Punk earlier today. The first is the Wii display at Best Buy stores. Now, we're talking! This is the Nintendo equivalent of unzipping our pants while carefully, yet surely slipping their fingers into the depths of our sacred regions, and starting to perform what I can best desribe as "foreplay." Of course, we all know what comes after touching and feeling. Check out their advertising at the Toys R Us store over at Times Square in NYC. If your privates aren't stirring up at the sight of that 3-story ad, you are sexually dysfunctional. So, the Wii already has Best Buy, Gamestop, Toys R Us, and the Nintendo World Store rooting for it ... what else could it want? Why, K-mart, of course! (Anyone else notice how the PS3 is mysteriously absent from that list?) So, with their advertising campaign in full swing in the United States, practically every major store supporting them and their American fans greedily drooling over the future prospect of slipping the Wii out of its box with their own two hands and getting it on, what would Nintendo do next? Move on to Europe. "Nintendo has announced to the great and the good in the UK’s videogames retail industry that it is planning an £18 million marketing blitz for the Wii and the DS. This will -- it’s hoped -- enable it to target the widest range of British consumers: young and old, male and female, gamer and non-gamer," say the folks down at SPOnG.com. Rob Lowe, Wii product manager, stated that 80% of people in the UK would see the Wii TV ads a minimum of three times. The ads will be aired on Channel 4, Channel 5, Sky One and all the other main digital channels in the UK. 60-second executions will be placed into all major Christmas family films and TV events. Of course, Nintendo wouldn't be where it is this year without that little Dual Screen handheld everyone loves so much. That said, they are spending no less than £6m on intensive DS marketing between now and Christmas. All right, Nintendo ... we've said if before, and we'll say it again. We're sorry for ever doubting you. You've made your point. Your new baby is godly ... its omnipresence has us all dropping our jaws in awe as saliva dribbles out the side of our mouths and we fantasize about playing with your Wii. We apologize. Once again, all together now.... CONSOLE KOMBAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT!!!!!
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