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You think I'm joking.

You think I'm being smug, or ironic when I say that Mr. Resetti, the pictured mole from Animal Crossing, is the most heroic videogame character in history. You laughed at his antics when he yelled at you, the player, for resetting your game without saving; you angrily shouted at him when he showed up as an assist trophy in Brawl.  You think I'm having a laugh.

The truth is, you have no idea how heroic Mr. Resetti is. Have you ever considered that he is the only person -- the only person -- protecting the entire Animal Crossing unvierse from destruction? That he is the self-appointed defender of the entire village, as he frequently contends with a power (in the form of you, the player) which he cannot hope to ever truly control? That this simple little mole forever fights a losing battle against God Himself in order to protect the lives of his friends?

Hit the jump, and I'll explain further. 

 

The Last of the Time Lords

Resetti the Mole is the only character in the Animal Crossing world whose sole job is to protect the entire universe from paradoxical destruction. Resetti makes sure the game world's timeline doesn't contradict itself. Resetti stands, ever ready, to defend the integrity of his world's timeline against any and all oppressors who would seek to manipulate that timeline for their own personal gain.

In other words, you.

You are the demon who, at every turn, holds the power (and often the desire) to leave the world of Animal Crossing without saving. You endeavor to cheat the system, to manipulate the world in such a way that your actions do not have negative consequences. You ignore the fact that by resetting without saving, you complicate and harm the Animal Crossing village's timeline -- a timeline which, if filled with enough paradoxes, would altogether cease to exist. Unlike most games, Animal Crossing takes place in a persistent world; even if you aren't playing, the characters still go about their business and the world continues...so long as the world's timeline remains paradox-free.

Without Resetti, you'd think it's okay to quit without saving, erasing your progress simply because you gave a letter to the wrong character in the village. You'd think these little paradoxes are harmless; so what if the village is persistent? It's not going to make much of a difference if a character simultaneously does and doesn't have a letter, right? Or if a huge gap of time ceases to exist in the village's timeline simply because you quit a four-hour play session without saving? Resetti is literally the only thing stopping the entire village from collapsing inward on itself due to your paradoxes and contradictions. 

You are trying to destroy the Animal Crossing village. Mr. Resetti exists to stop you. 

 

Mole vs. God 

You, as player, hold complete power over the Animal Crossing world. Simply by your decision to give gifts or find fossils, you can be held solely responsible for characters entering or leaving the village. By using your real-world powers, you can turn the console off at any time; you can break the Animal Crossing disc into tiny pieces, severing your portal to the world of the village. You, as a human player living in the "real" world, have absolute power over the inhabitants of the Animal Crossing village.

You are God.

Resetti must defeat you.

Mr. Resetti's sacrifices are much more admirable when one considers he fights an enemy he cannot possibly defeat -- you, the player. You live entirely outside his game world, and are thus impervious to any direct assault. Just think of the balls that takes. Resetti intentionally took it upon himself to wage war with an invulnerable deity on a daily basis. Religious people love to throw around the adjective "God-fearing" as if it were a compliment, but Resetti is heroic specifically through his lack of such an emotion.

Resetti certainly does not enjoy his job -- the word "disgruntled" comes to mind -- but he fulfills his duty anyway, for the sake of the universe and because no one else will.

 

Unconventional warfare

Resetti is forever faced with a conundrum: how does one defeat a God? Being confined to his Gamecube, Resetti cannot exit the game and slap your hand away from the reset button, in the same way we couldn't climb up to Heaven and backhand Jehova for creating cancer. Initially, it would seem that Resetti is completely powerless to stop the player from resetting without saving. 

Thankfully, however, Mr. Resetti has a few tricks up his sleeve. As the Player-God cannot be harmed with conventional weaponry, Mr. Resetti uses a far more effective and ingenious tool: annoyance.

Should the player reset without saving, Resetti will do anything in his power to annoy the player so strongly that said Player-God will hopefully refrain from ever touching the reset button. 

Resetti engages in progressively more irritating tactics in order to get his point across. Initially, he'll just give long-winded lectures to the player, pointing out the problematic nature of said player's actions. Later on, he'll make you write a long letter to him, apologizing for your actions. Eventually, he'll even perform a fake-reset, frightening the player into thinking all their data from that day was lost. He turns out to have been bluffing, of course -- he does not have the godlike power that you do -- yet the player still feels the same fear and aggravation that Resetti feels on a daily basis. Hell, he even shows up in a different game (Super Smash Bros Brawl), just to further irritate the player and drive his point home!

These tactics are, to put it bluntly, goddamned brilliant. Resetti uses his limited resources as a mere mole and inhabitant of the game to irritate, inconvenience, and otherwise hinder player progress whenever possible. He doesn't need to resort to violence or threats; he simply uses his powers of irritation when they are needed.

 

Winning a losing battle

I know that a great many gamers in the world despise Mr. Resetti. They call him an annoying, arrogant, asshole of a mole who disrupts the flow of gameplay and pisses them off when they should be having a relaxing time, fishing and collecting furniture in some sort of consumerist heaven. They cannot stand Resetti -- which means, of course, that he's winning.

Resetti fights with a God, and he wins. Sooner or later, the player will stop resetting, and the Animal Crossing village will be safe. Players may decry Resetti's methods, or bitch and moan everytime his assist trophy shows up in Brawl; they may argue with every aspect of his methods and personality.

Resetti does not care.

Resetti gets results.

Resetti  holds the fate of an entire world on his shoulders as he fights God Himself, and he actually wins.

He's the most heroic videogame character of all time. Period. 

Apart from Solid Snake, anyway.


Continue: More Animal Crossing stories





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78 comments | showing # 1 to 50

A Humble Mr Perfect's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/18/2008 14:02
A Humble Mr Perfect
articles like these are pretty much why I joined Destructoid. Top Notch, Rev.
Brahms's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/18/2008 14:04
Brahms
I've been hesitant to use this particular adjective, but this article warrants it.

This piece if Epicly Radtacular.
Brahms's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/18/2008 14:05
Brahms
is*, damnit.
Jordan Devore's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/18/2008 14:06
Jordan Devore
I totally fell for the fake reset the first time he did it.
Cheeburga's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/18/2008 14:09
Cheeburga
I love you.
LionheartAce's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/18/2008 14:09
LionheartAce
Awesome. Don't fuck with the Resetti
Rockvillian's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/18/2008 14:10
Rockvillian
Great article Rev.

Resetti always reminded me of the Gopher from the animated Winnie the Pooh. Not really FROM the world of the characters, but IN the world enough to prove he knows something they don't, and they will all cease to exists once the book is closed, the VHS is ejected, or in AC's case, the console/game is turned off.

Spooky.
Chad Concelmo's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/18/2008 14:11
Chad Concelmo
Awesome article, Anthony. :)
Cowzilla3's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/18/2008 14:12
Cowzilla3
I wouldn't think one would be able to pull this out into a full piece this well but you have done it. Bravo Rev.
bovine's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/18/2008 14:16
bovine
Animal Crossing (and WW) is the greatest game of all time. Mr.Resetti made me feel so bad for forgetting to save. His words punish my very essence.
GuitarAtomik's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/18/2008 14:16
GuitarAtomik
"You are God. Resetti must defeat you."

That needs to be put on a t-shirt. Awesome job man.
Colette Bennett's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/18/2008 14:18
Colette Bennett
Yes! This was awesome, Anthony. Made me want to replay AC all over again.
eternalplayer2345's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/18/2008 14:20
eternalplayer2345
This will forever change my perspective of Resetti.The little guy is a total badass now. Also, I'm pretty sure Resetti wouldn't need 3 games to take down his clone borther. 1ST GAME he would be spewing endless ridicule and annoying stories agiasnt him. Eventually, His brother would just say "Man, it's not worth it."
Spartacus's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/18/2008 14:24
Spartacus
I think every game needs a Resetti.

As for a way to defeat Resetti, I think the only way is to hope he eventually winds up looking in a mirror and starts talking.
Scary Womanizing Pig Mask's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/18/2008 14:27
Scary Womanizing Pig Mask
I'm not joking when I say that this is one of my favorite things I've read on the Internet in a while. Fantastic job!
Wexx's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/18/2008 14:33
Wexx
Ugggh, now I want to play AC again. But I will refrain, at least until a wii version comes out...
blehman's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/18/2008 14:34
blehman
Dammit...now I'm gonna HAVE to play Animal Crossing. =(
Elitechief27's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/18/2008 14:41
Elitechief27
Nice write up Anthony.



Was it just me, or did that blog sound a lot like One Flew Over The Cookoo's Nest?
Slick Icarus's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/18/2008 14:46
Slick Icarus
I had to quit playing Animal Crossing:WW because it ate up too much of my free time. I'm scared to resume because I know I'm up to my neck in friggin' weeds.
Tubatic's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/18/2008 14:47
Tubatic
whoa.

So they made one of these for DS, right? :)

That's a pretty amazing analysis. That's a concept Kojima could write one of this crazy destructo-games on.

It kind of reminds me of playing Omikron, and realizing that the game world was aware of itself as a game, and that your soul, inarguably, was trapped in the game, which I never beat.

Maybe that's why I feel so empty to this day . . .
smurfee mcgee's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/18/2008 14:49
smurfee mcgee
*stands up & applauds*
Phoenix Gamma's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/18/2008 15:00
Phoenix Gamma
I scratched my Animal Crossing disc. Said universe is now destroyed.

PG: 1
Resetti: 0
iwontusemyname's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/18/2008 15:03
iwontusemyname
great article, rev. but i still think he's a fucking asshole.

i mean, yeah, he gets results, but he only gets them by being a cock. that's not a good life lesson. that's not good for anyone.

he's the video-game equlivient of a rent-a-cop. sure, he might be right, but he doesn't have to be such a goddamn prick about it, even if he is "winning".

but fantastic article.
MechaMonkey's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/18/2008 15:04
MechaMonkey
Mr. Rosetti scourges my soul with his mighty pickax.

Brilliant article.
NihonTiger90's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/18/2008 15:05
NihonTiger90
Nobody messes with Resetti.

Also, I have the plush Resetti. He is ten hundred kinds of awesome.
NobodysDream's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/18/2008 15:07
NobodysDream
I love you Rev. I love you so fucking much.
mistic's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/18/2008 15:13
mistic
Fucking...AWESOME

yeah I've had my fights with him! and I caved in :-(
pendelton21's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/18/2008 15:14
pendelton21
Rev, I WANT TO BEAR YOUR CHILDREN!!!
LarkOhiya's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/18/2008 15:34
LarkOhiya
I reset while he is chewing me out. I don't need to take that crud. coincidently I'll turn on my game JUST to turn it offf without saving! HAH TAKE THAT YOU MOLE.
Yuphrum's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/18/2008 15:54
Yuphrum
Fantastic article, Resseti is badass!
godkow's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/18/2008 15:57
godkow
Simply brilliant.
Verol's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/18/2008 16:10
Verol
"Made me want to replay AC all over again."
How in the hell do you replay AC?


Also Phoenix Gamma... You didn't win, Resetti lives on in the hearts and eyes of children everywhere.
SWE3tMadness's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/18/2008 16:36
SWE3tMadness
Wow, definitely one of the best articles I've seen yet here on D-Toid. I have a lot more respect for the dude now. xD

You see, I hated his guts for the longest time, because the only time I ever reset the game was when the power went out. And then Resetty pops up to lecture me about the dangers of instant gratification. It pissed me off to no end.
Justice's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/18/2008 16:37
Justice
Superb article as always Rev.
braulio09's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/18/2008 16:43
braulio09
Epically Radtacular, indeed.
Dexter345's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/18/2008 16:47
Dexter345
Bravo.
ace of knaves's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/18/2008 17:14
ace of knaves
After reading the intro I was planning to comment, "No, I think you are having a laugh," but Goddamn it Rev you won me over. You're brilliant, we should all bow down to you, etc.
Necros's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/18/2008 17:28
Necros
I love you.
Das Inchworm's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/18/2008 17:32
Das Inchworm
Mr. Ressetti was one of my favorite videogame characters before I read this becasue He was an awesome asshole. Now if people ask me, I can get all philisopical and shit.
Murumasa123's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/18/2008 17:42
Murumasa123
Bloody good article i actually stopped a match in SSBB first time i say him to read what he said.
hood_954's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/18/2008 17:43
hood_954
Kudos to you Mr. Anthony. Kudos are in dire order.
Slaughterhouse Five's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/18/2008 17:46
Slaughterhouse Five
So basically...
-PL-'s Avatar - Comment posted on 06/18/2008 17:47
-PL-
I never had any run-in's with Resetti until I started letting my nieces play Animal Crossing. Now, I have his theme song memorized. That guy's a dick, but he's only a dick to those that are deserving (or those that play after the deserving lazily turn the game off without resetting.)
DaedHead8's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/18/2008 17:55
DaedHead8
What a great read. You've done it again Rev.
Eschatos's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/18/2008 17:55
Eschatos
Give this man his own video game!
StratoFabio's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/18/2008 18:15
StratoFabio
Dear Mr. Sir Citizen Reverend Anthony,

I looked ALL AROUND this site for a way to get in touch with you, and found that there were none to be found.

To make a long story short, I want to ask your permission to translate this AMAZING piece of <s>journalism</s> wisdom and publish it on my own (hopefully) amazing gaming blog, www.continue.com.br for the appreciation of all the brazilian gaming community. Several times I wanted to ask this in regards to other of your articles, but couldn't quite bring me to write to you, sir, but today... <a href="http://www.eegra.com/show/sub/do/browse/cat/comics/id/9">you won the internet</a>. I MUST do my part to transmit this <s>article</s> wisdom to everyone in Brazil that can't read in english.

Of course I will give you and DToid all the credit that is due (I already link to here all the time anyways). And you can even leave a message to all the brazilians out there. Remember: the women in Brazil are HOT.

Reach me at stratofabio at gmail dot com if you want to authorize or send me to the pits of hell to play Jenga on the Wii. Thanks.
StratoFabio's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/18/2008 18:17
StratoFabio
Aw, no HTML? Well, you get the idea.
cjpkiller's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/18/2008 18:20
cjpkiller
snake
"I'm no hero"
DynamicSheep's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/18/2008 18:20
DynamicSheep
Mr. Resetti vs. Hideo Kojima in MGS5!
Wedge's Avatar - Comment posted on 06/18/2008 18:28
Wedge
+1
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