Not the kind of headline you'd expect on a gaming blog, I fully admit, but just look at that contraption! This device, which I am still attempting to make sense of, is an automated onanism machine known as the SOM, otherwise labeled a "dream" device developed to work with erotic game Cross Days.
The machine moves in real time to correspond with on-screen movement during "climax scenes", which is a flowery way of saying that it pretends to shag you. Connecting to your computer via a USB cable, developer Overflow (haha) promises that all you need do is "Install SOM and experience a next-gen reality!"
According to the manufacturer, there is a version for ladies, which I could never post here for fear of losing my job, as well as a handheld model. Fun for all the family.
Whatever happened to some Vaseline and a copy of Razzle magazine?
Get more destructoid: We're indie-run, blogging for the love of it, and our site will always be free. Optionally, you can support us and get: (1) Faster pages from our cloud server (3) Wide(r)screen (3) No big ads on Dtoid, Japanator, Tomopop, or Flixist (4) Auto contest entries, and (5) Dibs on betas & downloads. Try it out
Unsavory comments? Please report harassment, spam, and hate speech to our moderators, and flag the user (we will ban users dishing bad karma). Can't see comments? Apps like Avast or browser extensions can cause it. You can fix it by adding *.disqus.com to your whitelists.