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When wanking gets this complicated, you should stop

8:02 AM on 12.08.2008
When wanking gets this complicated, you should stop photo

Not the kind of headline you'd expect on a gaming blog, I fully admit, but just look at that contraption! This device, which I am still attempting to make sense of, is an automated onanism machine known as the SOM, otherwise labeled a "dream" device developed to work with erotic game Cross Days

The machine moves in real time to correspond with on-screen movement during "climax scenes", which is a flowery way of saying that it pretends to shag you. Connecting to your computer via a USB cable, developer Overflow (haha) promises that all you need do is "Install SOM and experience a next-gen reality!"

According to the manufacturer, there is a version for ladies, which I could never post here for fear of losing my job, as well as a handheld model. Fun for all the family.  

Whatever happened to some Vaseline and a copy of Razzle magazine?

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YouPorn is sponsoring an eSports team

YouPorn, which a cursory Google search tells me is a streaming adult video webpage, has announced its sponsorship of a Spanish eSports team (Hearthstone, League of Legends). Play2Win will now be known as Team YP, which s...more

1:15 PM on 05.16.2013
Hardcore pornography CONFIRMED for Next Xbox

SugarDVD, purveyor of such fine films as What An Asshole and Hairy Asian Schoolgirls Masturbate, has confirmed it'll be bringing its adult entertainment streaming services to Microsoft's next-generation Xbox.  The servic...more

7:00 PM on 03.18.2013
Promoted blog: Gaming's greatest cocks

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