Here it is. The most comprehensive video yet of the latest iteration of the most technical, hardcore three-dee fighting game available.
So why am I unimpressed?
Sure, it looks pretty. Sure, I'm pleased that they aren't trying to impress me with digitized "bewbies". Sure, I'm even kinda captivated by Kage's half mask. In the end though, this looks incredibly similar to a high-definition upgrade for the last-generation Virtua Fighter 4. I see nothing that wasn't in place in the last sequel and save a couple shinier textures and more detailed backgrounds, if you told me this was Virtua Fighter 4, I probably wouldn't assault you in a murderous rage.
Sega, we realize you've gone totally insane. You gave a hedgehog a gun and you somehow started screwing up the Monkey Ball series. How you can ruin a series whose premise (monkeys + balls = awesome) almost guarantees success is beyond me, but let's hope that the syphilis hasn't spread to the Virtua Fighter wing of Sega HQ.
[Big ups to Detry for tossing this celluloid abortion my way]
Already done everything in Metal Gear Solid V: Ground Zeroes? Try rolling everywhere
6:00 PM on 01.28.2015