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★ destructoid | Associate Editor ★
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Brett will sell you things in a dark alley -- mostly counterfeit watches and kidneys.
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8:00 PM on 04.13.2015

Maybe Ripley's arms are made of fire?

In what was probably an alternate ending to Alien: Isolation, Amanda Ripley looked down and noticed that her arms were fire. How she went through decades of life without realizing that her limbs were constant chemical combus...

Brett Makedonski

5:00 PM on 04.13.2015

Microsoft's unreasonable demands caused Phantom Dust dev's demise

Around this time last year, rumors were swirling surrounding a Phantom Dust reboot for Xbox One. It was eventually announced at E3 2014, but it hasn't come to fruition, and it's on an indefinite hold as of now. However, ...

Brett Makedonski

3:15 PM on 04.13.2015

Lara Croft's in a new mobile runner »\_(ツ)_/»

Crystal Dynamics has announced a new mobile runner titled Lara Croft: Relic Run. The name's fittingly nebulous. Is Lara running after relics? Or, is the old-school Lara the running relic, a classic character hearkening back t...

Brett Makedonski

12:45 PM on 04.13.2015

Galahad's Tinder profile just got better, because The Order just got a photo mode

Left swipe, left swipe, left swipe. That's what scores of Victorian-era London ladies did when they saw Galahad on Tinder. His profile was so boring -- just a bunch of pictures of the back of his head. Also, his bio said he ...

Brett Makedonski

4:30 PM on 04.10.2015

When Far Cry 4 goes right, it goes so, so right

"Hmm, shotgun's not gonna work for this boat. Damn. Guess I'll have to go down there. Oooh, cargo truck! Let's take care of this real quick... ... Totally meant to do that."

Brett Makedonski

3:30 PM on 04.10.2015

Friendly reminder: Last day to get the free Forza Horizon Fast & Furious game

Two weeks has already come and gone, meaning that today, April 10, is the last day you can pick up the free Forza Horizon 2 Presents Fast & Furious title for both Xbox One and Xbox 360. Beginning tomorrow, it jumps t...

Brett Makedonski

3:00 PM on 04.10.2015

Xbox uploaded a really old Gears of War video for some reason

You probably don't need to bother watching this video; it's nearly four years old at this point. That's when Gears of War 3 launched -- almost four years ago. Time flies and all that, eh? But, Xbox just uploaded the vid...

Brett Makedonski

5:30 PM on 04.09.2015

I am Bread's latest trailer exceeds all expectations

Bossa Studios is realistic with what people will expect from a simulator about being a slice of bread. The developer goes so far as to dedicate the first few seconds of this trailer to what that game might look like. Turns o...

Brett Makedonski

4:30 PM on 04.09.2015

Amazon's taunting amiibo collectors, and the amiibros love it

Amiibo enthusiasts are all taking a minute to laugh. That's rare because the vast majority of them have been on-edge for the past week, looking to do the near impossible: secure wave four pre-orders. A tweet from Amazon Games...

Brett Makedonski

4:00 PM on 04.09.2015

The new DayZ update seems to be breaking legs left and right

This rather boring GIF represents the agony that some DayZ players are going through. Version .55 just launched, and it looks like randomly broken legs are one of the features that rolled out. Just when you thought the ...

Brett Makedonski

3:00 PM on 04.09.2015

A Witcher 3 playtester needed 25 hours to speedrun the game

Everyone knew that The Witcher 3:Wild Hunt would be a massive game. CD Projekt Red's been touting that since early development, and, frankly, it was just kind of assumed anyway. Sure, there will be plenty of non-integral...

Brett Makedonski

12:30 PM on 04.09.2015

Next Call of Duty looks to be another Black Ops, and has a reveal date

The hype train powering the next Call of Duty reveal has been rolling along at full speed ever since Snapchat QR codes started showing up in the multiplayer levels of Black Ops II. It looks like that will all come to a ...

Brett Makedonski

3:30 PM on 04.08.2015

Microsoft again gives the finger to Conker fans

At its E3 press conference last year, Microsoft openly mocked Conker fans with a reveal that the infamous squirrel would be added to the free-to-download Project Spark. Everyone knew that this wasn't what anyone wanted ...

Brett Makedonski

2:30 PM on 04.08.2015

Need for Speed movie sequel's in the works, and it has a Chinese twist

Last year's Aaron Paul-led Need for Speed movie did surprisingly well at the box office despite being critically panned. Like all things that make money, the property's owners are looking to further exploit that success ...

Brett Makedonski

1:30 PM on 04.08.2015

Don't get too excited about Xbox's spring sale

Xbox players may have noticed recently that Microsoft has turned a new leaf when it comes to the quality of sales. Once known for being laughably bad, Microsoft's often very respectable Ultimate Game Sales have gone a long wa...

Brett Makedonski

12:30 PM on 04.08.2015

Namco's either revealing something, or it's practicing counting backward

Four days, 19 hours, 52 minutes, and 37 seconds. That's how long it'll be until Namco does something. Well, it'll probably be less for you, barring the possibility you possess the time-traveling capabilities to go to the imme...

Brett Makedonski