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Nov 23 // Aaron Linde

Destructoid review: Final Fantasy XII: Revenant Wings

If you're feeling bloated and half-retarded from eating enough starch to make a crude cement mix, a strategy RPG might be the last thing on your mind. But don't let something like feeling disgusted with yourself for stealing ...
Nov 19 // Aaron Linde

Destructoid Reviews: The Official Guide

There's been a general consensus among Destructoid staff and readership alike that clarification of our reviews process and metrics has been sorely needed for some time, and it's something that I've been wanting to do for awh...
Nov 12 // Aaron Linde

Destructoid review: Super Mario Galaxy

Given the hour, I'm assuming that a lot of you are likely waking up to this review. Perhaps some of you have fancies of Nintendo's latest flagship title Super Mario Galaxy dancing in your heads, holdovers from the dreams cult...
Nov 09 // Aaron Linde

Super Mario Galaxy touches down in Lindevania [Update: Impressions!]

After days (weeks? [months!?]) of painful anticipation, Super Mario Galaxy finally showed up on my doorstep, thanks to a kindly ol' FedEx delivery driver who knew not the bounty of wonder that he carried. Nintendo also sent a...
Nov 08 // Aaron Linde

Pew-Pewin' at the top of the world: EVE Fanfest 2007

I've gone on record more than once over my distaste for MMOs, but EVE Online has always been an exception, an asterisk slapped on an otherwise lengthy list of games I'd sooner rip my toenails off than play. Its single-shard, ...
Nov 01 // Aaron Linde

EVE Fanfest 2007: What the hell time is it?

After two hours by shuttle, twelve hours by plane and an hour cab ride into the city, I've finally arrived in Reykjavik for this year's EVE Online Fanfest 2007, CCP's yearly get-together at the top of the world for players, d...
Oct 24 // Aaron Linde

Restructuring, layoffs forthcoming at EA, Mythic Studios

Owing to sagging profits and and a less-than-firm grip on their once invulnerable spot at top of the third party heap, Electronic Arts is looking to make some changes in their corporate structure, starting with Mythic and the...
Oct 23 // Aaron Linde

Podtoid 34: My Cube, Let Me Show Him To You

What's inside The Orange Box? Sex. Sex and heroin. And with those contents firmly tucked in our pants, we embark upon Podtoid 34, in which two editors of Destructoid (plus one Weekly Geek) cover some news, answer some questio...
Oct 21 // Aaron Linde

Podtoid 34: Cakes and Cubes

While some of the staff is off in LA meetin' important people and playin' lots of games, the rest of us are here holding the fort, left home because we're just not pretty enough to represent Destructoid publicly. So us fuglie...
Oct 19 // Aaron Linde

My balls are lethal: Super Dodgeball Brawlers announced for NDS

I swear to God I won't let this degenerate into a nostalgia-fest, but c'mon -- Super Dodge Ball was awesome. It taught me two lessons that I reflect upon almost daily in my adult life: first, always run and leap before hurlin...
Oct 19 // Aaron Linde

Beautiful Katamari DLC announced; 800 points will buy you a complete game

Being a fan of rolling, nonsense, and the rampant homoerotic gestures of intergalactic regents, I picked up a copy of Beautiful Katamari earlier this week, eager to sink my teeth into the latest installment of one of my favor...
Oct 14 // Aaron Linde

Destructoid review: Final Fantasy Tactics: War of the Lions

Oh god, Final Fantasy Tactics. What I knew in my youth as the Bane of Academia, the Unholy Timeslayer. It's on a shiny new platform and has a nifty subtitle now, some additions and new job classes, but it's the same game and...
Oct 11 // Aaron Linde

Destructoid review: Portal

[This is just one of the new games available in The Orange Box. Don't forget to read our reviews of Episode Two and Team Fortress 2, and keep your eyes peeled for forthcoming console reviews.] It's no big secret that I've bee...
Oct 09 // Aaron Linde

Podtoid 33: Satellite Delay

I think I totally jinxed us when I was talking about, y'know, delays when soliciting requests for questions this past weekend. Turns out our recording software was listening and said "Hey, I got a crazy idea -- let's mak...
Oct 06 // Aaron Linde

Podtoid 33: Can we still be friends?

If I've learned anything from almost a year workin' this gig, it's this: an episode of Podtoid without unexplained delay simply ain't Podtoid. We had some terribly sexy plans for a Tokyo Game Show Wraptoid, but Niero was take...
Sep 30 // Aaron Linde

Destructoid review: The Legend of Zelda: Phantom Hourglass

Feel that? Zelda's in the air. Oh, that special time of year (or, y'know, span of years) where we finally get our hands on Link's latest adventure in Hyrule -- er, Hyrule or Some Neighboring Kingdom -- and consume ourselves i...
Sep 25 // Aaron Linde

O Bungie, Betrayer of your Brothers and Sisters in Development

Jeez, Bungie. Releasing Halo 3 and muscling out the other worthy releases of September 25th without even a thought as to the lives you're ruining and the families you're destroying. Good thing Mega64 created a dramatic re-ena...
Sep 24 // Aaron Linde

Destructoid Review: Halo 3

If I may beat a cliché firmly into the dirt just a few inches deeper, Halo 3 is a game that needs no introduction. I mean that literally. If you’re not decked out in your homemade MJOLNIR armor lovingly crafted...
Sep 21 // Aaron Linde

Team Fortress 2 impressions

When I was young, I had dreams of becoming a doctor, fostered as dreams tend to be by the games I played. Had I taken that long and expensive road through med school, I would have invariably been asked what prompted my pursui...
Sep 18 // Aaron Linde

Podtoid 32: Fat Japanese Girls edition

Evening, kittens. We’re coming up on a near year of Podtoid, and to celebrate this milestone the higher-ups thought that it’d be best if I destroyed the outfit as soon as possible, and therefore positioned me as h...
Sep 18 // Aaron Linde

Your monthly Aquaria reminder: seven minutes of the game

Right, Aquaria. We're still waiting patiently for the release of this game, and if you're not along with us, you should just get off this short bus at the next stop. In this latest footage of the game provided by Bit-Blot, we...
Sep 15 // Aaron Linde

Podtoid 32: Bloody Coup

Great civilizations often crumble at the height of their decadence. Last week on Podtoid 31, Nex and I were drizzling chocolate on bundles of hundred dollar bills and shooting them out of a flaming cannon -- it should come as...
Sep 14 // Aaron Linde

First Halo 3 copies in the wild

What's this? Linde's posting not one, but two stories 'bout Halo in a single afternoon? Truth is, the real Linde was brutally slain by one Dick "I Hate Fatties" McVengeance weeks ago. I am his replacement, the Linde...
Sep 14 // Aaron Linde

Halo 3 diorama brings ruin to editor's cynical hatred of game ads

As a means of breaking up our day-long marathon Halo 3 campaign experience earlier this week, the good people at Bungie brought us sandwiches and showed off a series of ads for the forthcoming release. Honestly, I was kind...
Sep 03 // Aaron Linde

Nintendo chief Iwata and designer Itoi talk shop over dinner

Been awhile, kids -- it's your favorite Linde, freshly returned from the barbaric wastes of Hungary, where goose liver serves as both key component to every meal and a common substitute for drinking water. Them folks are craz...
Aug 20 // Aaron Linde

Starmen.net assaults Nintendo of America with envelopes, books

You guys already know the score -- when there's movin' and shakin' in the way of EarthBound or Mother news, I'm usually the nerd on call to give you the skinny. And since almost every ounce of movin' and/or shakin' these days...
Aug 18 // Aaron Linde

Universe at War: Earth Assault hands-on impressions

I'd like to think that one of the most impressive tests of a game is the verdict rendered by a player who isn't necessarily an enthusiast of that particular genre. It's certainly not an opinion that you'd necessarily stack ab...
Aug 17 // Aaron Linde

Destructoid review: BioShock

I had almost lost hope. Almost. You know what article I've had sitting in my queue for almost two months? It's called "Requiem for the Single Player Campaign", and it was gonna be good ol' Linde up on his soap box complaining...
Aug 12 // Aaron Linde

Bargain Bin Laden #22: Psychonauts

Psychonauts. Yeah, I know -- sort of like Beyond Good and Evil, one of those games that needs no introduction, that almost hourly enjoys some sort of running of the mouth by one journalist or another. I'm introducing it as su...
Aug 09 // Aaron Linde

Pew! Pew! Preview!: Guild Wars: Eye of the North

Yesterday, I had an opportunity that comes once, maybe twice in a lifetime -- the chance to rekindle an old flame. No, not Nick Chester, we're broken up for good, you hear me? You only have to leave this editor at the altar o...






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