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So, I'm working on videogames now :D

How are you my friends? Long John here. It's been a while! (Even Steve Albini can't resist cats. And he pretty much hates everything.)So, I'm really busy. I got the job of my dreams: I'm working in a music recording stud...   more



Hey Dtoid, Have I Told You Lately That I Love You?

I've been walking the planent Earth for twenty five years now. And over the course of those twenty five years, I've learned some very important lessons, like what to eat and what not to eat, what not to stick in the ele...   more



Dtoid TF2 Server Updates

Today, the TF2 server finally got to see some major changes in both the map rotation as well as the addition of a brand new mode. Map Changes: Maps moved to Nomination list: Plr_pipeline Sd_doomsday Cp_mountainlab Cp_c...   more

Dtoid TF2 Server Updates


Dibs on... A Brick

Yes, a brick. Like the kind used to build walls. To be frank, I’m a few days late and a few dollars short of calling dibs on any real Smash characters, but who needs some claim on just one digital avatar? Let me te...   more

Dibs on... A Brick


Occam Thoughts: Level Up

Hello.   How have you been?  Well I hope.  Fall is here.  Well, "here" can be relative.   Its here in terms of the calendar but its still entirely too hot in my waking world.  I need i...   more



You're Going Down For The Count! I Call DIBS on Little Mac in Smash 4!

So, Super Smash Bros. 4 came out on the 3DS a little more than a week ago in Japan, revealing the final roster for us to see (don't worry, I won't spoil it here for those of you who don't want to know, and I a...   more



Leave Luck to Heaven: The Ten Best First Party Nintendo Games (#10-6)

         Love them or hate them, there’s no denying the impact Nintendo has had on the video game industry. Originally a card maker started in 1889, Nintendo tried its hand in multiple ind...   more

Leave Luck to Heaven: The Ten Best First Party Nintendo Games (#10-6)


Help Us Bury Our Step-Dad Please.

Fuck I don't even know where to begin. Actually, I do. I'm so sorry I'm here asking for help. You people are amazing and I love you and I'm sorry to ask for help like this. I wouldn't be doing this if I thought there wa...   more



Hey look, a new Cblog editor

I think? Let's play. Can I make this bold? Italic? Big? Small? How about a picture? Gif? Video? Featured: How long it took to get a new Cblog editor EDIT: There are clearly some problems with spacing, but everything el...   more



Love you all, Destructoid

love you all   more



The Phil Files - 01: Games from under your radar.

So a friend suggested I do a c-blog featuring all the shit I play (Damn you Jinx!). So I said fuck it. I used to try to highlight all the obscure shit on our (now defunct) podcast, but that ain't coming back soon and I'm bore...   more



Occam Thoughts: Podcasts

I have found myself seeking some accompaniment when I am playing video games.† I used to listen to albums and audio books but lately the name of the game has been podcasts.† There is nothing more pleasant than facing the hord...   more



You Wanna Adopt Me? I'd Adopt Me.

Another year has come and gone.† The hot dog breath of Summer is slowly relenting and giving way to the cool quiet of Fall.† PAX Prime aka the Battle in Seattle aka the Group Hug is happening starting tomorrow.† For some of y...   more



Only one day left to get your avatar adopted for PAX!

PAX Prime 2014 starts tomorrow and I want to take you with me! So far only ChillyBilly has bothered to post an adoption blog; the rest of you need to get your act together if you want to soar on papery wings to Seattle tomo...   more

Only one day left to get your avatar adopted for PAX!


Going to PAX? Why not take your favorite Dtoider with you?!

So you were one of the lucky few who managed to snag a pass to PAX this year. How exciting! You've got your flights booked, your hotel reserved, and your bags packed (boy, you're really on the ball this year), but there's s...   more



I've been Huge for almost a year now

LadiesÖ So we are closing in on the one year anniversary of Huge.† Itís been a controversial year since the original announcement to be sure.† There have been some interesting†responses about the†direction Dtoid is†heading....   more



Goodbye Robin

I just wanted to take a brief moment to say goodbye to a man who taught me how to laugh and the your eccentricities are a strength rather than a weakness. Yesterday, as I'm sure most of you know Robin Williams killed himself....   more



Fans of Battleborn never noticed this

Did you know Battleborn is an anagram for Lt. Boner Bat? † Clearly, itís a spiritual successor to Bonerquest. † #Journalism   more



What if Ganondorf and Link were...

beef spare ribs? Would you eat them?   more



I Love: My Dick!

What can I say about my dick? He is an awesome ass dude. Standing at 7-7.5" (interest depending) he is a stout, somewhat short gentlemen. He clocks in at decent girth of almost 2 inches and wears (what I'm told) is a very b...   more



Occam Thoughts: Youtube

So letís see.† Itís been a while since I wrote one of these.†Whatís new with me?† Iíve been engaging in all kinds of media lately.† Side note: That could be a really fancy way of saying looking at porn.† Iíve been playing...   more



Streamtoid: the Return of a Legend

Ladies and gentlemen, Iím proud to announce the return of Streamtoid. Yes, that Streamtoid; the Destructoid community run twitch.tv channel. Things will hopefully be a bit more streamlined this time around, with a couple o...   more



Kid-pressions: Goat Simulator

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Kid-pressions: Goat Simulator


(NVGR) Why I quit The Dismal Jesters

As some of you may know, I was doing a Podcast with former Dtoid writers Conrad Zimmerman and Jim Sterling called The Dismal Jesters. It was more-or-less a continuation of the version of Podtoid that Jim put together in 201...   more



Sup Holmes returns today at 4pm with Mike K from Ludum Dare

Hello! Thanks again to everyone that supported the Sup Holmes Kickstarter! We made almost 3 times our initial goal. We totally won.† The show is coming back today with Mike Kasprzak, one of the organizers of the Ludum Dare ...   more



The Five Best and Worst Mario Kart Courses

† ††Ah yes†Mario Kart, one of the few franchises that invoke feelings of joy and anger; sometimes at the same time. Since its debut on the Super Nintendo in 1992, the Mario Kart series has graced almost every Nintendo console...   more

The Five Best and Worst Mario Kart Courses


10 inches of long john

Hello my friends! Stay a while and listen... So, I've been here for some years but never properly introduced myself. I'm not a big fan of talking in lenghts (ha!) about me, but I'm not feeling very good and thought maybe thi...   more



A Peak Inside My Anus - Not Quite 10 Things About Philly

Welcome. Everyone seems to be hopping on this train and since I'm not one to be left out I thought I'd spread 'em and saddle up. 1: Cropdusting I am a cropdusting son of a bitch. I do it to my employees/patients all the ...   more



Occams Thoughts: 10 Things About Me

Top ten lists are a lot of fun. †Its a great chance to get to know the community and present yourself a bit. †You can let down your guard and get some community love and return the love in quick, urgent thrusts. †So here are ...   more



10 things about Isay Isay

1. I do a crossword/jumble everyday I attribute some of my love of wordplay to completing those puzzles.† You never know when you'll need to know what a wax covered Dutch cheese is or what Tokyo was named once. My grandmother...   more






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