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Jun 25 // PrinceofCannedPeaches

Money Well Unspent: Battlefield Heroes and the Rise of the "Gateway Game"

Like a lot of current-day gamers, I cut my online teeth on developer Jagex's pay-premium title Runescape. The formula was, perhaps, not a new one, but it worked: free access to start with, but you have to pay cash to do any...
Nov 03 // PrinceofCannedPeaches

Fallout 3: Life in the Post-Apocalypse

Oblivion's problems were never really about the combat. They were about much bigger reasons that were much more distasteful, sweeping things like story and characters. And in those departments, it seems Bethesda's finally do...
Oct 01 // PrinceofCannedPeaches

The Fear: The Art of Making You Piss Yourself

As a medium, games have an unprecedented ability to manipulate. Control isn't a one-way street; with total access to all your unconditioned animal responses, video games are a canvas for truly telling forays into what we are ...
May 06 // PrinceofCannedPeaches

Best of Craigslist: Dearest Gamestop Girl

Dearest GameStop Girl, When I walked into your store that fateful Tuesday, I expected only to find a smattering of half-decent titles tucked back there amongst the used 360 games. Instead I found you, surrounded by a beam ...
May 04 // PrinceofCannedPeaches

Roundtable: 2007 - the Best Year in Gaming?

Spotted this during one of my late night trips on StumbleUpon. Now, I watched intently and found myself nodding a lot, and up until number one, the only thing I found myself thinking was "Where is 2007?". With a tremendou...
Apr 17 // PrinceofCannedPeaches

When Did THIS Happen?

Via TheMinusWorld. Notice the shirt. How come everybody else knows about these things before I do?
Apr 13 // PrinceofCannedPeaches

To Bethesda Softworks: THIS IS YOUR TAGLINE!

I've always been a huge fan of Charles Bukowski's poetry (if you want to call it that). Simple language, simple style, simple scheme, and it packs so much unbelievable fervor and energy. Well, it just so happened I had Bethes...
Apr 07 // PrinceofCannedPeaches

NQVGR: Now THAT'S How You Use Wildlife!

William Singlagah, a 28-year-old New Zealander, went above and beoynd to express his fury towards a 15-year-old agitator in Wellington. For lack of a better weapon, he picked up and heaved-to with a nearby hedgehog, strikin...
Apr 04 // PrinceofCannedPeaches

AVATARTASTIC:Half-Life 2 Up For Grabs

I've had this gift copy of Half-Life 2 lying around on Steam since I bought The Orange Box, and I've been trying to give it away to close friends of mine but none of them have decent PCs, just out-of-box pieces of shite. So,...
Mar 30 // PrinceofCannedPeaches


It's fucking Hayden Chris Hansen.
Mar 30 // PrinceofCannedPeaches

Not My Turning Point Gaming Rig - My Cat is on All Three of Her Last Legs Edition

I love lava lamps. I hope beyond hope that somebody at Western is from Dtoid, so I'll know somebody when I go there. We can PNAR at a NARP. I'll buy the beer. Or find it, at least. He really does, you should trust him. This only happens when my processor is under load, for some reason. Not part of my rig, but she spends enough time in there.
Mar 30 // PrinceofCannedPeaches

SSBB Lyrics - Omelet F***ing Prevails

Saw this on Newgrounds very recently, a very satisfying Stumble from StumbleUpon. The creator says the original lyrics are such: Audi famam illius. I have heard of his rumor. Solus in hostes ruit He alone rushed into his ...
Mar 16 // PrinceofCannedPeaches

Birfday Poem!: Attention Whore Edition

Author's note: I like to consider myself a writer, if I consider myself anything. At least, it's my most developed skill besides drinking. So, when I seeing all the other artistic, musical, and wordtastic contributions oth...
Mar 15 // PrinceofCannedPeaches

This Article is F***ing Embarassing: Super-Chauvinism Edition!

I recently read an article on - a website presumably for gun aficionados - which, like the gaming Top 10's that crowd today's internet like Lara Croft's blouse, assert a number of uninspired and completely rote ...
Mar 07 // PrinceofCannedPeaches

My NEW Hard Drive Comes In Today!

It does! Looking forward to playing with Friday Night Fights again, if TF2 downloads in time.
Mar 06 // PrinceofCannedPeaches

The Wizard of Greyhawk: A Gary Gygax Memorial

In the world of geekdom and gaming, a world made famous by the blissful escapism it provides, it becomes very sobering to deal with the things we try to avoid: personal problems like drug addictions or dissolving marriages, c...
Mar 02 // PrinceofCannedPeaches

Commentation is GO! - New Banner?

I've been doing some work on some new banners for my blog. I'm posting all the candidates here, I've only got one done so far but I have to do some work now, so I'll keep posting with new ones as they come. Feedbakk pleej.
Feb 26 // PrinceofCannedPeaches

I HATE AUTO-ADS: Sylvia "WTF" Plath Edition?

So, I'm just puttering around online fifteen minutes ago when I notice something unusual in one of the auto-generated adverts at the bottom of the page. Now, it's an article related strictly to gaming, which is going to be re...
Feb 26 // PrinceofCannedPeaches

Say a Prayer for Me, Tuesdayers

Those of you who play in TF Tuesdays: Say a prayer (or cook some spaghetti) for me as you play tonight. Today marks my third consecutive week without functioning gaming apparatus. No, I did not purchase a "Bill Gates Fail Machine", I just have really shitty luck, and happened to trust Seagate. Hope to see you in there next week.
Feb 21 // PrinceofCannedPeaches

Blu-Ray - YOU. WIN.

Two days ago, Toshiba announced that they had ceased production on all HD-DVD media and equipment. Essentially, the war between the two competing high definition storage mediums - Blu-Ray and Toshiba's "HD-DVD" - has drawn to a close. In honor of this epic victory, let us now give a collective "Huzzah" and hug our PStriples
Feb 18 // PrinceofCannedPeaches

Good Idea/Bad Idea: Extrinsic Rewards (Achievements)

Author's Note: I'm looking for someone to argue the positive side of this. My fingers are bitchin' up a storm over here, and I don't want to get too long-winded on yeh. Any volunteers? It has been - and I mourn for this - a...
Feb 14 // PrinceofCannedPeaches

I, For One...

Would like to wish you a happy Valentines day. Unlike these other heartless misanthropes, I - despite being lamentably single - can somehow manage to enjoy the giddy delirium of the Feb Fourteen commercial clusterfuck known for these bastards. Somehow. Birth defect? Happy Valentine's Day, Destructoid!
Feb 13 // PrinceofCannedPeaches

No. Goddamned. Way.

A lot of you have probably played Offroad Velociraptor Safari, seeing as it's free and you're cheap. And I know, while you were playing it, you probably thought: "Hitting raptors with a sodding jeep! This is the best thing th...
Feb 10 // PrinceofCannedPeaches

NVGR - Thanks for Sharing!

Thought I'd enrich your day. Some of the best ones I've had? "Gonna be a while? Grab a prostitute!" "Get the hand habit." "You'll wonder where the yellow went, when you brush your teeth with The Dentist" (mostly because it actually makes sense) "Make every penetration count." "When the going gets tough, the tough get dildoes."
Feb 09 // PrinceofCannedPeaches

Friday Night Futurewhoring

I hate to be the guy that has you hanging on his word - your mother was very vocal about her disappointment - but FNF was incredible, and you should all be looking relentlessly forward to not only a TF2 machinima parody of "3...
Feb 08 // PrinceofCannedPeaches

Watch This and Never Recover

This has nothing to do with gaming. But for what it's worth, I don't give a flying fuck. Look, I drink... My blog anyways, bitches.
Feb 07 // PrinceofCannedPeaches

Good Idea/Bad Idea: Sandbox Games

Due to my rigorous training as a member of the Fisher-Price militia when I was a young , I gained motor control enough to press a button within a very few months of my life on Earth; what this meant for me (and you, thank ...
Feb 07 // PrinceofCannedPeaches

Stalling for Time

I put this in here to prime you while I complete my Good Idea/Bad Idea entry in MS Word. But, honest to God, it's one of the most candid and well-written articles I've seen in a while, regardless of what function it serves in this blog. Read it now, and be enlightened.
Feb 04 // PrinceofCannedPeaches

Some Garry's Mod TF2 Tomfoolery

At other user's behest, I compiled all of today's Garry's Moddery into one post. Sorry for the spam, folks.
Feb 02 // PrinceofCannedPeaches

ANNE TIE HAIP MACHEEN! - A Completely (Un)Fair Kane and Lynch (Re)View

Kane and Lynch is not a bad game. Moving on. I recently had the opportunity to play the game that got Jeff Gerstmann fired (?) and almost sank the Internets, and I've gotta say, we've really been making a bigger deal of ...

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