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Mar 20 // UsurpMyProse

Being a Monster Hunter is way better than being a Pokemon Trainer

I’m 70 hours into Monster Hunter 4 Ultimate, and the game has firmly sunk its hooks, claws, fangs, and Seltas horns into me. After failing to make it past the steep learning curve in the series’ previous ent...
Mar 03 // ChillyBilly

Cold William and the Nifty Nine +1

Hey there. Feels like ages since I've posted anything in the c-blogs. Ever since I left the FNF stuff behind I feel like I've kinda disconnected from Destructoid and the community in general.  Weird. Anywho, I'm her...
Feb 08 // UsurpMyProse

Five videogames that make way better Netflix shows than The Legend of Zelda

The internet recently lost its collective shit over a potential live-action Netflix adaptation of The Legend of Zelda. Of course, the internet also recently lost its collective shit over Katy Perry’s goofy dancing...
Jan 26 // ChillyBilly

Community playdate manager no more

That’s right, after almost two years of bringing all of you the latest and greatest Team Fortress 2sday and Friday Night Fights posts, I’m calling it quits. This has nothing to do with Destructoid, this is c...
Jan 11 // UsurpMyProse

Most Anticipated Videogame Disappointments of 2015

If 2014 taught us anything, it’s that Tay Swift’s still got it. If 2014 taught us anything else, it’s that we should never be excited for videogames. The year’s most hyped releases were met ...
Nov 16 // UsurpMyProse

Ranking Overwatch's characters from worst to best

I’m not sure how I feel about Overwatch, Blizzard’s recently announced take on squad-based shooters. On the one hand, Blizzard knows how to craft a compelling IP, and if the playfully corny, Pixar-esque...
Oct 09 // ChillyBilly

Fangs for the Memories: His name was Jason

Halloween is, without a doubt, my favorite time of the year. Since I can remember, I’ve always been a huge fan of horror movies, and things that were meant to scare you. Maybe it’s because I spent most of my...
Aug 18 // ChillyBilly

I'm not going to PAX, because I suck. Adopt my avatar, please.

Happy Monday! (it's Monday, right?) It's that time of year again, "PAX avatar adoption" time! As usual, I will not be attending PAX this year. I believe this makes.....every year now that I've missed PAX. Yea, that sounds ab...
Jun 14 // UsurpMyProse

10 things about UsurpMyProse because I DONíT KNOW!

Oh, why, hello Dtoid! I didnít see you come in. I was just sitting here by my fireplace, enjoying a nice glass of cognac as I discuss the dayís politics with other men of great stature. By which I mean Iím lying in bed shirtl...
Jun 08 // ChillyBilly

Hey there, it's been a while...

Happy Sunday! I figure it's been long enough since my last real blog post. Not exactly sure where this is going to go yet, just going to kinda start writing and see where we end up... So, how 'bout that Destructoid huh? Sit...
May 24 // UsurpMyProse

I'm sick of saving Hyrule

After finally finishing A Link Between Worlds, I believe thereís only one phrase that can adequately summarize my feelings toward the seventeenth entry in the storied Zelda franchise: Goddamnit. Seriously, Hyrule? Link ha...
Feb 13 // UsurpMyProse

The Past: Who the hell puts Mew under a truck?

Ten year olds are idiots. Letís face facts Ė it is a miracle that any of us are sitting here today, instead of having perished during the age where the only thing preventing us from chugging down a gallon of dish detergent ...
Jan 03 // UsurpMyProse

Steam Holiday Sale damage report

The holidays are over, which means itís time to put away the Christmas lights, stop pretending like you can tolerate your loved ones, and survey the smoking crater the latest Steam sale has left behind in place of your bank...
Dec 30 // ChillyBilly

Dtoid GOTY 2013: Bill Platt's picks

2013 was a pretty great year to be a gamer. The indie scene absolutely exploded, we had two brand new consoles launch, and there were more solid, quality titles to play than I had time for. I did however have time to play so...
Dec 11 // UsurpMyProse

My big, stupid, honking list of 2013's best videogame... things

Time marches on. A tide sweeping over us in seconds, minutes, hours, days, weeks, months, years. Orchestrating the rise and fall of civilizations. Establishing cities of elaborate wonder before reducing them to dust and ash...
Aug 10 // ChillyBilly

An Intro to Me: Your New Community Playdate Manager!

Hello, Hi there. How's it going? So, uh..nice weather we're having here huh? †Yea, real nice weather there... Look, I hate these intro things, you hate them, hell we ALL hate them, so why donít we just skip to the good stuf...
Jun 24 // UsurpMyProse

Doug TenNapel, I hate you and I hope your game gets funded

Heroes will always disappoint you. I donít mean to sound like a fourteen year old who just discovered Morrissey, but the sad truth is that no amount of faith in the inherent good of humanity can guard us against inevitable ...
Jun 23 // Zodiac Eclipse

Did Bioware unintentionally make Saren transgendered?

After putting it off long enough for Bioware to officially call Mass Effect 3 and it's parade of DLC finished I'm finally doing my complete, long awaited, final all inclusive playthrough of the series. Now, I've made it throu...
May 08 // UsurpMyProse

Why we should never pay $60 for a videogame

Iím cheap. Frugal. Miserly. A man of generic brands and packed lunches. Of 2-for-1 deals and 10% tips. Someone who feels a twinge of regret over every cent that leaves their bank account.† Naturally, my penny pinching met...
Apr 10 // UsurpMyProse

Newtwo: Game Freak's blatant attempt to ruin my childhood

Look Game Freak, we need to talk. I know youíre hard at work on Pokťmon X and Y Ė after all, that umpteenth boulder puzzle isnít going to lay itself out Ė but we need to address this past weekendís, shall we say, events. On...
Mar 21 // TriplZer0

The Best Scarves in Gaming

Letís face it: scarves make anything cool. Case in point, Fred from Scooby Doo. Do you think he became the leader of the gang because of his brains? Hell no. Itís because of that devilishly stylish scarf he wears. This does...
Mar 11 // UsurpMyProse

The top ten Steam games I will never play

I canít be the only one who feels a twinge of guilt every time they open Steam. Playing a game on my laptop means having to search through a sea of grey for a handful of bright spots. I realize thatís true of a lot of thing...
Mar 07 // TriplZer0

Help me prepare for GDC 2013

Iím going to GDC this month, and to be honest, Iím really nervous. Itís my first GDC. Hell, itís my first big convention. I mean, Iíve wandered around Comic Con down in San Diego a couple of times, but that was always just ...
Feb 14 // TriplZer0

Love the One You Canít Be With

or Three Valentine's Day Videogame Crushes With Valentineís Dayóthe contrived greeting card holiday day of love and romanceóupon us, I figured now would be the perfect time for us gamers to reflect on those characters we d...
Jan 03 // TriplZer0

Still Playing: Dragon Age II

I recently finished my fourth playthrough of Dragon Age II (I previously wrote about my time collecting the gameís trophies), but only on my second of Dragon Age: Origins. Why is that? According to public opinion among game...
Dec 28 // ChillyBilly

ChillyBilly - A.K.A "Bill"

Thanks to the wonderful power of the Internet as well as the awesome fella that is Hamza I proudly present to you, "Bill". Bill A totally hot guy who is so freaking smart but is not geeky. Bill is witty and has a quick wick...
Oct 15 // TriplZer0

Playing the Waiting (Video)game

Some games you win by having great reflexes. Other games you win by remembering sequences of intricate button presses. And others you win just by dumb luck. But then thereís another type of gameóthe game you win by out-wai...
Aug 14 // ChillyBilly

My Avatar Is The Hero PAX Deserves, But Not The One It Needs Right Now.

It looks like it's that time of year again! What time, you ask? Why it's "adopt my avatar to take with you to PAX because I have too much stuff going on in my life right now to get there myself time", that's what time it i...
Jun 25 // UsurpMyProse

Why am I excited for the Wii U? Shut the hell up, that's why.

Being a Nintendo fan is a unique brand of insanity. As an owner of a Nintendo system through every generation of consoles, Iím someone who has been playing the same video games over and over again for the last 24 years. I've ...
Jun 17 // UsurpMyProse

Digitally Disappointed Dads: Games spent trying to impress your father

Itís Fatherís Day today, which means itís time to give the paternal figure in your life a call, send him a card, or patch over years of festering resentment for failing to live up to his expectations with a gift card to Lowes...

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