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Jul 10 // Mike Martin

Better With Age: My D*ck

Since Nanners is a giant buttface, dickhole, cuntflap (just kidding boo), I had to change my idea for this month's.... Musing? BoB? You fucks have too many names for the same God damn things now days. So instead of writing a...
Jul 05 // Mike Martin

I Miss You

It’s been a year. Oh, what a year it has been my friend. So much darkness, so much light. I know, I’m a drama queen sometimes. Can’t help it. It’s not easy wrestling with all this, especially when I h...
Apr 17 // Mr Andy Dixon

10 NEW things about mrandydixon (also, ask me anything!)

Hi! It's been a while since I did one of these, so now I'm doing it! You should do it, too :) I've interspersed this blog with some recent pics of my kids to hold your attention, and I won't waste any more time getting ...
Apr 10 // Mr Andy Dixon

I love you all, and that's why I'm retiring from Dtoid

[Pictured: The Dtoid community in 2011. My first PAX.] This is unbelievably hard. [HA! Already with the boner jokes. But really.] In fact, it may be the most difficult decision I've ever come to. But it's been weigh...
Apr 09 // Mike Martin

(NVGR) An AMA with Mike Martin/PhilKenSebben

Hello everyone. I was just down in my home and saw a complaint that struck a chord with me. It was one I had myself, back when my name was filled with 3's and my shitposting was at an all time high: The lack of staff in...
Mar 17 // Mr Andy Dixon

Get to know the Destructoid community team!

Dtoid really is the best website on the planet Earth. And like any best thing, a TON of effort goes into making it that way. The writers do a great job working their tight little tooshies off day in and day out to churn...
Mar 12 // Mike Martin

Friday Night Flicks! Phil's ode to the 80's

So like Frights, we would watch movies (duh). Only we watch movies only from the 80s and I'm shooting for action/adventure/comedy/etc. No horror flicks, as that is what Frights is for and I'm not about to get slapped wi...
Mar 03 // Mike Martin

9 Dtoiders I'd Like To F**k

How the fuck is someone like me supposed to sit down and pick nine of you to feature in a list like this? All the friendships I've made, those I've tried to help, those that have helped me.... man. As a longtime member ...
Feb 27 // Mr Andy Dixon

Leonard Nimoy has died :'(

I'm not normally one to write a eulogy blog -- especially a mostly NVGR one (Seaman notwithstanding) -- but the news of Leonard Nimoy's passing has really hit me hard :'( By all accounts Nimoy w...
Feb 23 // Mike Martin

(NVGR) Cooking with Phil - First Edition

Welcome hungry readers. Listen to my stomach roar. Through a boombox. Look, I couldn't find a decent header and I just fucking winged it, ok? All the pictures are weird sized. I got lazy at the end. 2104 FUCKING WORDS A...
Feb 02 // Mike Martin

Clan/Team/Group Roundup. & PC FNF Blogger Wanted

Short and to the point for this one. Leave a comment below with your clan/team/group or whatever, ID/Tag, so that I may add this to future FNF posts. Let's have a little roundup of everyone's groups and games (leave wha...
Jan 29 // Mike Martin

Your new Community Playdate Manager is a twat.

See that guy? He's a cartoon character stupids. He was an avatar used by a guy known as PhilKenSebben around here. Phil is gone now. RIP you username chosen in a moment of great fucked upitude. I'm the asshole behind th...
Jan 07 // Mr Andy Dixon

Community podcasters: help us get you more listeners!

Are you a Dtoid community podcaster? If so, this post is for you! Here's the deal: Occams and I are working on a front page thing to promote our fine community podcasters (that's you), but we need a bit of help to get i...
Dec 25 // Mike Martin

Merry F*cking Christmas You F*cks

I was out searching for that thing(Ha Ha Thingy!) and while out, I realized something: I am fucking amazing. Do you know how lucky you all are? Who else will make sweet, sweet love to you at anytime of the day? Who else...
Dec 23 // Mike Martin

The 2014 Philly Awards

Welcome to the first time, bi-sexual, annual, anal Philly awards. These awards are designed to showcase games this year that I gave a shit about or hated, or jerked off to/on. Disclaimer: I was definitely paid at some p...
Dec 22 // Mr Andy Dixon

Here's just the tip of what's coming your way, HUGE members

As of last month, I have officially taken over the task of making your HUGE memberships something worth dropping $3/month on again. That started with a fun new "Bonus Levels" monthly newsletter (new issue out tomor...
Nov 19 // Mr Andy Dixon

Do you want to be a future guest on Radio Destructoid?

Radio Destructoid records its 50th episode this Saturday -- 50! -- and we've been blessed with some truly amazing guest hosts from the community over the course of the last two years. Well, we want to continue...
Nov 07 // Mr Andy Dixon

What DOOM could learn from modern shooters

DOOM is timeless. I don't think anyone would argue against that. And yet, while it's one of my absolute all-time favorite games and I'm beyond happy to replay it year after year (which I do), even I can admit ...
Oct 31 // Mr Andy Dixon

Pouring one out for Prey 2

I guess I should have seen it coming. I mean, all the signs were fucking there. Development hell doesn't even begin to describe what Prey 2 went through these past few years; how could...
Sep 05 // Mr Andy Dixon

Hey look, a new Cblog editor

I think? Let's play. Can I make this bold? Italic? Big? Small? How about a picture? Gif? Video? Featured: How long it took to get a new Cblog editor EDIT: There are clearly some problems with spacing, but everything el...
Sep 02 // Mike Martin

The Phil Files - 01: Games from under your radar.

So a friend suggested I do a c-blog featuring all the shit I play (Damn you Jinx!). So I said fuck it. I used to try to highlight all the obscure shit on our (now defunct) podcast, but that ain't coming back soon and I'm bore...
Aug 27 // Mr Andy Dixon

Only one day left to get your avatar adopted for PAX!

PAX Prime 2014 starts tomorrow and I want to take you with me! So far only ChillyBilly has bothered to post an adoption blog; the rest of you need to get your act together if you want to soar on papery wings to Seattle tomo...
Aug 18 // Mr Andy Dixon

Going to PAX? Why not take your favorite Dtoider with you?!

So you were one of the lucky few who managed to snag a pass to PAX this year. How exciting! You've got your flights booked, your hotel reserved, and your bags packed (boy, you're really on the ball this year), but there's s...
Jul 16 // Mike Martin

I Love: My Dick!

What can I say about my dick? He is an awesome ass dude. Standing at 7-7.5" (interest depending) he is a stout, somewhat short gentlemen. He clocks in at decent girth of almost 2 inches and wears (what I'm told) is a very b...
Jun 11 // Elsa

So, you want to be my friend...

So... if you met me at a party would you walk up and hand me a picture of lesbian porn?  I don't really care if you're female, or if you're gay, but you might want to introduce yourself first and say "hi", before giving me ...
May 09 // Char Aznable

State of the Dtoid Address

Dear Niero, Hamza, and Dale, The community needs to be better informed and more involved with what is going on around the site. There have been 13 different shit storms going on in the last week or two across all parts of Dt...
May 08 // Elsa

10 reasons why Elsa is always right...

1.  If you're a male, you're wrong.  One thing I've learned from gaming media in recent years is that being a woman makes me always right.  Apparently I lack "privilege" even though I'm a middle class white woman with a n...
Apr 09 // Mike Martin

Contest Time Bro - Steam Only

Suppers brahs and brahettes. Been awhile since I ran a contest time and I'll be damned if this game didn't inspire me to run another. I'm of course talking about Broforce. This game has been giving more fun than a lot of purc...
Feb 19 // Mr Andy Dixon

[NVGR] Prepare yourself, Idaho: I'm about to come inside you

Me in Idaho Hello Dtoiders! As some of you may already know, my wife recently got a new job, so my family will be moving to Boise on March 8th. I will continue working at my same day job (from home) and also performing my D...
Jan 23 // Mr Andy Dixon

Occams electric toothbrush is your new Cblog Manager

It's been a long time coming. (Like my wiener!) As my daily duties direct my attention elsewhere and I find myself being pulled in more directions than my penis when my wife and kids are gone for the weekend and I have the...

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